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Adventurer #07
31 января 1998 |
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Ottyag - What is a complete freak.
(C) BNR of Extacy-3
(C) Fedorov, "Chasm" Vladimir - translation
Who is a complete freak?
Hi! You're a freak? Similarly, no? Or maybe all the same
huh? Below you will find some fad that characterize ugly types.
I hope you did not do so ... Oh, and if you are not sure that
you're not a freak, then look for your name on this list.
BNR of Extacy-3
BNR of XTC-3
BNR of E-3
Fook of TitsOot (BNR of Extacy-3)
End of list
So let's begin. Ugly types ...
1. Until now, playing board games,
type of snake-ladder.
2. Playing with a toy house, in which
torus is a toy Speccy +3, u
rushechnaya Amiga 1200 and can be something
another.
3. Have the certificate in five of Botany
ke (hm. .. nerd).
4. Do not have a job, money, etc.
5. Have a bunch of shirts Guns'n'Roses, though
hate these most Guns'n'Roses.
6. Love adulterated "Zhigulevskoe.
7. Join the steep spectrum
movskoy commands, and with the lamer
exist for two years.
8. Constantly asking to catch bugs in the free
their prog.
9. Have a nickname ... soft, and at the same time
do not write a single program.
10.Lyubyat listen to the song of the peacock.
11.Lyubyat listening posts "Laskovgo May" and
"Mirage", a decade ago.
12.Vyhodyat of the train, not on its residual
formulation.
13.Lyubyat number 13.
14.Takzhe like number 4.096.
15.Imeyut periodic system Mendele
Eva on the wall.
16.Imeyut 23'h year old brother, who
constantly grumbling, lives with his mom,
never had a woman who has a bunch of
porn magazines (I wonder why) and
moreover, often farts.
17.Vtiharya Fingering videos Ally Poo
Gachev.
18.Blya ...
19.Pishut "shit ..." in the articles.
20.Dumayut that they can kodit, moreover, to
rather vague idea that things
em command LD A, 69!
21.Do still like to indulge quarantine
dashom in children's coloring book.
22.Reshayut go to the Central Department Store,
ischya place, somewhere to fuck with her
girlfriend.
22.Ne can count more than before 22'h.
22.Nazyvayut his mother "WOMAN"!
22.Govoryat people: "Beware of wet
Camping in bed! "
22.Pokazyvayut middle finger to himself,
when they lose a cigarette.
22.Pokazyvayut middle finger to himself,
when they lose a lighter.
22.Mogut loose cigarette and lighter in
their own bedroom.
22.Byvayut dumb ass.
22.Chto something I will ship it all.
22.Dumayu that I wrote here the full
hrenotu.
22.I I CAN NOT FIND MY FUCKING ignition
GALKA!
22.Ne find their zazhigalu after decade
minutes searching for this damn shtu
Covina.
22.Prodolzhayut look, lit from the ignition
Jackdaws other.
22.Nahodyat it under a magazine (MEMBERS
of course).
22.Teryayut it again.
22.Nahodyat in his pocket.
22.Nabivayut page size (in Kilaha)
no longer than his penis (in the Santee
meters), and he is such a ma-and-scarlet!
22.Oh! Fucking text.
end
22.Pishut "end", even though they know that yet
write something.
22.FUCK OFF.
end
22.Opyat write "the end" ...
22.Nu OK, enough. Fuck off.
Well, now tekstik, courtesy of Condor 'om.
Rules of conduct in the forest reserve
"Paradise tent":
1) The reserve is a pristine forest caring hands
size of 7.5 to 40 meters.
2) Move the forest can only be
small groups of 20-25 people. Circular motion, clockwise, arms
behind the head.
3) At the command of the instructor: "Come on!"
tourist is obliged to pursue the collection of gifts
forest, guided by a scheme in which
indicated the exact location.
When it detects an object, the tourist has
the right to stand next to the rubber mat and
giving a visual signal flag, signal the voice: "Fruit!" or
"Forest gift!" waiting approach the instructor. Came to the
rescue instructor, depending on the degree of edibility command
object: "Foo! Zamay No!" or "Ahti" Tally-ho-ho! " - Collecting
means lying down or kneeling.
Upon completion of the collected walk models of mushrooms
and berries are placed in their original positions to collect
their subsequent groups.
4) Exotic:
a) The Nightingale.
b) A sparrow.
c) Ant.
d) Dorofei.
In marked conifer stumps provides remote control with
buttons, 1-4, by clicking which you can claim, respectively:
a) The singing nightingale
b) Singing sparrow
c) The emergence of the ant (moving model
increased by 500 times)
d) the appearance of a forester Dorofei in clothing
prosperous Bavarian peasant
2 nd half of 18 century (actor Nikolai
sky).
Choral singing of a nightingale, an ant, a sparrow and
Dorofei by concomitant fixation of all four buttons.
5) In our Reserve tourists await next HAZARDS:
a) A bite of midges (for fans of acute oschu
perturbations): To bite work, it is necessary
necessary to roll up our sleeves to the elbow and wat
Coy, soaked in alcohol, wipe
area of the skin, intended for in
expressions hungry parasite. Sterile
nym tweezers duty nurse spe-
cialists (actor Mikolsky) lack of
jars and provides contact population
komogo - recipients treated with
plot tormented flesh with subsequent
ing examination and stationary
monitored for 6 years.
b) The Cracker "Wildfire": the careless
Mr. stepping on a limb (a) or under
rozhnik (d) suddenly erupts
strong forest fire. Accurate simulation
it is achieved by alternately flashing
eat two red lights at 40 watts,
sounding a siren volume of 600 de
tsibell and the appearance of fire garni
zone with simultaneous release of solid
layer of foam height of 2 m 10 cm
throughout the forest.
c) "Surprise. Meeting with small predator":
for surprise is necessary to
Eve to apply to the administration and
make an additional payment by
following which lie low and wait for the night.
After 4.5 hours at dawn, the waiter
make crab salad.
d) "Meeting with the big predators: for the
same amount will himself head waiter (ap
TIST Mikolsky).
6) Introduction to the folk customs and
lyricism of native wildlife:
a) "Thoughtful chewing a blade of grass": I wish
ing lined up barefoot on the rise.
To the "One!" Tourists fall on
back to the "Two!" - Potyayayanuuu
were, cast the right hands behind his head,
"Three" - began the same pensive
vaniyu green mass issued from
calculation 1,5-2 quintal per group.
b) work as lumberjacks and competition with
Canadian lumberjack (actor Nikolai
sky): There are given axes, pi
ly, jig saws, soldering irons, body Be
leagues and a pint of ale. After which a shirt
rashristyvayutsya shoulders razzuzhivayutsya,
chop wood, chips fly.
c) Combined Attraction - Session
"Backwoods, but the grace of God":
Group walking is put into the bushes,
where suddenly starts working the spin
Sledge jet ("Forest
wilderness "). After 1,5 hours drive from
cluded - there comes the "God's blessing
give. "
d) People gulbischa (games, picnics,
seyshn, hangouts): played a prominent
embroidered lace breeches, boots
boiled, boots in the bag, kokoshni
ki, overhead eggs, powdered wigs and
oxygen masks. Need to quickly put
all that give, to stamp twice but
On the other, take hold of the ear lobe, spit and
say: "Keep off me, mind you!".
Winner - benzohleborezka (Ura!).
7) In case of injury (corn, bruise, bedsores,
food poisoning, torn, punctured wound,
crossbow, as well as intentional self-injury to the premature
departure of of the reserve) should take a horizontal position,
to moisten the wound with saliva or impose moss on the
perimeter, waiting for the formation of mold and curative
stealth techs arrival of the forest.
There are also special paths for walking barefoot - as
pedestrians, and equestrian.
There are also spectacular attractions
"Bathing the Red Horse (Artist Mikolsky)," Singing in the fire
and festivities with the girls, "" Gathering of medicinal
herbs, "" Civilization begins "and" Defloration timber thereof.
"
On leaving the reserve do not forget
pass the official mask, waders, a rug and a bathing cap horse.
Note: The reserve is based Society for the Protection of
stamps depicting argali mountain and patrolled by helicopter
detachment of young arharovtsev to 600 people.
We wish you a pleasant stay in our
Reserve!
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