Subliminal Extacy
#00
01 января 1994 |
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Things To Avoid Saying When Drunk
>>>>> Things To Avoid Saying When Drunk <<<<< -= By Gwi Of Extacy-3 =- It's always the same, you wake up with an absolute donkey of a hangover, and slowly and surely as your very fragile head begins to remember the night before, here are some of the things you hope you never said or done! 01: I'd shag your sister. 02: Was that your mother I saw you in town with? 03: The more I drink, the better looking you get! 04: Do not start indefinite theory conversations like "Is your brain infinite or is there a limit to what you can learn or remember?" as this makes everyone try to think, and being drunk you and you're friends can't quite manage a structured debate, and so convey their frustration as violence, usually towards each other, and then toward you for starting it. 05: It is not a good idea to put a 2p in a condom and then drop it in your mates guinness and then wait beside him and laugh when he finishes his pint. 06: Be Sick. 07: Be sick over the balcony onto the dance floor. 08: After leaving the club, avoid going to the chippy with the express intention of starting a curry/gravy/chip fight and generally abusing the girls behind the counter. 09: If dining in a stationary car, it is not a good idea to shout verbal abuse at people through the window. Just because you don't know them, it doesn't stop them from reaching in and punching you violently in the face! Lastly the following things are best not said in a group situation. 10: I wish I could get a stiffy! 11: I had the most amazing wank last night! 12: Look boy's I'm sorry I wank, I'm a wanker, just wanted to get that straight! (All of the above can lead to you walking home alone, and not getting anywhere near a taxi). I'm only guilty of a few of these, but when all's said and done, it's been a good night regardless if you wake up with your arms around a traffic cone! End.
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