Track: Written in far 1999 year
Author: MS
-----------------------------------------
...Five thousand years ago our world was not
similar to what he is now.
Our planet was inhabited by creatures uniting -
joining clans. After centuries of wars, in
whose descendants, continuing the work of their great-
Dov, fought bravely not for life, but for
death, there are only two classes left on the planet
on. And they could not live in peace, just like
and continue the senseless war. Then
they decided to resort to magic and si-
loy magic to solve the eternal problem.
Then they turned to the old, but very
the wise hermit, the messenger of God
gov, the chosen necromancer Batman."I...
I can tell you - he answered - on the Great Day
Solstice we will sacrifice to the gods and
With their help, we will make the right decision."
Time passed, the day was near when
the nets will line up in one straight line, facing
chewing the letter "X". Then in the depths of the Great
the spirit cave will open for a while
entrance to the portal, through which you can
will summon the Demon of Darkness. To the one who
will go there, the lot will indicate, for that -
those who enter the portal will face a terrible
fate of becoming a victim of the Demon. Stars, under-
obeying my own, incomprehensible human
mind order, decided the fate of all life
first thing on our planet. ANDhere, in one pre-
Red Day great castrologist Nosperdamus
deduced the law of universal circumcision, according to which
Roma could calculate who sent the
turns into the portal. Nose worked day and night
perdamus over the most complex calculations, but
nothing worked. And suddenly in a dream
The star of Bethlehem appeared to him and said:
"On the seventh day you will see a bright sky
light. He will lead you to the one who is destined
but to decide the fate of the world." Then the Nose fell -
perdamus to the floor and hit his head on
your telescope. In the morning, waking up, he...
I realized that I had been unconscious for a while
more, no less - a whole week. rushed
he went to his desk, found his calculations and
realized what he was wrong about. Grabbing his
diaries, he went to the necromancer Bat-
Maine, in order to subjugate them by will to the sacred
order of time. But it is impossible to change
thread what is predicted by the stars is equal
how no mortal can interfere
fall into the eternal law of astral harmony
existence.
Fortunately, intelligence at that time worked well
sho, the local authority found out about this, half-
half-hobbit orc, crazy Sauron Jew
Kastrakhis and he volunteered to go to battle with
impostors in the name of preserving peace in
planet. This legend was passed down from
knees to the generation and those people remember
days when the fate of the world was decided by the intelligent
a creature that went down in history as... B H E R N O K N I G N I K
-----------------------
And according to the horoscope, Sauron,
you are a Jew!
Batman.
-No, no - he was delirious in his sleep, tossing and turning on his side.
on your side, little green hobbit - I don't
I want to marry you, no, no...
-How come you don’t want to marry me?
- But just like that, I don’t want to... no...
-And you will have to. You, Sauron Kastrakhis, soon
you will become a father! Well done!
-No, no...
-Cucumber!-God, no...
-Mendelssohn!
-Who else is Mendelssohn?...
-Sauron Yevreevich Kastrakhis! Do you agree?
you marry Ksyukha Green Half-Orc
and be with her until the end of my days, until
death won't you part?
-Are you crazy?! Until the end of days...
no... no...
AHHHHH! - Sauron yelled at the top of his lungs and
I realized that I woke up - Damn you all...
We need to cast... We need to cast... Sauron
gets out of bed and, having taken a step, stumbles
for something half-soft, half-hard and falls
on the floor He gets up, takes another step and advances
for something definitely soft, but in addition
It's also warm. What kind of crap he thinks
he crawls on all fours to the table.
In the twilight with your only half-
with a color-blind eye he notices
candlestick Light, light - he shouts -
light, light. Suddenly Sauron becomes clearer
consciousness and he understands that the candle, like that one,
forged, missing from the candlestick. Fuck it
with you - he thinks and presses the button
switch. The dim light flashes brightly
and the room is illuminated by infrared radiation
nim. Where is the candle - Sauron mumbles.
-Where-where? In your back.
Sauron takes a closer look and notices him lying
on the floorcurled up Frost.
Wow, that's a fucking fly - he thinks - not a damn thing
! Just some kind of crematorium. Sauron, co-
of course, I meant something related to
cryogenic technologies, but its unclear
consciousness, as always, failed. Frost, what?
what the hell are you doing here, huh?
- Yes, I came here to the taba with Moishe!
Sauron: Nevermind! How is this so? My-
Sha died seven days ago!
-Well, on the eighth day, that means I got him out-
fell
Sauron: Why?
Moroz: Yes, there’s no point in doing it.
Sauron: Just wait, don't do anything to him yet
nothing. I have a cousin here, a necro-
manta, maybe he needs something... And when-
you throw it, it’s frosty, today I had a dream about how
as if they forced me to marry you!
Frost: Hmm... Well, I'm broth... That is, pi-
polfen... I mean, I'm flattered! Wow!
Sauron tears off his half-decomposed hand
Moishi opens the chest and puts it there.
Maybe if Batman comes by later, I’ll give it to him
I'll give it back. And heI have a replacement... Wow, he is a replacement for me
replaced... In exchange for me... He will give...
will give... well, we'll see later what he gives me
will give... Brrr... It's cold. Sauron understands
Yes, that stands half-naked in one night
shirt with a cap on his head. Cold-
but damn it's a fly. Is it snowing?
Frost: Yes, winter will come soon...
Stupid, stupid - echoed loudly in
empty turnip of Sauron - stupid, stupid...
Sauron grabbed his head, which was cracking -
la after yesterday... Sauron momentarily
he closed his eyes and remembered that when he
I got out of bed and stumbled twice.
The second time - for Frost. Then why
did he stumble for the first time? Who is this?
what a semi-solid one, huh? Sauron sinks
thinks and falls asleep.
Meanwhile the sun had risen
usual place and began to water with ultraviolet
summer for all and sundry. To Sau's room
Ron the door opened and Klyukha Zele-
Naya. Seeing half naked Sauron standing
in the middle of the room on one leg with closed
eyes, she was incredibly surprised and tired
glared at him. And he still stood on one
leg and slept. A few hours later Ksyukha
I realized that Sauron was sleeping and was very angry with him
offended. She got up from the floor and directed
went to the sofa. Carelessly write for somethingHaving woken up, she loudly collapsed half on
floor, half on the sofa, then woke up
Sauron also collapsed - of course, he had
Santa is claustrophobic, and he’s afraid of heights.
They lay silently and thought about one thing: for
Why did they hesitate?... Then unexpectedly
but Sauron came up with a thought: maybe
see why we stumbled?! So he
and did so. He stood up and bowed his head
down. At the same moment Frost came in. Hmm -
Sauron thought - what kind of crap is this
like this? And then I heard Moroz: This is Sau-
Ron, I brought it for you!
Sauron: What is this?
Frost: These are shitshoes!
Sauron took a closer look - and it’s true! Before
there were excellent shitshoes lying on them. Well, save me-
Bo, Frost - filtered through in a friendly way
muzzle Sauron - I will remember you forever
! They will help us... he thought... they
help us win! Defeat the imposter
tsev!
Ksyukha: What other impostors?
Frost begins to have a fit of laughter, he...
regains his balance and plops down (oh, horror!) on
Ksyukha.
Sauron: Hey, hey, you sucker, go awayaway from mine
Ksyukha!
Moroz: What kind of Ksyukha is she to you?! lifeboat
she! Or whatever her name is...
Ksyukha sat down on the sofa and cried. Here Sau-
Ron put his hands on his belt, puffed out his stomach and
says to Frost in his childish voice: You
Why did you offend the noblewoman, death?!
-I hear from death! - Frost shouted and
hit Sauron over the head with the fact that Sauron
calls "fr-r-r fr-r-r", in one word, gi-
ray. And she and Ksyukha escaped through the secret
used under Sauron's bed.
Sauron lay delirious. It seemed to him that
Terminator, burdock in combination
government, gave him a digital tester, but
Batman came and took it away. No, no -
Sauron howled and opened his eye. Above him
the Table Service bowed, in combination
Kettle.
Sauron threw his legs in the air and tried
stand up in a jump, but he doesn’t get anything -
it started and he fell to the floor, and so
It was lucky that I landed right on the fourth
renki.
-Hey, you! Get off my hands and knees! -
Service yelled - Get out! Get out!...Sauron: Let's do this: You will be...
put on the drummers (Service continues:
Go away, go away...), we'll put the frost in prison for the bass
(The service does not stop: Demons of good
do according to your will), and I will
lo! That is solo! I'll be the soloist!
Solo!
Service: You will be the soloist! I'm coming to you
came from Batman.
Sauron: Why, did you move in with him?!
Service: Moved.
Sauron: Why?
Service: Is this humor or what?
Sauron: I admit, yes. I wanted to make a joke!
I’m so smart and I tell jokes!
Service: How about sewing in your ass-
tsu, huh?
Sauron: What did you sew for me?
The service takes out of his pocket "fr-r-r-f-r-r"
(everyone already knows what it is) and calmly
throws it onto Sauron's leg. Well not here
it was! Sauron just as calmly kicks
leg, but the weight continues to move towards the under-
sore leg.Probably magnetic! - think
small Sauron. After an hour of swinging but-
hey, Sauron tore off the last one and stuck it in
pocket Then the weight took and fell to Sauron
on the other leg. Probably with homing
I'm eating! - Sauron realized. But it doesn't hurt him
it was, since it was not a leg at all, but
prosthesis, however, like an arm and lower face
lust, and all prostheses are made from
sheet foam by rough adjustment
ki chisel.
Sauron: Let's sing!
Service: Come on!
Sauron: Kiss mi, baby, van mo time!
I won't give you my tester!
The Hobbit is an interesting game,
The graphic is almost in the frame.
Service: You are the hobbit and everything.
Ksyukha was a stick.
Two buckets of fake vodka
I brought it yesterday by boat.
Frost: Cryogenic apparatus
Sauron is a degenerate
Moishi's corpse was eaten by flies
I will give it to Ksyukha!
Ksyukha: I don’t need your goodness,
The Hobbit is the best reward! This is punishment for sins.
So that's it. Hee hee hee.
Sauron: Fuck you all, Jews,
Get out of here quickly!
Knock-knock-knock, my guitar,
To hell with you all, but we're out of luck here!
Service: We are united like diarrhea,
What Frost brought yesterday!
Sauron we are now
Let's remove the last eye!
Sauron: How can that be? After all, we are friends!
We can't strain ourselves!
Even if I'm a hobbit, even if I'm a Jew,
But at heart I’m Andrey!
Moroz: If you are Andryushka,
Who is this Ksyushka?
Service: Half-hobbit necromancer,
Single-pedestal sideboard!
Sauron: What are you talking about?
I'll do it right now... And you'll fall!
And not solo after taking a sip
You're going to suck caramel!
Service: No need to threaten me!
I was made in Khokhloma!
My composition is a big secret!
I'm mixed up with shit!Everyone (in chorus): Oh, lyu-li, oh, lu-li,
If you could see
Like Frost, Sauron and Beacon
The teapot was stolen...
They tore off his paws
The wings were cut with a saw -
We will never give up
From such a life!
(Continued in MSF_20)
And according to the horoscope, Sauron, you are a Jew! Batman. -No, no - he was delirious in his sleep, tossing and turning on his side. on your side, little green hobbit - I don't I want to marry you, no, no... -How come you don’t want to marry me? - But just like that, I don’t want to... no... -And you will have to. You, Sauron Kastrakhis, soon you will become a father! Well done! -No, no... -Cucumber!-God, no... -Mendelssohn! -Who else is Mendelssohn?... -Sauron Yevreevich Kastrakhis! Do you agree? you marry Ksyukha Green Half-Orc and be with her until the end of my days, until death won't you part? -Are you crazy?! Until the end of days... no... no... AHHHHH! - Sauron yelled at the top of his lungs and I realized that I woke up - Damn you all... We need to cast... We need to cast... Sauron gets out of bed and, having taken a step, stumbles for something half-soft, half-hard and falls on the floor He gets up, takes another step and advances for something definitely soft, but in addition It's also warm. What kind of crap he thinks he crawls on all fours to the table. In the twilight with your only half- with a color-blind eye he notices candlestick Light, light - he shouts - light, light. Suddenly Sauron becomes clearer consciousness and he understands that the candle, like that one, forged, missing from the candlestick. Fuck it with you - he thinks and presses the button switch. The dim light flashes brightly and the room is illuminated by infrared radiation nim. Where is the candle - Sauron mumbles. -Where-where? In your back. Sauron takes a closer look and notices him lying on the floorcurled up Frost. Wow, that's a fucking fly - he thinks - not a damn thing ! Just some kind of crematorium. Sauron, co- of course, I meant something related to cryogenic technologies, but its unclear consciousness, as always, failed. Frost, what? what the hell are you doing here, huh? - Yes, I came here to the taba with Moishe! Sauron: Nevermind! How is this so? My- Sha died seven days ago! -Well, on the eighth day, that means I got him out- fell Sauron: Why? Moroz: Yes, there’s no point in doing it. Sauron: Just wait, don't do anything to him yet nothing. I have a cousin here, a necro- manta, maybe he needs something... And when- you throw it, it’s frosty, today I had a dream about how as if they forced me to marry you! Frost: Hmm... Well, I'm broth... That is, pi- polfen... I mean, I'm flattered! Wow! Sauron tears off his half-decomposed hand Moishi opens the chest and puts it there. Maybe if Batman comes by later, I’ll give it to him I'll give it back. And heI have a replacement... Wow, he is a replacement for me replaced... In exchange for me... He will give... will give... well, we'll see later what he gives me will give... Brrr... It's cold. Sauron understands Yes, that stands half-naked in one night shirt with a cap on his head. Cold- but damn it's a fly. Is it snowing? Frost: Yes, winter will come soon... Stupid, stupid - echoed loudly in empty turnip of Sauron - stupid, stupid... Sauron grabbed his head, which was cracking - la after yesterday... Sauron momentarily he closed his eyes and remembered that when he I got out of bed and stumbled twice. The second time - for Frost. Then why did he stumble for the first time? Who is this? what a semi-solid one, huh? Sauron sinks thinks and falls asleep. Meanwhile the sun had risen usual place and began to water with ultraviolet summer for all and sundry. To Sau's room Ron the door opened and Klyukha Zele- Naya. Seeing half naked Sauron standing in the middle of the room on one leg with closed eyes, she was incredibly surprised and tired glared at him. And he still stood on one leg and slept. A few hours later Ksyukha I realized that Sauron was sleeping and was very angry with him offended. She got up from the floor and directed went to the sofa. Carelessly write for somethingHaving woken up, she loudly collapsed half on floor, half on the sofa, then woke up Sauron also collapsed - of course, he had Santa is claustrophobic, and he’s afraid of heights. They lay silently and thought about one thing: for Why did they hesitate?... Then unexpectedly but Sauron came up with a thought: maybe see why we stumbled?! So he and did so. He stood up and bowed his head down. At the same moment Frost came in. Hmm - Sauron thought - what kind of crap is this like this? And then I heard Moroz: This is Sau- Ron, I brought it for you! Sauron: What is this? Frost: These are shitshoes! Sauron took a closer look - and it’s true! Before there were excellent shitshoes lying on them. Well, save me- Bo, Frost - filtered through in a friendly way muzzle Sauron - I will remember you forever ! They will help us... he thought... they help us win! Defeat the imposter tsev! Ksyukha: What other impostors? Frost begins to have a fit of laughter, he... regains his balance and plops down (oh, horror!) on Ksyukha. Sauron: Hey, hey, you sucker, go awayaway from mine Ksyukha! Moroz: What kind of Ksyukha is she to you?! lifeboat she! Or whatever her name is... Ksyukha sat down on the sofa and cried. Here Sau- Ron put his hands on his belt, puffed out his stomach and says to Frost in his childish voice: You Why did you offend the noblewoman, death?! -I hear from death! - Frost shouted and hit Sauron over the head with the fact that Sauron calls "fr-r-r fr-r-r", in one word, gi- ray. And she and Ksyukha escaped through the secret used under Sauron's bed. Sauron lay delirious. It seemed to him that Terminator, burdock in combination government, gave him a digital tester, but Batman came and took it away. No, no - Sauron howled and opened his eye. Above him the Table Service bowed, in combination Kettle. Sauron threw his legs in the air and tried stand up in a jump, but he doesn’t get anything - it started and he fell to the floor, and so It was lucky that I landed right on the fourth renki. -Hey, you! Get off my hands and knees! - Service yelled - Get out! Get out!...Sauron: Let's do this: You will be... put on the drummers (Service continues: Go away, go away...), we'll put the frost in prison for the bass (The service does not stop: Demons of good do according to your will), and I will lo! That is solo! I'll be the soloist! Solo! Service: You will be the soloist! I'm coming to you came from Batman. Sauron: Why, did you move in with him?! Service: Moved. Sauron: Why? Service: Is this humor or what? Sauron: I admit, yes. I wanted to make a joke! I’m so smart and I tell jokes! Service: How about sewing in your ass- tsu, huh? Sauron: What did you sew for me? The service takes out of his pocket "fr-r-r-f-r-r" (everyone already knows what it is) and calmly throws it onto Sauron's leg. Well not here it was! Sauron just as calmly kicks leg, but the weight continues to move towards the under- sore leg.Probably magnetic! - think small Sauron. After an hour of swinging but- hey, Sauron tore off the last one and stuck it in pocket Then the weight took and fell to Sauron on the other leg. Probably with homing I'm eating! - Sauron realized. But it doesn't hurt him it was, since it was not a leg at all, but prosthesis, however, like an arm and lower face lust, and all prostheses are made from sheet foam by rough adjustment ki chisel. Sauron: Let's sing! Service: Come on! Sauron: Kiss mi, baby, van mo time! I won't give you my tester! The Hobbit is an interesting game, The graphic is almost in the frame. Service: You are the hobbit and everything. Ksyukha was a stick. Two buckets of fake vodka I brought it yesterday by boat. Frost: Cryogenic apparatus Sauron is a degenerate Moishi's corpse was eaten by flies I will give it to Ksyukha! Ksyukha: I don’t need your goodness, The Hobbit is the best reward! This is punishment for sins. So that's it. Hee hee hee. Sauron: Fuck you all, Jews, Get out of here quickly! Knock-knock-knock, my guitar, To hell with you all, but we're out of luck here! Service: We are united like diarrhea, What Frost brought yesterday! Sauron we are now Let's remove the last eye! Sauron: How can that be? After all, we are friends! We can't strain ourselves! Even if I'm a hobbit, even if I'm a Jew, But at heart I’m Andrey! Moroz: If you are Andryushka, Who is this Ksyushka? Service: Half-hobbit necromancer, Single-pedestal sideboard! Sauron: What are you talking about? I'll do it right now... And you'll fall! And not solo after taking a sip You're going to suck caramel! Service: No need to threaten me! I was made in Khokhloma! My composition is a big secret! I'm mixed up with shit!Everyone (in chorus): Oh, lyu-li, oh, lu-li, If you could see Like Frost, Sauron and Beacon The teapot was stolen... They tore off his paws The wings were cut with a saw - We will never give up From such a life! (Continued in MSF_20)
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