Instructions for using toilet paper. .JOKE
WARL0CK 02/15/97
Purpose, condition and technical data of the product:
toilet paper (art. 11315509b51).
The product is designed to remove residues from the defecation process.
from the outer edge of the anus adjacent to it
areas of the skin and locally concentrated in this area
body hair (hereinafter referred to as the place of use).
1. Read these instructions carefully. Instructions
should be secured with MB screws in an easily accessible and good location
bright place in the user's line of sight
(users).
2. Place the roll of the product at the user’s chest level
slightly horizontal position.
3. Perform an act of defecation. 4. Make sure the act is successfully completed and there are no urges
to its continuation (this point is very important for saving and
rational use of the product).
5. With a direct forward movement of the right hand downwards, grab
tip (of the product), and then with a sharp movement up and to the right
pull at approximately an angle of 60 degrees to the horizon line
(product), thus unwinding 700 mm of paper tape (for
for user convenience, every 100 mm of the product is marked
perforation).
b. Multidirectional movements of the hands in the horizontal plane
tear the tape approximately halfway between the two
the nearest perforation areas.
NOTE: It is not recommended to tear in sections
perforation due to the risk of disruption and deformation of the fibrous
structure of the product material.
7. Fold a piece of the product in the form of an accordion (accordion),
sequentially bendingaccording to perforation areas.
8. Place in the hand most comfortable for the user.
9. Apply the product obtained during the previous manipulations to
place of use and, pressing tightly with your hand to the skin,
make wiping movements in the intergluteal space.
10. Using a clean, dry hand, check the quality of cleaning (intergluteal
the space should feel dry and slightly rough to the touch). B
If a poor-quality wipe is detected, carry out manipulations,
described in paragraphs 4-9 three or four more times.
PRECAUTIONARY MEASURES:
1. Do not smoke near the product.
2. Do not throw used products in cultural areas,
rest and eating.
3. Keep away from children. Toilet paper is not a toy, but
hygiene product.
4. Repeated use of the product is not recommended.+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
1. Do not smoke near the product.
2. Do not throw used products in cultural areas,
rest and eating.
3. Keep away from children. Toilet paper is not a toy, but
hygiene product.
4. Repeated use of the product is not recommended.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
If, after reading this article, you think that I sat and composed
these instructions, then you are wrong. This instruction is actually
attached to a product called toilet paper. True I am
I didn’t see it being distributed in stores in our city, but
According to unverified data, this is true in the city of Yekaterinburg. Personally, I this
I typed the instructions from the newspaper "Komsomolskaya Pravda" from the section
"Consumer Club".****************************************************************
0t editor-in-chief: no words...
****************************************************************
Share your thoughts about the article