Retro - Insanity.

Track:  Cybertango                       
Author: Macros, 8 Jan 2001, Kotlas       
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 Сборник маразмов местных программистов  
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 (Известна точная дата написания этого   
           текста 4.12.99.) - Is it possible to make a game on Art Studio ?   
- Of course, if you write a compiler.      
                                         
- Turn off your computer quickly!!! You have
The monitor is overheated!                     
                                         
- Why are you crawling on the disk like a dead cockroach?
? Turbo while you're alive.                 
                                         
- Why is your speaker wheezing?         
- Probably caught a cold.                      
- When was the last time you lubricated it?
?                                        
                                         
- Do you think that before the Spectrum came-
solder - CD-ROM or 3D FX?               
- Why do I need  CD-ROM ? You tell me from
PENTIUM-III  attach it first, and then
let's watch...                                
                                         
- Who works on trackball?          
- Zoophile perverts.- Is paint brush cool?            
-  Certainly !!! If it weren't for histerminator
b on corel drawdrawn. And this, you know
or not...                          
- What is multimedia?              
- Just imagine: a german comes up to you -
la, just super, mmm.... so painted -
Naya...                                   
- So what?                             
- Like what?! 256 colors and 1024 shades! 
                                         
- How to connect a monitor from ibm to
Spectrum ?                              
- Only through a transformer.            
                                         
- Do you think the CD can be damaged?
hit with a magnet?                          
- Heavy - yes.                       
                                         
- Have you heard, are there such adapters?
CD-HD ?                                  
- Yes, only galvanized, plated, iron.
It crashes at once.                          
- HD ?- No, a computer.                         
                                         
- To avoid catching the virus, wear a dis-
chum salmon plastic bag...           
- You have a bomb planted in your computer!    
- (Looking at the clock) Yes, it’s overheating right now -
Xia...                                    
                                         
- Let's solder the antenna to the monitor.     
- For what ?                                
- For voltage boost!                     
                                         
 To install, click caps during
downloads.   To uninstall, click
symbol.                                  
                                         
- If is-dos is only a shell, then
where is the system?                         
-Are your hands already itching?!           
                                         
- Why is Bill Gates as happy as?... 
                                         
- How do you copy, well, how do you copy?
Just like in tr-dos'...                  
                                         
- Vano loves Jemmini. Vova lovesJemmini.
Vasya loves Jemmini. Lesha lovesJemmini.
Why does felixlike conver ?              
- Yes, he’s actually kind of different...       
                                         
- What happens if you insert the floppy disk backwards?
in advance?                                
- You can’t wash your head...                  
         //             
- Now you’re getting the floppy disk, you’re getting it. century
you will be the restaurant!                   
                                         
- Alt+Ctrl+Del doesn't help!!!           
- And you onmagic,onmagic...          
                                         
- What is the difference between the quick format  mode?    
- Well, it’s like flushing a toilet or just
wipe the rim...                       
                                         
- You reformatted the zero track for me! 
- The latch needs to be installed...- Why can’t I relax anymore?   
                                         
- Let's change the kinescope!            
- There are no bricks...                        
                                         
- Just imagine what comes to you
girl and offers a choice:
Retry, Ignore, Abort.What will you do? 
- Well, that’s actually her problem...        
                                         
- You have one eye to the left, the other doesn’t.
frame synchronization...                
                                         
- If your resistor burns out, don’t try
replace it with a jumper!                
- Why ?                               
- It won't help.                            
                                         
- Batteries cannot be recharged!        
- And you can charge it!                   
                                         
- Does your monitor have a video input?     
                                         
- What is the difference between the VHS format and the NTSC  format?    
- Well, where do you see the tape recorder here, where?! 
                                         
- What a dark phosphor you have...       
- Oh, you're a racist!!!- What is the difference between a floppy disk and a girl?     
- Silver can be re-glued...       
- It's reusable!                     
                                         
- You should at least get a cleaning disk, otherwise
everything is dry and dry...                  
                                         
- Why don’t all programs provide
rena work with drive "B"?           
- When you approach a girl, you
you only think about "A".                   
- How do you know?                
- What makes you better?!                      
                                         
- Your amplifier is hissing!               
- He'll bite right now!                           
                                         
- Do you think Sauron's parents had
children?                                   
                                         
- Something smells like something is burning here...        
- The disk must have burned...              
                                         
- Are you going to snack on floppy disks?          
                                         
- What do you have in the bottle?            
- Juice.                                   
- Orange?                         
- No, epoxy.                        
                                         
- Your fish has gone bad!- With such and such a life...                   
                                         
- The disk creaks.                          
- Shall we lubricate?                               
                                         
- If people evolved from monkeys, then from
Who did programmers come from then?      
                                         
- I recently heard that they published a book “Everything That
you would like to know about tr-dos,but were afraid
ask."                               
- So how?...                          
                                         
- From our monitors theirs are protective screens -
they won't save us!                           
                                         
- Damn it!                                
- These are viruses...                          
- Do you have an amplifier emphasizing bass or per-
dit?                                    
                                         
- Don’t you need cassettes for firewood?       
                                         
- The kinescope is cracked!                     
- With effort...                            
                                         
- What, then, does Sauron parasitize on?    
- In society.                           
- Thank God, not on ours!               
                                         
- Bill Gates arrived!                    
- Launch is-dos !                      
                                         
- What a good book! I'll go to the toilet
I'll take it away...                                 
                                         
- When did you make your first disc?    
                                         
- If you need some asm, please
Say goodbye to felix.                         
- Don’t you have one?                        
- I can’t copy...                  
- Cookies?                              
- Better. Disc!                          
                                         
- This light bulb doesn't have a hair...         
- Bald!!!                              
                                         
                                         
- Why are the aunties naked inxonix?    
- This is the job.                          
                                         
 Now, if the Spectrum had 16 megabytes
memory, how many tables could be
return...                               
                                         
- What is the serial number of your disk?    
- Made in Czechoslovakia - Who screwed"Black Raven"?  
- Felix.                                 
- A-ah... And I was really thinking, what kind of
a normal person could do this...          
                                         
- So what do you say is your nickname?
Kotsoft's ?                              
- Stupid - is he a pervert?           
- Worse.                                  
                                         
- How smart you all are.  I wish I was here
Felix...                                 
                                         
- What is interlaced scanning used for?
- For people like you.                      
                                         
- How are the wires shielded?               
- Paraffin.                             
                                         
- Can a ceramic capacitor be
polar?                               
- No.                                   
- What about a black man?                             
                                         
- Bring the saw.                             
- For what ?- We'll tune the guitar.              
                                         
- The drum is a wind instrument -
there?                                    
-  Undoubtedly  !  While you are playing it -
you'll die...                              
                                         
- Put your copyrights on the programs.   
- What if they don’t hold on?...