Rants & Raves - How to get on the train with forged tickets.

<b>Rants & Raves</b> - How to get on the train with forged tickets.

(C) Paracels

- [Prologue ]---------------------------------------------- 
------    For all the time in our parting prodolzhitegnoy 
interesting material for my column is not accumulated as much 
as we would like. But for this, something remarkable, the 
numbers, I still found a couple of amusing to those deserving 
of your attention. 

   Ready? Then went ...
-------------------------------------------------- -------------

                         Part I.


   Have you ever rode a train with forged tickets?
No? I am too. But our friends from the famous city of Vladimir
this is nevpervoy. As a whole such actions could be called 
illegal, but then the pockets have not bottomless, and the 
money we have do not know how to draw. But the scanner and 
printer to cope with it just wonderful (no, not the money of 
course draw and tickets). I to himself to ride on feykovomu 
ticket, but do this to me, firstly, does not allow a conscience 
and, secondly, the absence of the above devices nearby. In 
Sat'a and Snake'a (it's the name of Vladimir our friends (these 
names in order not call conspiracy; 8)), this process is 
technically already delivered at a high enough level. This fact 
allows them to often come to visit us, what we are always 
happy. So, in late January for us in the carpet came Sat, Snake 
and who would have thought, M.M.A!!! (More about this in 
Section *******). They drove from Vladimir on a commuter train 
Vladimir-Carpet. Snake was going to feykovym ticket, he's the 
told me that black-comic story. I only allow myself peresskazat 
her all the rules of Hollywood thrillers. 


                ... Nobody knows his own doom ...


   Nor that no signs of trouble when, in one recent January 
morning, the trio of brave scenery left with Vladimir railway 
station in the direction of all the already known (in the 
narrow circles) c00l city called Carpet. The names of these 
characters certainly are etched in the history of the Spectrum, 
but today the talk is not about it.


   Snake, was driving on the production of the ticket In very 
Vladimir quality inkjet printer. Until then, until the time 
everything was going pretty smoothly until Sat did not start 
with an activity of the working-striker search at least some 
miscalculation of Vladimir clandestine printers (Their name for 
privacy also fails to show). And would not know world of this 
pathetic story, give up Sat from his thankless job. The benefit 
is not such a person Sat - so if for anything will undertake ...


   Lies before me this ill-fated ticket left Snake '
om the memory, as well as evidence
my words. Look ... and do not see anything unusual. And you?



                      GORKOVSKAYA Railway

                      ST. VLADIMIR

                         00000540.60

                      BPMF 00006335 1

                      AREA 00 K0000


                      26-JAN-98 07.30

                       TICKET N 011551

                       PAUL 00 <> 07

                      PRICE: **** 16.80 *

                      (FISK)



   So looks like this same ticket. Well, found something 
suspicious? No? Then remember what year and look on the ticket 
again. Now a guess? Right! The ticket generally could not be 
printed on Jan. 26, 1999-the year! And if you think logically, 
January 26, 1999, the year he was exactly 1 year!


   Now imagine the scene: the triumphant Sat, depressed Snake 
and watching with interest all going UnBel! Ever ... The most 
comical and at the same time, the tragic scene itself just hard 
to imagine. But all that was! 

   According to the laws of Murphy in the car entered the 
controllers ... That in this time chustvoval Snake? Probably 
filled his hatred to Sat'u;)). Almost time for "W" ... The 
controller came to cultural seated young people and also the 
cultural (that vrochem less maybe) asked them to show their 
tickets. Snake has already said goodbye to their lives, Sat 
bloodthirsty rubbed his hands, UnBel! Ever the same 
sochustvenno looked at Snake'a, dudaya that sees him at the 
last again ... Sat craved blood% -), but his dreams were not 
destined to true. Snake otdal controller to your ticket, and 
what was his surprise when a pretty woman with a punch, with a 
minute turned his ticket in his hands, high-speed motion 
pierced him, and gave shocked by this act Snake'u that already 
mentally prepared myself to life in prison ') 

   Actually, the etoi could and to finish this exciting
history. But no! To somehow reassure you, it is worth adding 
that the entire trio successfully reached our headquarters and 
with ulubkami on their faces told him about this instructive 
case. 

   However, the story of the ticket, some time later, found
its no less shocking Continued ... The second part of this 
horror movie read after a commercial break. 

- [Advertisement 
]---------------------------------------------- -! commercials 
dedicated cruise strips "Grey Neck"! 
-------------------------------------------------- 
------------- 

                         Part II.


                              Russia, in 1999, mankind

                           still alive, no wars between people

                           and intelligent computer does not and

                           expected.

                              In this idyllic and there are our

                           the main characters ...


             SAT ... as a mad ticket controller 'owner

             SNAKE ... as an unfortune ticket owner


   February 20. Venue - carpets, the headquarters of Eternity
Industry. Kstrechey overjoyed with the D-Man'om Sat and Snake o 
chemto say. Suddenly, in the hands of ticket Snake'a appears 
suburban electric trains Vladimir-Carpet-Vyazniki. Its 
authenticity is highly questionable. Nothing unsuspecting D-Man 
in order time something quietly copying Sat'u.


   - Here they are, the tickets! - Said Snake. - It seems that 
everything is normal. A number of something though right? 
What's the date? .. 

   The answer, from which Snake learned that the date is 
printed correctly, followed immediately. But something seems 
not Snack gave the rest, so he continued his studies.

And suggest you do this thrilling action - not regret it!


                      GORKOVSKAYA Railway

                      ST. VLADIMIR

                         00000540.60

                      BPMF 00006335 1

                      AREA 00 K0000


                      20-NOV-99 07.30

                       TICKET N 011554

                       PAUL 00 <> 07

                      PRICE: **** 16.80 *

                      (FISK)



   Well, how's tricks, my dear, Sherlock Holmes, Poirot, 
Maigret and the Other? If your search does not uvenchalis 
success, be prepared to shock (although not insulin) ... You 
are, I suppose, have rushed to look for a flaw not a date, but 
in something else, hoping for that too, this time with a date 
no problem. However, I hasten to disappoint you: it was a date! 
"How so?" - Ask You. And that's it! Do not believe me? Then 
read the first sentence of the first paragraph of the second 
part of this thriller (that immediately after the list of main 
characters). And now look what month is on the ticket ... So, 
after detecting such a slip Snake had nearly died in a fit of 
uncontrollable hysterical laughter falling off the chair. And 
it was from anything! 

   Rare ticket, which I left Sat, again lies in front
me. Want to see this historical monument? Then join us. Image 
of charge, by taxi (fee = $ 5, 8)) 

   And they say: "Miracles do not happen!" And how come! 
Confirmation of this fact: with this ticket Snake absolutely 
calm came in the carpet; controller, carried out in its hole, 
did not notice anything! However, history is silent about how 
two of Vladimir hero returned home, was not whether they have 
problems with repetitive control tickets, whether they are 
alive? .. 

   Thus here, my dear readers! What there Copperfield
when an ordinary Russian guy from Vladimir hinterland, so
impunity and masterly obdanyvaet all controllers! We wish
should he continue to stay out! Snake, we are with you!

   In general, Sat 'Snake - otlichnye guys, great coder and
Artist (respectively), and just good friends all Eternity! Do 
not judge them severely, ok? After such a heroic (and lack of 
self-preservation instinct) can only envy! 

   It's all over!

- [Post scriptum ]--------------------------------------------- 
- The author expresses his deep gratitude and Sat'u Snake'u. It 
thanks to them that the publication of this article was in many 
ways as possible. Additional thanks to D-Man'u, from whose 
words were written The second part of this thriller.

- [Post post scriptum 
]------------------------------------------ At this currently 
known for certain that Sat 'Snake blagopopoluchno got home 
(except I could see them alive at all recently?) / 30-Mar-99 /

-------------------------------------------------- -------------

   You've probably already thought it all? But no. I promised
You two themes, then there will be two. And here it is - the 
second. Meet ... 


    Article Daniel'a "Industry eternal ruleza" from Deja Vu # 7

                         DEDICATED!


   I knew that would have to continue his research in the field 
of misspelling the name of our group started in Buzz 16. This 
time serves as a source journal Deja Vu and friendly group 
PlayGear (think correctly configured). 

   Exhausting in the last issue Buzz'a all possible 
combinations, I I really do not hope to find something 
kontseputalno new, but not, apparently, in vain. And what was 
my joy when the article Daniel'a entitled "Industry eternal 
ruleza" I saw my dear heart Iternity Industry. Honestly, would 
never have thought that you could write! It turns out that even 
a few times row, which, in fact, did Daniel. But this is not

everything. What happened next, I was just shocked - until I
was funny! Many must have already know that Eternity Industry 
abbreviated written as EI. So it is, but just do not for 
Daniel'a. In this regard, it is simply a revolution. Yes! For 
as different can be called that in the opinion of Daniel'a and 
is an abbreviation of our group. Dogataytes, as he wrote it. 
Think II? And here and there - IE!!! % -} And, if you think 
logically, no we do not Eternity Industry and not even Iterfity 
Industry, a very real Iternity Endustry. Obtained as follows.


   However, despite all this, we do not take offense and take 
the apology to us in this article a few incorrect analysis of 
our demos "The 5th Element", even if it is in such an unusual 
sight! With any case. But I'm still gnawing curiosity. Dear, 
Daniel! Dear PlayGear! Be so kind - please explain: in what 
condition should be that a few times wrong to write two simple 
words and two simple letters and as well as in such a state can 
enter, ok? Thank you in advance. 

   In conclusion, I wish you success and all the best. Waiting
Deja Vu # 8.


   But you in the appendage, dear readers, a couple of examples 
of how not to write Eternity Industry, but our friends continue 
to write like this (the most buzz is highlighted in capital 
letters): 


                       eZernity industry

            (Probably the authors simply prikolnulis)

                       eNternity industry

                 (Not classifiable)

                       eterLOBY industry

                    (What is this all about??)


   Do not think that we all have thought up. It
because some people send us greetings!


   It was, it seems that something else, but I could not 
remember where. 
-------------------------------------------------- 
------------- 

   At this my Rants' Raves came to an end. More uvididsya!


                                         Sincerely, Alexander.