Odyssey Magazine #02
14 июля 1997 |
|
a rest - Short Story "Cheburashka".
Cheburashka _________ BY STEPANOV SERGE 'CO. SCHOOL N287 - MPEI 1991 - 1992. Music by Shov PART I. Chapter One. Prologue. Cheburashka was driving a green Volkswagen in Braytenshtrasse-5. It was spring. His large ears blowing breeze. But despite it all his thoughts were busy thoughts about the "frog". "The Frogs" are the secret association of neo-fascists in Southern Uganda, which soon should send a batch of novocaine because of the Southern Urals. These machinations involved in Gal. At this time in the ports of Southern California periodically pop up crocodile Gena, downloading at their side detachments of recruits from Kolobkova family. Rigorous course on north-west (toward the Limpopo (part Persian Gulf)) flew Old Hottabych, waging illegal surveillance loading Genes (k Gennady Gennadievich direct relationship does not have (prim.avt.)): "How where are they? "- Cheburashka thought wistfully, listening as the machine whistling fragments of Soviet bombs, there is SJM bursting with melodic bang. But here's a car stopped near the small five-storey mansion, where the headquarters, which was headed by Gal. Cheburashka, carefully disguised paper airplane, crept to the sixth floor and fell with a crash at Galya, who hung a portrait of Hitler on the wall. - Excuse me, Fraulein - gallantly bowing sharknuv and ears on the floor said Cheburashka, immediately said to himself: "A floor is not washed since last month ..." Then erasing with his left foot savory spit, added: "And yesterday, was again and again Toby Drunk. "He was not jealous Galia. He was just a pity that the pretty girl, has controlled such cases. "Such a cutie disappears in the clutches of this dog ... " Gal got off the table. - Sit down, pal, maybe a smoke? - She took out from his back pocket firm cap perfect Havana cigar and handed Cheburashka. So she usually began particularly important cases. Cheburashka and lit a cigarette, lost in smoke, plunged into memories. Galya was silent. She never spoke before the agent has finished smoking. Cheburashka knew that at this time in Southern California ended in the port of loading of the crocodile Genes, and that in a few days, he will be in Berlin. - Are you asleep? - Galia shook him by the ears, Cheburashka and, swallowing a cigarette butt (bad habit, acquired in one of the special forces), stupidly staring at Atamansha. - The well-known channels - beginning Galya - we learned that gibus commando landed on the Taimyr Peninsula, in order to prevent early to execute our plan for the extraction of raw materials there and dispatch it to the Urals. Gibus worked for Soviet intelligence about eleven years, but without success. This helped her Old Hottabych and superspy Piggy and Stepashka. Cheburashka sadly digested this information, then dig a bayonet-knife neproglotivshiysya piece of cigars, said: - What do you want from me, Fraulein? - You must notify the Gene to He floated to Berlin as sparingly as possible. - But how? - This will help you Chandra - she snapped her fingers. Leo entered the room, which in the fourth management called "Thunder-Chandra. He chewed on a tomato, but Seeing the portrait on the wall, he was shouting "Heil Hitler "threw his hand forward, and the unfortunate crash of the ripe vegetables drawn Hitler's mustache, which looked reproachfully at Lion. Tomato juice dripped from his portrait fun Gale and dripped over the collar. - Excuse me, Fraulein - with debility Chandra said, a smile - I did not mean to offend you ... That is Hitler ... and you and the Fuhrer, I mean ... - Look! - Galia interrupted his thoughts, and seizing Cheburashka's ears, threw in the face with Chandra. - Well, - sounded disappointed Lion in the hallway - you her whole soul, and it is you that body. He pulled out a mane Cheburashka and comfortably taking his hind leg, started in end of the corridor. "That's - thinking Cheburashka in flight - as always: all my fault ... "He hit the lodge a shovel and lost consciousness. Chapter Two. Gene swam in the ocean measured overarm. Balls on his back were playing whist and heavily misused. Gena suddenly heard the sound of the propeller and just in case pretended to be an American battleship. But this was only Carlson, who, disguised as a spy satellite, handed him a telegram from Chandra. Gene ripped the package and read the encrypted text: "There was a grandmother gray goat." - Damn! - Gene said, again this old woman trying to stop us! Then he added, referring to kolobok: - Guys, dive! Depth was small - about two hundred and fifty feet, and balls began to sing military song "We're from the grandmothers are gone! .." - Quiet, small fry! - Shouted at them Gene, knowing that somewhere nearby should be the Nautilus General CIA Nemo. All went well, except that one day they scared aunt Tortilla, which under the guise of neutral mine plied the Atlantic Ocean. After thirty-six hours Gena surfaced in the bathroom Headquarters Ghali. His first noticed Chandra, who, hidden from the Tobique, Lacan whiskey. - Healthy, Green! - Happily he cried, and crawled to kiss, but pulled back Gene. - Fraulein at home? - Yes, but it has now Cheburashka. - I have this Cheburashka - roared Gene ears the feet of the tie! - He was raging, so that balls are a bit stale. Gene into the room without his coat Ghali, and bibs, as he had taken, and just like that. Cheburashka was sitting on his lap Ghali, and she bandaged his head. His found only an hour ago, after a basketball shot thugs, Chandra had to lain nearly a half days at the lodge with a shovel. Gene, seeing that nothing terrible is a little calmer. - Gene Herr - Galya said, scratching Cheburashka behind the ear - with your usual greeting? - Bai, fyurerchik! - Gene graciously sent Hitler, a kiss, from which portrait of tears. - A cynic and a vandal ... - Muttered Galya - Reported! Instead of answering, Gene took from pocket of the three volumes of the Great Soviet Encyclopedia and buhnul them on the table Ghali, pinched while the right ear of Cheburashka, which filthy curses erupted in Genes address. - Do you ears on the table does not scatter! - Gene snapped. - Relax! - Galya said Cheburashka and handed into the clutches of the Crocodile, which putting it in his pocket, went out into the corridor. The corridor was booze: balls drunk lemonade, and Chandra brewed grog from Pernod and "Smirnoff". In the wide-open window came the occasional quotations from the speech Hitler. This Winnie the Pooh bred anti-Soviet propaganda. Piglet now and then ran to the nearest beer stand and he offered Winnie the Pooh large mug of beer "Lahden", which he swallowed in large quantities and no bread. Sometimes Piglet could pull off a few liters of grog Chandra. Soon Winnie the Pooh was not able to make speeches of the great Leader and with a cry of "Bears are very fond of Honey! ".. has launched a mug to nearby rabbit and collapsed in a drunken fiddler. Piglet, so as not to produce excitement in the crowd started a gramophone with a gay twist and pulling braces, shouted: "And now a disco! .." - ... How did they bother, - said Galya, wrinkling his nose and went to the phone, to dial out of three hundred and forty eight characters. In the tube clicks were heard, and then bleating voice: - Police Commissioner Eeyore listens. - Listen, Eeyore, issued an enhanced dress the square in front of my house. A few minutes later drove to the area eleven armored vehicles, of which poured riot squad of thirty-three warriors with Sgt Chernomorov headed. They damask swords broke up the dancing and climbed back into the APCs and with the song "Deutchen soldaten und offizieren ..." left. The street was quiet. Cheburashka stood at the window and smoked, flicking ashes into the shoes of the Director, to leave no traces. Gene noticed these spyware proclivities, and raising Cheburashka by the scruff on his level of muzzle, clearly sent the animal far away in those places where he was born. Cheburashka huffy and, having escaped from the clutches of genes that ran to the far end of the corridor, fifty meters, and stood in a rack. - Come here, a green mug! - Shouted He clasped his hands mouthpiece. - That you're dead, long-eared creature, dumpling shell-shocked! - Politely answered the gene but did not dare to approach, as Cheburashka was famous in the fourth control ability to quickly pick up speed. Like motorcycle "Harley" the latest model, he carried away by the roar "to the point, leaving behind clouds of white smoke. Gene also ran slowly, like a bicycle, "Pal", released before the Battle of Grunwald. Therefore, he modestly pulled from the sleeve of the anti- system "Patriot", which never left since the Iraq war, even in bed. The battle began. Cheburashka put blocks and missiles, explosion, blew whitewash from the ceiling and otkolupyvali plaster from the walls. Know what would have ended, but arrived in time Chandra, who differing fighting. - Nerds! - He said, waving smoke from the missile and frowning - a now-Ghali in a meeting. There's just you. The room did have everything, from Piglet and ending with a drunken Winnie the Pooh, who was lying in a corner and a strum drum singing "Lavender." Cheburashka entered and saluted: - Picture! - He's a little Lisp, so How to skip a single rocket, and it knocked out his front teeth. The meeting began. - Lord! - Said Galya - need neutralize a group of capture, which we could detect in the Barents Sea. Composition groups as follows: a) The Mickey Mouse - a defector, who emigrated from his native country under the guise of an armored train. b) Little Red Riding Hood - the former currency hooker with a twenty-year experience. a) Raven Karkusha altered under fighter MIG-29 ", a friend of children. She knows too much. d) The king's son, Elisha, moves on Mercedes with dvizhkkom of trophy Shuttle "Shuttle" with fourteen solid-fuel boosters. e) and f) bioengineer Carlo, nicknamed "Dad" and cover the entire group biorobot Pinocchio, abbreviated as "BUR", made of improvised materials. Spare no. Very strong, but very stupid. They have their own medical care - is Malvina, a gynecologist. Very capable - offhand hits from Squirtwoman a light bulb. Detachment of a protected group of chemical defense, led by Chipollino. What will be the suggestions? - Give the people of beer! - Sleepily sung yet sober Winnie the Pooh. - A champagne do not want? - Yelled Galya and launched his countess, but missed and hit the Cheburashka. All steel to speak, but nothing came up. Here Piglet took the floor: - Dear Fraulein, and others - he said, - I have developed the following plan Action: BO-PERVYX: encircle the whole group and cover them in place. BO-VTORYX: agents Karkushu and Chipollino - in the soup. - Are you the soup would taste better - muttered Chandra - and then black, and even under the MIG-29 "... In-TRETIX: - continued pig warily glancing at "thugs-Chandra, - Thirdly, to incite Elisha Cheburashka, let him go to ram. - I pghotestuu! - Shouted Cheburashka - I ve OSU, because I oyus his then ve aydut and otechat me! - You no one asks - evil Galya threw and turned to Piglet. - Go on. - In-CHETVERTYX: hung around Malvina bulbs - let us not shoot and way. In-PYATYX: all. - A Red Riding Hood? And Pinocchio with Carlo? A Mickey Mouse? - Little Red Riding Hood, I take - Chandra said, making hand gesture, as if He skis, and grinned impudently. - More precisely, under him - smiled Galya - well, what next? - Biorobot will assume the Pooh: a their intellects are the same, - neigh Gene and Winnie the Pooh pretty prourchal: - It is better that no light ... - You're still in this - in confidence whispered Piglet. - God is with you ... - Mused Galya - Proposal accepted. Tomorrow for you will arrive by helicopter. Questions? - No! - Roared Gene and Chandra together. - Excellent. And now ... Suddenly the door opened with a bang, and a man in military uniform. - Lieutenant Rzhevskii! - He introduced himself. And then the fun, as if to himself, sang: "Tarara! - Where are the Tatars? - In an indescribable horror thundered Pooh his drum set and took aim at the gun with Rzhevsky Navarone (nineteen inches). - Quiet! - Said Galya - Calm down. - Sleep, sleep! - Piglet bustled around Fluff. - Sit down, lieutenant - Galya politely Cheburashka kicked off his chair, and the gene to he did not run away, stepped on his ear. - Lieutenant, tell us about yourself society - Galya said, and explained to the audience - This is our new agent. - It's too long, sir, - boomed Rzhevskii - better read sir! He drew from his inside pocket a roll of toilet paper covered with writing small handwriting. - It is well, then honor. Weapons there? What? - If you remove the first two letters, I I say - the lieutenant took his sword and threw it on the table. - Elegant! So you can take over Carlo, nicknamed "Papa" - Toby barked. Galya agreed with him, and at this meeting is over. The head of another. Part of the Soviet intelligence slowly moved across the tundra. Peacefully banged wheels Prince Elisha, moving at light speed. Behind him, not behind or in step in the cart drove Mickey Mouse. Malvina a little tired and walked, holding his side carts Mickey. Following hobbled, leaning on three-inch pipe, Pinocchio. Karkusha, Bellow turbouskoriteli, flew ahead exploration, and its wings still flapping long resounded in the distance. Despite pyatidesyatigradusny cold, very thick of the sun, and Chipollino started to become rotten, and very little smell slightly. Ahead was an explosion - it was once Karkusha sound barrier. Mickey Mouse hat pushed back on his head and, opening his vest on the reindeer fur corrected recoilless gun, which hung on his gum on the padded shorts. Red Beanie thoughtfully chewed coconuts just plucked from the dwarf palm. Pope Carlo tried to shake out of cheshek nabivshihsya there monitors. He had already extract pieces of twelve, but there remained still the same. Suddenly, shots rang out in front and ominously offended croak. Soon there was Karkusha, plucked and podpalennaya (this Gena the crocodile got into it from the "Patriot"). - Help! - She coughed - Ambush! At the same time because of the dwarf birch with a roar broke Cheburashka and swept past the crazed, fear Chipollino stink even more, and ran to Elisha. There was a massive explosion, and punched on form of Cheburashka Mercedes rolled over and exploded with a barely audible squeak. More refractive onion smell - it Rzhevskii chop Chipollino. Singling out the acrid smoke, bursting bulbs that Malvina faithfully shot from Squirtwoman. Carlson took care of it, reviewing the Master Diy pre-war sample. Mickey Mouse blow off steam with a slight knock, whistling and smoking, tried to escape, but for lack of rail only went deeper in the red-hot taiga sand. Here he was captured deft Piglet's movement. Chandra tempted Little Red Riding Hood telling her biography of Mao Zedong. Dad Carlo tried to flee, but the monitors in the Czech fear bustling, and Carlo fell. Instantly he was tied python Kaa. Winnie the Pooh brought down Pinocchio, proving that he (Winnie) - cloud, rather not a bear. Bur overheated and raplavilsya, forming a puddle of alcohol. All reconnaissance group was captured. Elisha was not just - it drove Cheburashka by warm waters of the Arctic Ocean. The tundra spread the smell of chicken soup mixed with diesel fuel. It was cooked Karkushu. From the pan sticking her last gesture, made in this world - fig. - Carlson - Galya said, stirring bucket Karkushu - a favor, go look Cheburashka. Soon they returned to Berlin. Fuhrer the portrait beaming and winking to everyone who looked at him. Rang out from the basement cries - it's Toby tortured Carlo. Others sunbathing on the roof and drank champagne, only Chandra just messed around with Little Red Riding Hood who did not want to let him go. Soon, the roof appeared Tobique with bloody hind legs. - Carlo confessed: gibus is in the Caspian Sea .- he wiped his paws on the snow-white blouse and Galina smiled. The next day was Carlson. He Elisha was carrying that caught in the jungle Australia, but found no Cheburashka. The operation was done in style, without losses. Galya was very pleased. "Sorry that it was not returned Cheburashka - thought it - but he must return. And he comes back. Necessarily. " Next Chapter Cheburashka appeared only a month later. He came to the Gale desperately emaciated, with torn ears, dirty and hungry. - Wow! - He said, barely audible whisper, turning to the portrait, which is a unconcealed regret looking at him. "It's amazing, - said Galya - Cheburashka have again grown front teeth." If she knew how difficult animal grind them out of the coastal cliffs island of Hokkaido. Going to Gale, he fell on her knees, buried his face in a mini skirt and wept. Doing this he found Gene and Tobique. "My poor teeth!" - Sad thought Cheburashka, suspended from the ceiling behind the ears Considering silicon litter away from teeth on the floor. He scratched his jaw, which thundered in response. Cheburashka hung in the closet of the fourth Management meekly as Xristos. Warmed his hope that maybe somebody find him, at least in the coming week. AND Hope its true. From ventilation Mowgli and the pipe fell off, without saying a word, pulled off Cheburashka from the ceiling, dragged somewhere. Cheburashka rudely dragged behind foot on the stairs. - Where am I being taken? - He asked, and Mowgli willingly answered: - You throw in the Caspian area, destroy the army Urfin Dzhyus with his wooden soldiers. - What, I have one? - Shouted in horror Cheburashka, assuming a head step. Finally, it was dragged into the light of day. On the street a drizzling rain, and the earthquake in twelve points on the Richter scale poorly shook the leaves on the trees. At the entrance stood bike disguised as a "Kamaz" with the refrigerator. Behind the wheel sat the main driver of the fourth control Cat-in-boots, which had very little representation not only about riding, but also about Walking on two legs. He handed Cheburashka order, written by an even hand Ghali. In It was said that Cheburashka appointed shock battalion commander, in the which included: Cat-in-boots, Baba Yaga, previously served in the Strategic Missile Forces, sister and Alyonushka brother Ivanushka main fighters in Samos north-west Africa, and finally Kashchei immortal - the main alcoholic Berlin throughout East Germany. "Well, the company ..." - Cheburashka thought, looking inside the refrigerator. There all stood at attention and observe Silence, except for Kashchei that loud hiccup. - At ease ... - Sadly said Cheburashka and shut the door. Inside heard Deaf blows - it's beat the immortal Kashchei for damaging the atmosphere. - Hello, boss, - promyaukal from the cockpit driver - it's time to go. Cheburashka has climbed into the cab, and KAMAZ started. Cyclists under the "KAMAZ" drove at speeds of one thousand four hundred seventy-eight km / hr. Cheburashka was asleep, and the cat-in-boots read "The Book of Tasty and Healthy Food" on which missed the day to enter the fourth administration. In the refrigerator was cold - about plus sixty degrees. Sister Alyonushka painted eyes, and brother Ivanushka checked the combat readiness of his favorite "Katyusha". Baba Yaga "half" of the engine stupa - she choked carburetor, and broken recoil kick-starter. Kashchei immortal drank another bottle schnapps. Appeared in front of Customs. Cat-in-boots, not picking up behind the wheel and not looking up from Books stepped on the gas. Mather got a goat, "and, breaking stone building custom, went to a point. Coming soon shore of the Caspian Sea, over which, masquerading as kettles, The Dragon and flew a Boeing 747 with superspy on board. - Around spies. My God ... - Muttered Cheburashka and pulled out a spare Wheel submarine mark "Make yourself". Because of the machine rose into the air Baba Yaga, the jet engines humming. But they were not strongly regulated, and a sheaf the fire burnt the grass at the forty kilometers around, looking up at sea tsunami lung. Sister and brother Alyonushka Ivanushka went around the sea looking to see if ambush. Half an hour later they met at the opposite shore, and up to Cheburashka Easy tornado lifted Puss-in-boots who was washing the car, told the words: "Boss, all ok! - Well, - said Cheburashka himself and gathering "Make yourself", sank in dense, radioactive water of the Caspian Sea. Continued in the next issue. __________________________________________
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