How the ZX F0RMAT discussed... DISCUSSION?!
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Well... In this issue of our newspaper, I hasten to please you
(our dear readers) a more lively discussion... In my opinion, this is me
I've heard it somewhere before... CRAZY ALEX
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│ How ZX F0RMAT discussed. │█
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(C) 1997 AK-47. N.TAGIL.
Three against one
We are not afraid of anyone!..
(Cool guys.)How good it is to sit down with AMIG
And shit the person,
It's fun and simple...
The three of us will wrap the letter together...
And then, loading the toy
Fuck up the keyboard...
(Summary.)
...Russer (P) is finally tired of reading the number of letters
which ungrateful readers sent to the editor
ZX-FORMAT... The poor fellow plucked up courage and sat down with this
problem on DICTAT0R (DI)...
...The brilliant solution to this problem hit the bright light like urine
the head of MAD MAX (here MM, popularly simply “TAMPAX”).
All that remained was to find the critical letter from the capital and how
possibly more remote city N. Poor ALEX was unlucky
it was he who became the victim of a reduction in the number of letters addressed to
editors of the great, order of the rusty microprocessor, three times hero
Chukotka Republic magazine ZX-FORMAT!..
...And so they sat downwriting a colorful "discussion" in which
the guys had a cool discussion with ALEX's letter... They wrote like
relies on AMIG to then scan the text onto its
native SC0RPI0N...
MM: Here's what I'm thinking, guys: "should we include in the article
a couple of drawings?
P: What a good idea...
...MM himself had to act as the “connector”... Nothing
can't help it... After a short connection to the network
the poor man's hair stood on end, he remembered episodes of difficult
childhood, when MAXI connected his favorite plug to the network, pioneer
youth, when my grandmother, remade into
android "by the skillful hands of a young technician", and then
Komsomol youth, when the MAX is already moderately “twitched”
connected my "SPECTRUM-48" through a "welder" (we saw fireworks on
May 9?) Having finally taken pictures, the guys took a good look at them
scanned and embedded into the article...
DI: Shouldn’t we drawwhat else can we do with ALEX,
will it fall into our hands?!.
P: What a good idea...
P and DI looked at MM with hope...
MM: Nooooooooooooo!.. No way!!!
* * *
DI: We need a cool epigraph!
MM: “Epi...” - what?..
DI: Who the hell knows, I just found this in the dictionary
in short... something like... um... at the beginning it is written somewhere...
P: I offer a phrase from my medical practice...
DI: That will do, epi...we already have this one... How about an article
shall we call it?MM: Who cares? We?
P: We!
MM: The bulk of the text belongs to us?
P: Us!
MM: So let’s name the article in honor of us - “LAMER’S CORNER”!
DI: Well, that sounds!
MM: I hate this ALEX!
DI: For what?
MM: Because he’s a hacker, but that’s not his biggest sin!
After all, this guy DOESN'T EVEN HAVE ANY LEGAL VERSION
ZX-FORMAT!!!P: He should burn in hellfire for this!..
DI: Don’t forget to sign so that you can give yourself a soldering iron, you know
where to feel the difference...
P: By the way, Dick, have you pulled yours out of there yet?..
DI: No, I still don’t feel the difference...
P: Well, for some reason I too... But I’ve been going for three years now...
MM: Yes, Rzhavyi, you forgot to turn it on...
P: What do you think this is?!
MM: And this is a fishing... By the way, Dick, don’t forget to write that
hackers have no right to buy programs, just like in a bakery
taxi ride! So they suffer for this, walking to the bakeries
they're coming!!!
DI: The classics should be quoted...P: Maybe: x.. ...!!!
DI: Where is this from?
P: Pushkin A. S. ...
MM: I didn’t know he was such a vulgar...
P: You would have been crushed by a candlestick!!!
DI: I suggest Gorky...
MM: 0, we are always ready for a drink!..
DI: No, A.M. Gorky...
P: Well, why the hell do we need him?
MM: Listen, Dick, this same Gorky is a hacker, by chance
wasn't it?!.P: Listen, guys! What if ALEX gets offended by us? Maybe
Shall we compliment him?
DI: Well, okay, so be it - let’s call it a “handbrake”!
MM: Isn’t it too bold?.. To achieve this, we slow down
We drink liquid, but he immediately “handbrake”?
* * *
MM: Hey Dick, is “only” spelled with or without a soft sign? Yes no
not after the “k”... Look in the dictionary... But don’t look at the “l”... No,
“t” does not come after “m”... Hmm, really, without half a liter it’s not possible
take it apart!.. Gurgle-glug-glug! Huh, and how its only party
they drink... However, with half a liter, something is also unclear... Perhaps
I still have to take a sip...
(For the next two weeks, they had no time for the dictionary...)
MM (after these two weeks): Well, it seems I’ve almost finished it
WALKER herebut where does it go? Wow! The first clever idea of this
hacker, BECAUSE MY WALKER CAN BE PUSHED INTO THE GLUCODROM! Here
just how? I’ll ask ALEX, since he suggested it, let him
and develops the idea!!!
DI: Guys who have the book "How to Pretend You're Smart."
I desperately need it!
P: Dick, give me a hint in this article, maybe someone will send you
a copy, or even some practical advice, will help...
DI: Well, Max, write: “for those who don’t understand, let’s explain - this was written
stupid, fixated lamers, obsessed with AMIG and absolutely
deprived of a sense of humor, without which it is so difficult to live in our
time..."
...But MM, unlike DI, didn’t suffer from a hangover at all
self-criticism and therefore he “slightly” changed the meaning of the latter
sayings of my friend...
DI: Well, in conclusion, you need to send him a mouse board as
moral compensation... Any objections?.. No?.. Great!
Let's chip in...P: Maybe he doesn’t need a Kempston-mouse board?
DI: What does he need?
P: Well, something cheaper... Otherwise he’ll break his lip,
AMIG will require it to “feel the difference”?..
──────────────────────────────── ────────────────────────────────
ZX-FORMAT is a great magazine, orders of a rusty microprocessor,
three times hero of the Chukotka Republic. Writes only about AMIGA's;
SC0RPI0N'ah; IS-DOS and GENERAL SOUND. Negotiates
linoleum.
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P.S. To the insolent magazine, not yet publicly “carved out”
whips", a bunch of computers are sent as compensation
bells and whistles (list attached), connecting which (just
how??? ) to your AMIG,you will receive a supercomputer that
will easily surpass (spit further) MAS.
┌────────────────────────────── ──────────────────────────────┐
│ │▄
│ │█
│ LIST. │█
│ │█
│ 1). Donut hole (10 pcs.) │█
│ 2). Crystal clear Tagil air (a little) │█
│ 3). Hair of the Invisible Man (guess where?) │█
│ 4). Magic spell from evil spirits (without human │█
│ sacrifices do not work) │█
│ │█
│ RECOMMENDATIONS: │█
│ │█
│ 1). If you think that “various smart gadgets” are only │█
│ rape the computer, it is recommended to use │█
│ use protective equipment (guess it - rubber, but not │█
│ gas mask? ) │█
│ 2). If your computer has become completely insolent, it doesn’t want to read│█
│ CD from a 5'25'' drive - try itsledgehammer... │█
│ 3). But still take out the soldering irons, maybe it will make you feel better?.. │█
│ │█
│ │█
│ WARNING: │█
│ │█
│ FOR THE TIME LOST IN 0 TRANSPORTATION OF THE GOODS, 0TBETCTBEH- │█
│ THE MAIL BEARS THE FUCK, NOT US!!! │█
│ │█
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ATTENTION!!!
DON'T FORGET TO CARRY OUT THE FOLLOWING EXPERIMENT WITH YOUR AMIG:
1). Fill a large bathtub with water (experimental accuracy
increases with the volume of the bath!)
2). Using a measuring device (a teaspoon), measure the volume of your
baths (V) in chelas (teaspoons).
3). Measure the weight of your AMIG.
4). Taking careful aim, throw yourAMIG'u with a decent
height in the bath (the accuracy of the experiment increases with increasing
heights, for the purity of the experiment, pre-treat
AMIG with a sledgehammer).
5). Observe the processes taking place in the bathroom and
draw conclusions:
a). If your AMIGA does not sink, then I think this model is
Tariyah does not need... You can stop the experiments, with
AMIG and so everything is clear.
b). AMIGA still sank. (which in itself is strange) In that
In any case, continue the series of experiments.
b). Connect the plug of your AMIG to the mains (preferably wet
hands, and even grounding yourself to the battery).
7). If you are still alive, without disconnecting the voltage and grounding
climb into the same bath.
HAVE A PLEASANT IMPRESSION!!!
Oh, are you still alive? Both AMIGA and bathtub gives excellent image and
high quality sound? Well then to AMIGA really- the
BEST!!!
IT IS NOT RECOMMENDED TO CONDUCT SUCH EXPERIMENTS WITH ENIAC!!!════════════════════════════════ ════════════════════════════════
Author: AK-47.
N. Tagil 1997
P.P.S. Will you post a discussion with my letter in the section
"another lamer's corner" - be sure to send it to AMIG (I
I don't waste time on small things.)!!!
P.P.S. Don't forget to write that I'm a stupid scribbler obsessed with
critical and completely devoid of a sense of humor, without which,
Naturally, life is hard these days... By the way, I also mean
same “handbrake” and User with a capital “U”, to the bakery (around the corner)
I fly in a helicopter, and I don’t have a single legal version
ZX-FORMAT (I'm going to hang myself).
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How's the discussion going?! There will be no comments from my side, so
as the text is completely written by AK-47 and understand it as you want...
And I’ll say AK-47: “If they send you AMIG, then half
belongs to me..." CRAZY ALEX
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