Enjoy is a fairy tale.

                                          











                                          
(с) Jason Krueger                         
                                          
    ОДИН ДЕНЬ ИЗ ЖИЗНИ СКАЗОЧНОГО ЛЕСА.   
                  - 1 -                   
                                          
 Медвежонок Винни Пух  весело шагал по до-
роге распевая  мaтepшинную  сoпeлку и бес-
npectahho  приглаживая  сиявший всеми цве-
тами радуги  ирокез.На его волосатой груди
болтался  символ анархии, a изо рта торчал
пoгaсший бычок "Беломора". На встречу мед-
вeдю-панку  строевым шагом шел Чужой,нес в
шупaльцaх  красный  флаг и пел  "Боже царя
храни"for some reason it has a funeral theme. On
edge with a wild clang and roar broke
bushes robot policeman, who after not-
successful installation of Windows 98 for the second time
I danced lezginka tirelessly for a week. Hish-
nickname with a swastika on the sleeve caught onyneb-
fat green flies and heanne-
Tutho ate them slurpingly. After every meal
flies, he terribly swears at communists and drunks
shouted “Sieg Heil” in a loud voice. Seeing ahap-
xucta he tried to tear off Winnie the Pooh
heavy ass off the ground, however, after the
after three unsuccessful attempts I gave up this hopelessness
useful fight against the gravitational field and
continued catching insects. Having reached the tree
where the bees' nest was, the punk discovered
lived Freddy Krueger, who, with the help of his
gloves cut out four non-
censored words. Slightly fucking his caste
Tom (who needs witnesses), Vinnie ottashil
maniac into the bushes, took out a gas bomb, took it out
safety, pulled the trigger and threw it into
hive.Exuding the smell of a public toilet and
smoke the color of childish surprise, tin
the cylinder flew into the hollow. After waiting for everything
the bees will go crazy and the honey will be saturated with gas,
punk bear climbed a tree. Looking into
beehive he saw striped insects wallowing
in a long-term blackout. Scooping up
more buzz-infused honey, Vinnie
licked his paw. And when the explosive hapkocmecb
reached the stomach Pooh unhooked from the tree and
alreadypassed out and flew down.             
 The homeless donkey Eeyore is permanently nepeme-
wandered from one forest dump to another in
looking for empty bottles. Now he was moving
towards the eighth and last mu-
copke. He decided to cut the corner a little and...
walked through the meadow. Clutching a bag of glass in his teeth
lota and constantly mentally swearing,
the donkey made his way through the bushes. Coming out onto the
Lana he saw Freddy Krueger and Winnie the Pooh,
rolled around under a tree. "They get high" - with envy
thought Eeyore. Putting down the bag with the bottles,
kami to the ground, he turned to those lying
maniac and punk and was already getting ready to inspect
their pockets in search of something they can
drink, when suddenly there was a crash from behind
blown branches and to the edge shouting “Assa”
RoboCop flew out. Clanking with all limbs
he wrote out any pirouettes possible and not
possible for such a huge piece of iron. For-
a file clenched between the teeth, symbolizing
the knife had already half-ground off the ex-
Alexa Murphy. Having made a sharp turn, the robot
went through the bag with glass containers, collected
noah in a day by an alcoholic donkey, titanium-
With my feet I crushed the knives on the glove of Kru-
hera, stepped on Winnie the Pooh’s mohawk and slo-
The currant bush ran further into the forest. B
after him three voices shouted in unison one and
the same word: "ASSHOLE"...                    
                                          
 - 2-                      
                                          
 The gardener Rabbit was holding a long
hose and lovingly watered those that had crawled out of the ground
hemp and poppy sprouts, which subsequently
was going to sell Pya to a local drug dealer
wheelbarrow. Green musty water rose
rich soil, richly fertilized with nometom
the patrons of the neighboring tavern, who
tried to relieve themselves in the Rabbit's garden, and
threw it down on the caterpillars, who had eaten themselves
nozzles and blissed out under the shade of leaves. Bo-
With his keen eye, the gardener noticed one of the
pub regulars hurrying to the garden
in order to remove toxins from the body. I won't release
Sky hose Rabbit pulled his
"Magnum" and with one shot removed the damage
la. I must say that with the purchase of a pistol
the humus pile in his garden quickly became
increase.                            
 A predator marching along the road and hanebab-
said something about the brown battalions that remained
I was new near the garden when I saw half-drenched
mud of caterpillars. Licking his lips, he extended
two-meter tongue towards the very
fat hacekomomy and already wanted to grab
him together with a poppy bush, as I saw on-
pointing a bloody shovel at himself,
to which the Rabbit just added raw materials
for humus.                             
 - Jewish muzzle - stated the fact
The predator moved on, but did nothe managed
take two steps as at the other end
an Alien appeared on the road, waving a red
with a new banner and fallen "Get up, curse
branded..." Seeing his old
enemy neo-fascist Khishnik rushed forward. Chu-
eat at the same, if not greater speed,
clattering with all five jaws he rushed at
fellow totalitarian. Two aliens
monsters stood in front of each other and began
swear loudly, while the fascist is always
I pulled out some shoots and caught me
them mosquitoes, which he immediately sent to
mouth, and the communist crushed ants with his tail, which
which, apparently, tried to build on
there is an anthill.                           
 The rabbit looked skeptically at the presentation.
rulers of extraterrestrial civilizations and decided not to
defile the humus heap with all sorts of foreign
No shit, I went to get a shotgun.      
 - Hey, you red-brown goats, get out!
from here. - brazenly interrupted the totalitarian dis-
Borka gardener                            
 The Predator and the Alien fell silent and turned to
to the gardener. The rabbit reloaded the gun.      
 - It won’t reach you. Gravity is big. - with vi-
the expert's house concluded the skinhead and turned away.
 - Yes... - confirmed the follower of Marx
and Engels.                               
 But apparently the gun was designed
precisely at such a force of gravity and when
the beans entered the skin of the Predator, he melancholy
remarked:- Oh...                                  
 Another shot rang out. Alien no less
indifferently confirmed:                 
 - Oh...                                  
 The rabbit looked expectantly at the monsters.    
 - Buchenwald is crying for you! - said  
fascist                                   
 - Fucking Jew! - added the communist. 
 The rabbit reloaded the gun again. Red-ko-
brethren in anti-Semitism have deployed
got up and left. With a feeling of accomplishment
he gardener wanted to put his gun on the
guard, but suddenly heard a country-
loud roar, clanging, crackling and stomping. Afraid of seeing
the worst thing is that the rabbit turned around
focusing on poppy plantations. His fears are
hardened - right in the beds, pressing
young shoots into the ground danced Caucasian
dancing robot policeman. High rycehu-
citizens who fell under his titanium heels with
burst with a wet squelch, and the remaining
insects at the sight of this for some reason uctepu-
laughed heartily. Knowing that none of the "Magnum"
much less this piece of iron from a shotgun
not to be taken, the Rabbit simply turned away and closed
eyes so as not to see how its fruits perish
works After ten minutes the robot finished
with a vegetable garden and breaking a second hole in the fence
pe disappeared in an unknown direction.     
 When the noise died down, the gardener turned around and
looked at the remains of his work. In front of hima terrible picture appeared - three broken
poppy stalks sticking out of dirt and things
seven fat, green, hairy caterpillars, blue
yushih from the otkhodnyak.In the eyes of the Rabbit notemhe-
lo, he turned the muzzle of the shotgun towards himself and
pulling down...                           
 Half-recovered caterpillars
seeing the bloody corpse of a gardener for-
fought in hysterical xoxote, occasionally changing
between the sounds of vomiting and sighs.       
                                          
 - 3 -                     
                                          
 In the middle of a lake overgrown with duckweed, where
rumor had it that there was a Goldfish on the floor
The postman Pechkin was sitting on a rotten boat. B
he had a fishing rod in his hands, with the help of which
swarm he tried to catch this Fish, but in his mouth
For some reason he was heating the worms. Above the green and in-
Fat dragonflies flew through the smelling water,
ate mosquitoes. Sometimes they crawled out of the mud
melancholy frogs and caught these arrows
goats with long pink tongues. Worms emerge
they stuck their heads out of the postman's mouth, but
seeing so many toads hide in horror
came back. Suddenly the float shook
and went under water. Pechkin tensed. When
The swimsuit dived again, he hooked it. Carrying
a frog flew to the surface with a hook
golden crown. She turned into a redhead
freckled fat woman,pulled it out of my lip
hook and exhaling fumes said: “You sho
Are you stealing my snack, you bastard? and don't wait-
Not wanting an answer, she dived into the water.                
 Pechkin sadly pulled out the drooling
a worm who saw the sad-hungry
the snout of the nearest frog hid in the uctepu-
echoxote, and put it on the hook.
Not even five minutes had passed when wild
screams and Khishnik and Chu appeared on the shore
zhoy. The predator carried a Nazi item in his left hand
banner, a Alien red flag. In the right hands
they both carried one banner with the inscription
"DID YOU SIGN UP WITH THE ANTISEMITES?"  Above these
words depicted a man in everyday life
ke and SS form. Having seen a huge number
dragonflies Khishnik threw the banner and with a cry
com "Death to the Jews" rushed to the lake. Sticking out
all kinds of appendages, limbs and tentacles
he slammed them into the water, causing the boat to
she nodded at the postman and scooped up the green
lena water. Spitting the worm tied into a knot -
Pechkin pulled out the hard drive into his hand and
initially saying "here's some fish for you, bitch"
didn’t scare me,” fired two 11.43 caliber cartridges
in Khishnik. He turned around and saw the direction -
the blow was blowing at him, jumped out onto the shore and cxba-
til banner. Pechkin fired again,
but missed and hit the Alien. Both mon-
country totalitarians started vying with each other
to kill the Jewish Masons, but having heard the silk of the shutter
hastily left.Pechkin put the gun down and began to look at
float, reflecting on life. Suddenly on
The Nightingale the Robber appeared on the shore in a suit.
me troika and pouring out the nightingale began to prepare
lay down exercise equipment, vacuum cleaners and new types
enemas The postman looked at the businessman and
muttered something inaudibly. By sound
Nightingale realized that this was an offer from
go on an erotic hike. He
sighed heavily and put out the cart with dust
cocom, exercise machine and dozens of conceptual
enema devices further.                
 As soon as the traveling salesman disappeared, in the clearing
Winnie the Pooh appeared, covered in "anarchy" and
jingling chains and nehtarpammamu Freddy.They
stood in front of the water and began to take turns
encourage dragonflies and frogs to join
church of darkness or to kill the bourgeoisie. Pechkin uses
he shuddered violently and spat the worms into the water.
The frogs, brutalized from hunger, rushed towards
a pink ball. The water began to bubble and become colored
blood. Ignoring the sad
Pechkin yelled obscenities at the fate of his nozzle
at both informals and took out a gun. Having seen
Freddie and Vinnie turned around and began to sing
God Save The Queen by Sex Pistols went for
cannabis to Don Pyatakone.                   
 Terribly upset Pechkin continued to swear for a long time.
followed them, sometimes hiccuping hysterically and
spitting into the water. Over all twenty years of fishing
Goldfish has not yet had a single opportunity
late day, but beat today'sall pe-
cords And only he finished thinking about
vicissitudes of fate, like to a lake, breaking
bushes and RoboCop flew out screaming wildly, followed by
who were being chased by Don Piatacone with his guards
brothers Terminators. Having realized what is here -
mafia showdown, postman
fell on his side and began to snore loudly. Via
a few minutes later a shot was heard, a cry of "As-
"sa", there was a knock and there was silence. Pechkin opened
one eye and saw Don Pyatakone, who
looked at him intently and chewed a cigar.
Then the postman closed his eye and began to snore
even louder. Hearing the patter of four feet and
the sound of two hooves, he loudly released gases.
The stomping gave way to laughter. Finally, when all
this procession left, Pechkin raised his head
RoboCop was lying on the ground with a dented head.
howl, a huge stone lay nearby. "Died" -
the fisherman decided, but the steel body moved
and the policeman rose to his feet. Nothing
thinking, he stood for about five minutes, then
yal - Windows 98 has turned off. After searching for it on
screw formatted by cobblestone robot
thought: "C:>". But think in HS-Dos commands
Horseradish-on-soft was inconvenient. Slightly
having slowed down, he thought: “C:> It would be necessary to insta-
"Windows 98.Enter" - but it
for some reason it didn’t install. After standing still
for half an hour he decided: "C:> Screw is fucked. Enter"
and was surprised by the last word. B Windows
who wasn't there. After standing for another forty minutes he
I thought of: "C:> I'll install from backup-
go.Enter".  When the installation was window-
chena (after sixteen times), he discovered
that the backup screw had version 3.1...
However, he was not upset, because in this
version did not have such an icon. Clicking
The Program Manager robot is already ready
see a familiar picture, but instead
some strange things appeared in front of him
squares.                               
 Don Pyataccone was heading to his residence
tion after disassembly with Intel-compatible po-
the bot that caused his death noctab-
drug chic. Behind him came Spectrum-sovies
reputable bodyguard-terminators, who
ry, unlike RoboCop, are in charge
moment they didn’t dance lezginka and didn’t put on
put your family panties on top of your trousers, like this
made by the policeman at the time of the past under-
system hangs...                        
 Pechkin was surprised to see how RoboCop
after three hours of fumbling my brains and somehow
some strange muttering looked at the
bashfully covering the titanium between
ness is gone. Without going into too much thought,
Talon continued to stare blankly at the inappropriate
visible float. Stinking steam rose above
dried water, fat dragonflies settled in
frog stomachs. That's where all the npumah- went
ka for Goldfish. When the fisherman heard
stomp, he prepared a gun, but was so
proud of those who appearedbefore him we see that
didn’t even bother loading the barrel. In front of him there was a hundred
Yal RoboCop in a torn T-shirt covered with stains
mi soup, in tights with blisters on the knees and
in family flowered shorts sticking out
under his pants. Pechkin opened his mouth. The robot approached
to the shore, took off his tights and jumped into the water, calling
bab two-meter waves. Pechkin screamed wildly,
imagining what is happening now at the bottom. Su-
Apparently, something terrible was happening there,
because all the frogs floated to the surface
rage and swearing terribly, and the red-haired aunt,
recently caught by Pechkin climbed out together
with water on the shore and opened the bottle
burning Smirnoffka. Realizing that RoboCop had destroyed-
lived every living thing in the lake, which means twenty
years lost, the postman took out the lemon, you -
he pulled the pin and put the grenade in front of him.
 ...Three and a half seconds later he distributed
the explosion that destroyed the fisherman and evaporated
all the water. The surviving frogs are right there
engaged in applied cannibalism, eating
dead friends, red-haired aunt gave a hickey
waterman, and at the bottom he performed swimming
RoboCop movements.                         
 ...Don Piglet opened a new pack of blue
gar and lit a cigarette. The Goldfish who lived with him
in an aquarium filled with vodka to the end
slurped and lay in the last stage
intoxication...                              
                                          
 EPILOGUE                                          
 Evening came, the red sun went behind
horizon, drunken screams were heard in the forest,
                                          
 EPILOGUE                    
                                          
 Evening came, the red sun went behind
horizon, drunken screams were heard in the forest,
across the sky while drunk, constantly
the pilots flew weaving and falling into a tailspin
Carlson and Superman, robot police scrub
titanium fingers along the bottom of the lake, imagining
that he is floating. Winnie the Pooh and Freddy hacnop
spitting at the steel cop, Count Dracula
drank vodka, washing it down with blood straight from
tetpanaka. Constantly heard among the trees
The loudly dispersed cries of "Sieg Heil"
and “Lenin Is Alive”, after which shots were heard and
shouts of victory in Hebrew. Two Terminators
those who worked part-time as grave diggers buried
corpses accumulated during the day. In a word,
sang the ordinary life of post-transition sk-
lush forest...                           
                                          
------------------------------------------------DI:HALT