01 апреля 2001

          Han/Good Guys H. G. & Craker/Good Guys H. G.

                     Translated by Chasm/CPU

                       Are You A Communist?

This  test was  written in  Russia for  testing  people  to find
hidden communists.  Choose an  answer, (a-d),  for each question
and remember it. After the test you can count up your points and
see if you're a communist or not.

1. Here we go to:
  
  a) other way  
  b) highway  
  c) Broadway  
  d) birthday

2. The worker's and  peasant's revolution about the  necessarity
   of which always said the bolsheviks:
  
  a) it failed
  b) you can laugh but it still happened
  c) it happened
  d) it will happen on the 19th of august 2000 in St. Petersburg

3. Decembrists awakened Hercen. Hercen developed:
  
  a) revolutionary propaganda
  b) socialist competition
  c) sports competition
  d) an attack on Berlin at 1945 year

4. Stalin, after he was chosen as a communist leader, had in his
   hands:

  a) may flower
  b) absolute power
  c) comrade Krupskaya
  d) handle-bar

5. Trade-union is the school of:

  a) Moskow city
  b) communism
  c) fascism
  d) narcissism

6. From all the arts one of the most importance is:

  a) cinema 
  b) theatre
  c) vine drinking
  d) bone carving

7. Communist party is intellect, honour and conscience of:

  a) your epoch
  b) our epoch
  c) small glacial period
  d) epoch of great geographical discoveries

8. Give us an organization of revolutionaries and we'll invert:

  a) a truck
  b) Russia
  c) monument to Nicolay II
  d) a coffee-pot

9. Take  all  farms,    all  mills  away  from   landowners  and
   capitalists and organize:

  a) a party for communist leaders for 700 people
  b) British-Soviet friendship society
  c) socialist community
  d) hockey tournament for the prize of newspaper "Izvestiya"

10. The Karl Marx's theory is powerful, because of:

  a) Marx's
  b) it's right
  c) it maybe right
  d) it's a fright

                         Points:

  1. a)  100 Points              6. a) 100 Points
     b)  10   - " -                 b) 10   - " -
     c)  0    - " -                 c) 0    - " -
     d)  3    - " -                 d) 1    - " -

  2. a)  0    - " -              7. a)  10  - " -
     b)  10   - " -                 b)  100 - " -
     c)  100  - " -                 c)  2   - " -
     d)  3    - " -                 d)  0   - " -

  3. a)  100  - " -              8. a)  2   - " -
     b)  10   - " -                 b)  100 - " -
     c)  0    - " -                 c)  10  - " -
     d)  2    - " -                 d)  0   - " -

  4. a)  10   - " -              9. a)  0   - " -
     b)  100  - " -                 b)  10  - " -
     c)  0    - " -                 c)  100 - " -
     d)  1    - " -                 d)  2   - " -

  5. a)  2    - " -             10. a)  1   - " -
     b)  100  - " -                 b)  100 - " -
     c)  10   - " -                 c)  10  - " -
     d)  0    - " -                 d)  0   - " -
                      
Your score:

0 - Congratulations! You're not a communist!!!

43 - I scored for 43 but I'm not a communist - you are also  not
a communist.

43 -  99 -  Maybe you  learn communistic  theory and  history of
world communism in  college or chose  your answer at  random and
you're unlucky.

100 - 999 - You are a complete communist. You organize communist
manifestation  every  7'th  november  and  now  sit  on computer
wearing red tie. Sir ... oops... comrade - you 100% communist.

1000 - Are you Lenin???