Subliminal Extacy #00
01 января 1994

Do Your Friends Like You?

Do Your Friends Like You?
              >>>>> Do Your Friends Like You? <<<<<             
                                                                
           -= By BlackStar Of CryptoBurners (Amiga) =-          
                                                                
               -+ Converted Onto Speccy By L.A. +-              
                                                                
This is what you've been waiting for. Are you being respected   
by your friends or do they look at you as if you are a social   
disease? Here's your ultimate chance to find out!               
                                                                
The progress of the test is easy to understand. To every        
question there are three alternatives. Just note your           
selected alternatives (A,B or C) on a piece of paper and check  
out your score at the end of this article. It's as simple as    
that.... And don't bother to cheat, ok? You'll just kid         
yourself anyway.                                                
                                                                
1. One of your friends has the house for himself for the weekend
   and he invites you to a party.  What do you say?             
                                                                
A) I have no friends...                                         
B) Sorry, I've got some homework to do and i have to code an    
   Intro.                                                       
C) Yeah man, count me in!                                       
                                                                
2. You are at the party and see this unbelieveably sexy girl.   
   What's your first thought?                                   
                                                                
A) She probably has a boyfriend.  Naah!                         
B) Oh man, I'd love to fuck the shit out of her, too bad I have 
   a girl.                                                      
C) Wow!  She's cute.  I wonder if she likes me?                 
                                                                
3. You are at the same party.  The same girl asks you to dance. 
   What do you say?                                             
                                                                
A) Sure thing, babe.                                            
B) Me?  Really?  Well, yes...  I think...                       
c) MBLFG OLKMFFF (Blush)                                        
                                                                
4. You are dancing with the (same) girl.  You get the impression
   that she wants you.  She's certainly pressing her body       
   against yours.  What do you think (and do)?                  
                                                                
A) Say "Excuse me, I need to go to the bathroom" and have a     
   quick wank.                                                  
B) You are embarrased by your hard-on and try not to make her   
   notice.                                                      
C) You press your body hard against hers, making sure she really
   feels your hard-on and kiss her.                             
                                                                
5. The same girl whispers in your ear: "I want you!"            
   What do you say?                                             
                                                                
A) Nothing, you're too embarrased to speak after you came in    
   your pants.                                                  
B) You say "Your place or mine?"                                
C) "Do you have AIDS?", you ask.                                
                                                                
6. You're on your way home to your place.  You're driving.  She 
   puts her hand on your thigh and starts to caress the inner   
   part, closer and closer to your willy...                     
                                                                
A) You close your eyes with pleasure and are amazed you can't   
   open them again, coz they're squashed by a huge bus...       
B) You come again in your pants.....                            
C) You say "Since you've started, why don't you bend down and   
   suck me!"                                                    
                                                                
7. You get home and your parents are in the living room.  What  
   do you do?                                                   
                                                                
A) You introduce the girl to them.                              
B) You lie to them and say she's going to help you with your    
   homework.  (A lie they don't buy as she wears make-up and a  
   very sexy dress.                                             
C) You just go to your room since you have told your parents you
   might bring a girl, and hang a "DO NOT DISTURB" - sign on    
   your door.                                                   
                                                                
8. She says she's on the pill.  What do you do?                 
                                                                
A) Wear a rubber anyway, to prevent getting infected.           
B) You Shut up, rip her clothes off and fuck her.               
C) "Why?", you ask!                                             
                                                                
9. The next day you're at school, your friends ask you why you  
   left so early.  What do you say?                             
                                                                
A) You tell them what happened, and they don't believe you.     
B) You tell them what happened, and they all go "WOW!".         
C) You blush and say nothing!                                   
                                                                
10. You get a letter from the girl and she says she had AIDS    
    when you fucked her.                                        
                                                                
A) You think it's joke, so you give a damn and fuck 300 other   
   girls. - And die of AIDS 3 months later.                     
B) You wore a condom, so you're safe...  You think..  You die of
   AIDS 3 weeks later. There was a hole in your condom, and you 
   didn't notice....                                            
C) You read the next page of your letter and discover it was    
   joke.  She just wants another screw...                       
                                                                
                                                                
                             RATINGS                            
                             -------                            
                                                                
1. A) -100 Points                  6. A)    1 --""--            
   B)    5 --""--                     B)    0 --""--            
   C)    1 --""--                     C)    5 --""--            
                                                                
2. A)    5 --""--                  7. A)    3 --""--            
   B)    0 --""--                     B)    0 --""--            
   C)   -3 --""--                     C)    5 --""--            
                                                                
3. A)    5 --""--                  8. A)    4 --""--            
   B)    0 --""--                     B)    5 --""--            
   C)   -3 --""--                     C)   -1 --""--            
                                                                
4. A)    0 --""--                  9. A)    1 --""--            
   B)   -1 --""--                     B)    5 --""--            
   C)    5 --""--                     C)   -2 --""--            
                                                                
5. A)   -3 --""--                 10. A)    3 --""--            
   B)    0 --""--                     B)    1 --""--            
   C)    5 --""--                     C)    8 --""--            
                                                                
                                                                
                           YOUR SCORE                           
                           ----------                           
                                                                
                              50 =>                             
                                                                
Yeah man, you're a fucking  casanova.    Your  friends  will  do
anything to be as popular as you are.  Keep it going  but  don't
get AIDS!                                                       
                                                                
                              40-49                             
                                                                
Not bad, but you've still got a little to learn though.    Don't
let your dick get out of practice, though.                      
                                                                
                              30-39                             
                                                                
Hmmm. You've got much to learn dude.  Stay swingin' though,  you
might just get there ....                                       
                                                                
                              20-29                             
                                                                
You are either under 16 or very sad...                          
                                                                
                              10-19                             
                                                                
You are under 16 and very miserable...                          
                                                                
                               0-9                              
                                                                
Fuck you, you're homosexual.                                    
                                                                
                              => 0                              
                                                                
Go kill yourself.  You have no friends.                         
                                                                
                                                                
                                                                
                                                                
                                                            End. 



Другие статьи номера:

How To Use Subliminal Extacy Disk-Mag

Editorial

How To Contribute To Subliminal Extacy

IMPORTANT!

A Message To PD Libraries

Do Your Friends Like You?

Are You A Speccy Freak?

+D and Multiface Protection

Things To Avoid Saying When Drunk

Silly Jokes Time!

Poetry Corner

Strange But True!

Do You Suffer From Loss Of Memory?

Have You Any Friends?

Change Of Plan

Last Friday Night

The Mummy's Curse

What Next?

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The End Is Near


Темы: Игры, Программное обеспечение, Пресса, Аппаратное обеспечение, Сеть, Демосцена, Люди, Программирование

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