Let's laugh - Matrix. Next series.

Track: XoСeTcq  
Author: YraDau, kTo ;)  
-------------------------------------------------------

                       Oshki-voshki,       
                       Mosquitoes and midges!  
                       Bucarags and beetles,  
                       Locusts and worms!


              Chapter one.              


  In the middle of a large clearing stood a short
tall man in a cowboy hat.  High
raising his head and closing his eyes, he seemed
elk listened to the birds singing.  Or maybe noise
river flowing nearby, the chirping sound of
little fish in the tall grass...               

-Yes, he is deaf in both ears! - barely audible
came from behind the bushes. It is there that
two comrades were sitting in the garden: IOO
Batman and IOA Joker. Nearby, in a puddle of mud,
IOI Redemtor crawled, but since he was
skillfully camouflaged as anti-tank
hedgehog, then no one noticed him.     

-In short, my planthat's how it is. - Batman started.
- You, Joker, take this log, -
Batman glanced at the huge log
but, lying in a neighboring clearing, - and under-
you go to IOU Sauron. In the meantime I'm be-
ru another log,” he looked at the left
pressing a twig nearby - and suddenly
I'm attacking Sauron.  And in between times you de-
you bark as if you decided to Sauron
protect.  Well, everything is there, you go in
trust him...                        

-Well, you, Batman, are just like Redemptor, -
Joker began his response speech; crawling non-
far away the hedgehog froze in an incomprehensible pose,
with all my being trying as much as possible
move your ear closer to his interest -
to the appropriate source of sound information. What,
Of course, it didn’t work out, and he flopped
into a puddle, dousing everything within a radius of several
tens of meters of dirty splashes.       

-What is this? - Joker was wary.          

-Probably a bird.  - answered calmly
Batman and friends continued their discussion
of his evil plan.                  

  Meanwhile, Sauron shifted his feet
on his leg, took a compass out of his pocket,
thundered on it and went north, although bright
leather-yellow arrow in the form of a rotten plank with
the inscription "there" clearly pointed to
east.                                  

-Ah, Frost, Frost, Frost! - hummed Sau-
ron. -Where did you take the bubble?              

  Suddenly someone appeared from around the benda figure whom Sauron immediately recognized
Bakena.                                  

-Buoy!  - Sauron started first. -You're Mo-
haven't you seen the rose?                           
-Nope!  - he answered. Here Sauron replaced
til what his interlocutor is holding in his hand
battery with the inscription "Baken 001 1.5V/A", to
the lid of which was carefully attached
a rope that served as a handle.  - Where is he?
to you?                                    

-Yes, you see, I sent him for a bottle,
but he’s still not there. - Sauron said and
winced. - Haven’t you already had a drink...         

-What are you talking about, how can he live without a bite?
will drink.  Hmm... Yes... How do you drink it?
were you going to?  - Asked Baken, for some reason
shaking the battery in front of Sauron.      

“Well, it’s clear,” Sa answered knowingly.
damage, - we will snack on willow crusts -
vat.                                    

-Well, I would offer you some electrolyte...   

-No, we don’t need your electrolyte! -
Sauron answered decisively.  - We are better
let's catch a fish with live bait...                

-What kind of live bait?                        

-What are you doing? What other than Frost could there be?
live bait?   - Sauron answered laughing and
in a friendly way pushed Baken, so that he didn’t
managed to keep his balance and fell into
a puddle of mud.                              

-Tourists, amateurs... - Re grumbled -
dumptor and crawled onto land.Chapter two.              


-Oh, you goy, Sauronushka! - met
residents of the village of Morozovka, respected state
cha.  Sauron wiped the sweat from his face with his sleeve,
rallied and asked again:                 

-Which one are you? Why are you driving a snowstorm... It’s not frosty
you?                                     
-So how? Here we are!                      

-What does he do?                            

-So you know what - you get a hangover!        

  While Sauron was wondering in his mind how
the frost managed to pass two hundred in a day
miles from the clearing to Morozovka, and even
to get drunk, IOD Felix, a local, came up
eccentric.  In one hand he held a torch and
several copper rods, and in the other -
ten kilogram lead ingot, not
less.                                  

-Young man!  - Felix turned to
To Sauron.  - You don't need a direct controller
what access?                            

  Felix has long surpassed his era in terms of
level of intellectual development, but
people didn't understand this.                  

  And Sauron decided to go to the blacksmith Teapot.
Kettle was a cyberpunk and had in his
There are many implants in the body.             

                    - Hello, Teapot!  -
                    greeted the hundred
                    horny friend Sauron. Butthe blacksmith answered him
                    hammer on the kettle,
                    and Sauron fell into darkness
                    side trans.         



             Chapter Three.               

 -I'm hungover the next morning                      
  Drank the whole bottle to the bottom!              
  It's ten o'clock -                  
  I'll eat Sauron now!                   

When to the paw-shaped ears of Sauron
the first two lines came, before our eyes
it located at different distances
from the nose, but what kind of nose is that - a nickel,
so, in front of these fish eyes,
saw a tear. When Frost finished singing the ditty -
ku, Sauron was seriously alarmed and
woke up.  There was no one nearby, only
the stars and the bright yellow moon look down on
looked at him and were surprised.               

-And my boots were stolen! - concluded Sa-
damage, seeing your bare feet. On but-
gah there were six fingers, but that's how it is
word.                                   

  He lay down on the grass again and thought about
where could Frost go with his
half a liter.  When suddenly his thoughts
interrupted by the song. Sauron could not yet speak her words
make it out, but it was heard louder and louder
and louder. And finally, the singer came up
to Sauron.                               

-Lonely, apparently she’s alone                
 Bdeserted silence!                     

-Who the hell is... lonely?  - uncertain, with
Sauron asked the stranger in confusion.
It is unknown where they appeared in the sky
clouds blocked the way to the light of the night light
tila.                                    

-Moon.  - the stranger answered and suggested
Biscuit for Sauron.  Well, Sauron doesn't have teeth
was, and he was forced to politely refuse
to get involved, sending a stranger to three covenants -
new letters - in LRU, but where did you think?   

-Well, as you wish. - Nez said calmly
finally and began to gnaw on the cracker,
scattering drool left and right.      

-Wait, who are you? - having come to his senses, he asked
Sauron psyl.                             

     /                                   
- Shura I am.  - the interviewee answered calmly -
nick and continued his meal.            
     /                                   
-Shura?.. Sasha?.. Sanya?!.         

-Yeah!                                    

-Buoy?!!!  - Sauron yelled and hit Bake -
on the first thing that came to hand. WTO
just what exactly he came across - un-
it is known, but only from this moment neither the one
neither of them remembered anything.             


            Chapter next.             


  The next morning Sauron found himself lying on
a huge haystack.  Immediately realizing that
It’s better not to look down, he closed his eyes and
jumped inthe abyss.  Down in unconsciousness
Baken stayed. Well, after a short time...
conversation (What happened yesterday?... What pi-
really?...) friends decisively decided (yes,
just like that) go and find Frost,
to take away the treasured half-liter from him
and get a hangover.                           
  Having passed the outskirts, they came to a low
hut (who doesn’t know - this is such a hut,
coated with clay and other... uh... pro-
ducts). The clay layer was quite thick
- friends guessed this when they saw
Moroz with his head stuck in the wall.
It’s immediately obvious that he took it for a ram. But usually
he succeeded the first time.    

-Blendam-ed... - a groan was heard from
Frost's side.                          

  Sauron understood his comrade, and
Baken, shrugging his shoulders, decided to go around the hut.
around, look around, find the entrance, exit,
toilet, and something else.            
  Meanwhile, Frost’s consciousness cleared up.
elk, he pulled his head out of the wall and collapsed
zero to the ground.                            

-What do you want there?  - asked Sauron
Moroz, pointing at the hut.       
-Stupid was buried there! - answered hard
Frost and tried to get up.                

-Lie down, lie down!  - Sauron stopped him. -
Maybe you have something broken. - And
looked in surprise at the mutilated
wall of the hut.                              

-Here withoutGandalf is indispensable! - ambassadors-
came from around the corner. Buken appeared, puffy
trying to point fingers at the same time
This hut has no doors.           

  Well... We need Gandalf - there will be
Gandalf.  Friends decided to send him
Frost, because after seeing the party at half-
nom composition, Gandalf would never be with them
will go.  Well, Moroz... He is a kind man-
ry, simple;  he’ll come and call... What’s wrong
shouldn't he go?                            


              The chapter is different.              

-Where?!  - Geng yelled, his eyes wide,
dalf. - To what house?!                 

- So, to Stupid!!! - frost answered proudly
and for greater show-off he put his hands on
belt                                    

-To Stupidon?   - interested pe-
asked Gandalf.                      

-To him.  - confirmed Moroz and friends
We went to Stupid's mud hut. Inter-
In fact, Gandalf was pondering how he would
vatize (read - commune) the school
pidovsky computer  - I stump him... him
this one... dragged away... Yes...                 

-Stump?  Why do you need a stump? For firewood? - by-
Frost was curious.                    

-Don't interfere!  - Gandalf had almost already
plan ready. But when they approached the hut,
The frost stopped abruptly, causing Gen-
Dalf crashed into Frost, lost equal
weight and fell to the ground, forgetting everything about
I was just thinking.                    

-Well, I came up with it, like the stump of Stupi-
will you take it? - Frost cut through the silence.      

-Let's improvise!   - answered decisively
Gandalf jumped up and burst into the house,
having built impressive dimensions behind him in the wall
mer doorway inviting everyone inside
willing.                                


             Chapter next.            


-Oh, guests!  - with an incomprehensible expression
faces greeted Stupid's comrades. -
What winds brought you to me, huh?
How many years, how many winters...              

-In kind!  - added Frost, and his laughter
echoed right up to the neighboring
villages.                                 
-Why didn't you open the door? - menacing
Gandalf asked Stupid.                

- So... - Stupid was embarrassed, - I have and
there is no door... How, hee hee, can I magic
Open the door when I’m not there! Yes,
- he continued decisively, - I don’t have
no door!..                           

  Friends, meanwhile, began to look askance at
throw at the table in the middle of the room,
on which stood something covered
an old blanket.                          

-Is this your stump? - I was curious
Frost?                                   

-He's the one!  - answered proudlyStupid and
pulled off the blanket. Not the front panel proudly
The number 100 was shining.                     

-Is this a megahertz or a megabyte?  - asked
Frost, poking his finger at the glowing numbers,
ki, for which he immediately received a punch from Stupid
hand.                                    

-Megacycles!  - Stupid answered proudly. -
Shall I bring you some tea?                        

-Drag!   - Gen agreed in a worldly manner -
dalf.                                   

  When Stupid went into the kitchen, Gandalf
took a screwdriver (big!) out of his pocket,
unscrewed two screws and removed the roof from the computer
ku.  Those present began with interest
look at the insides of this stump. Them
Over time, Gandalf pulled out all the peripherals -
new cards, put them on the floor, and then...
Then, with a feeling of knowledge of the matter and deep-
I jumped on them with great satisfaction. Os-
tatki (shards, fragments...) crucified but-
gami.  Then (horror!), taking it out of his pocket
huge pliers (the same ones that
once held the Frost of Sauron, see previous
current MSFs), carefully broke everything
slots, starting with ISA and ending with VLB. Under
the end, taking out a chisel, he “separated” from
motherboard cache and buried it in the standing
nearby there is a pot with a dried cactus.
Then, as if nothing had happened, he spun
put both bolts in place and sat down on
high chair                                

-Here comes the tea! - joyfullyStupid yelled,
carrying cups with some liquid. Frost and
Sauron drank the entire contents of the tea in one gulp.
shek, which made them feel a little better. With bo-
they were tormented by thirst (although, from what
duna?  So, out of habit...), and they tried
strength from Stupida supplements.                  

“But it’s in vain that you do this...” he began thoughtfully.
Gandalf, when Stupid came out. - He's tea from
boils urine.  And at night he meditates on
"desktop" of Windows...              

-Bring me some jam? - came from the kitchen.  

-Drag!  - Gandalf answered.  In my head
Another plan has matured for him.              

 Next chapter.             


  ...At the friendly request of Gandalf, Stu-
Pid had been cooking porridge in the kitchen for the second hour.
Meanwhile Gandalf, with the oh-so-clever
looking like he was walking around the computer with a plate in
left hand, and with a false one in the right. How hu-
dozhnikov in moments of creative insight
walk around the canvas. It was clear that he was
is in a creative search, so
friends decided not to distract him and quietly
jammed found under Stupid's bed
holiday stock of moonshine.              
  Finally, Gandalf stopped,
scooped up a spoonful of jam and blurted it out
onto the power supply, then pushing it
inside through the ventilation slots. So again
and more, from all sides. He kept pushing and
pushed jam into the power supply untilit
climbed.  He took the last spoon that didn’t fit
casually blurted out on the cooler.                


 What chapter is there already?           


-Thank you for the coffee! - calmly benevolent
Gandalf gave the Stu- fiddling in the kitchen
pida, pouring coffee from a cup into the door of the dis-
driver  - Huge for you, unspreadable
thank you!                                 

  He had never been so happy!    


         Chapter here... next...        


- Porridge... baby... - he grumbled displeasedly
Gandalf, pushing the porridge into the wine case,
Chester...                               


      Last chapter (for today!)      


-Well, Stupid, it's time for us! - shaking Stupida
hand, said Gandalf. We come to you somehow
We'll come again.                         

- Definitely!  - Sauron supported. And you-
pinched Gandalf's sleeve. The frost came out on its own
and the friends moved on. Where? Where are they?
carries everything... So they went there, each thinking about
his own.  And only Frost smiled, because he
guessed what awaited them ahead -
di...