So, it's time to clear out our mail.
.....Unfortunately we do not have any mail
(since this is the first release), so
I'm trying to get out of it somehow.
In the programming world, many people
for some reason they began to call themselves “DR.”
which in translation apparently means doctors
(a striking example is RST7 in INSULT calls
ourselves DR.CRUNCHER).We just contacted
to one of these doctors with a request
share the correspondence, which is what he did.
So: questions and answers to questions for
DR.THIS.
1. "Dear doctor! I am 14 years old, I
schoolboy. Please help me. That's it
friends say that the computer should
have at least 128, but for me it’s only
only 48. I speak to my parents in
I’m embarrassed about this topic, they are strict with me.
Is this a pathology? Tell me,
what a normal modem should be like."
There is no pathology here. In this
In this case, the norm is everything that is sufficient
gives you pleasure to communicate that you
nice.
Remember, a lot depends on you.
I know many cases when a person with
computer on 48 did something that made him
to a neighbor (who, by the way, was on 512)
I didn't even dream about it.
It's a completely different matter if an adult
person he is no more than 16 - necessary
consult a doctor immediately.
2. “My name is Nastya, in the fall I will go at 8
class. My problemis that
that I have very little RAM.
Are there any ways to increase it?
ideas? The girls in class make fun of me -
Xia..."
There's nothing funny about this. Very many
Many people face this problem.
Fortunately, there is now
there are many ways to overcome it. Everyone has
has its advantages and disadvantages.
Which one to choose is up to you. Just not for-
please consult with a specialist first
leaf.
Z. “Misha, a conscript soldier, writes to you -
would. Three years ago I started training
demo-making, and I still do this
since then. I tried to quit several times, but
nothing came of it. I guess I'm a pervert
and weak-willed. Coming back soon
citizen - how can I look my comrades in the eyes
Shall I take a look?"
Calm down, there's no reason to worry
there is no room. This is completely normal
phenomenon, stage through which they pass
many. According to some data, up to 85% of men-
rank were doing the same thing or under-
They are still struggling with this. Usually through
it goes away for a while.
Of course, if you're into this
several times during the day, driving myself
before the frenzy - intervention is necessary
psychiatrist.
4. “My husband and I do re-
a backup copy of all our information.
I prefer Sigma floppy disks, but my husband likes
hang "GMD-1Z0 doubledensity".Which of
Are we right?"
You're both right. Each of you has
your ideal, your habits. Both
point of view has the right to exist
tion.
My advice is to do this more often.
5. "On our wedding night, my wife and I
tried installing the drive on Z.5,
but we didn't succeed. Maybe we
Are you sick with anything? Tell us where to go
apply?"
The main thing is not to worry. It didn’t work out
the first time - try again. Don't fight -
try to experiment, and you will have everything
Surely it will work out. Light the candles, turn on
those quiet calm music, and - forward!
Remember: more than 1,000,000 people have tested
got into the same troubles as you.
How many more will have to do this?!!
6. "How many pages of RAM do I have on my computer?"
tere?"
What difference does it make to you? If one - what,
won't you use it?
And if there are seven of them, will you add seven more? B
the main thing is that they exist.
7. “I just bought a new computer.
How can I determine if I'm the first to use it?
mate or not?
It doesn't matter. The most important thing is
find mutual understanding.
8. "How to insert a floppy disk correctly
5.25?"
Usually it is taken with the right hand and inserted
pour into a hole of suitable size
to a depth of about eight fingers.
However, if you are left-handed, you can safely use
use your left hand - there are no prohibitions here -are appropriate. Try to do this with the help of
lips, thighs, anal muscles -
this will add variety to your daily routine
new life.
9. "My new computer only has
to one drive for 5.25. At work
I have a lot of floppy disks left for Z.5".
Tell me if my drive can run 5.25
eventually adapt to floppy disks
Z.5"?
Alas, he won’t be able to. This is one of the brightest examples
ers of incompatibility.
10. "When I was in first grade,
a high school student approached and offered pi-
Write a program with it in BASIC. I became
refuse, but he forced me. From those
For now I write programs only in BASIC.
Sometimes when our parents leave, we
We get together in a group of 6-8 guys and write about
grams in BASIC together.
A year ago I met a girl and
she suggested that I write a program in
Assembler. Nothing worked out for me: me
I vomited and then had a headache for a long time.
My name is Valery Pavlovich, in September
I will turn 47 years old. My life is broken"
I am addressing first of all the adults
lym: Explain to your children what dangers
STIs lie in wait for them at school, on the street, in
guests. Tell us what they can do with them
adult uncles with mental disorders
. Just don't be too intimidating, kids.
are very impressionable, they can develop
there are complexes that will later me-
walk into themadult life.
11. “A student is writing to you. Recently I
the disk appeared. I really liked him
and soon I put it in the drive.
At first everything went well, but when I started...
tila the program, the disk behaved strangely
and offered a choice of 'Retry? Abortion?
Ignore? 'I chose Abortion... Correct
did I get in?
You did exactly the right thing. Just
You are out of luck with the disk. There are such dis-
chum salmon who are not interested in you and yours
program, but only the rotation process itself
in the drive. Don't worry - it's early
or later you will have another, good one
disk.
12. "I heard that there are shops in the west,
where are inflatable keyboards and de-
wooden disk drives."
We also have such stores, and
everywhere. But better buy yourself a good one
computer.
1Z. "Is it true that alcohol is harmful to pro-
programming?"
Absolutely. Firstly, the comfort level decreases
liberty, especially among women.Secondly,
nowadays up to 75% (!) of pro-
gram products are freaks. Even according to them
external signs are easy to guess
that most of them were written in
drunk. So get busy
programming more often, but certainly on
sober head.
------------------------------------------
Thanks to DR.THIS for the provided ma-
materials. And we will continue. One of these days to usa letter arrived with the question: “Is there any special
cial problem books in mathematics for
schools with in-depth study of computer science
?". We are pleased to announce that such a task -
there is a nickname! And now we will give a few
tasks from it.
Text of some program "GENS"
assembles in 1 minute, and the new assembler
Blair "ALASM" assembles the same text
in 7 seconds. How long will it take as-
assembly of the program if "GENS" and
"ALASM" to run simultaneously?
Vasya worked with the modem only on Thursdays
ny days of the month, and Kolya - 15 days in a row.
Who will get their phone bill first?
On the ZX-SPECTRUM computer the game 'Lode'
Runner' takes up 48 kB, and on a computer
IBM-PC is the same 'Lode Runner', only
only with SOUND effects, occupies 300
times more. How much will it take to
ZX-SPECTRUM WINDOWS-95, WINWORD and COREL
DRAW without SOUND effects?
The first hacker breaks two programs in
a week, and the second one breaks three programs in
a week. How long will it take them to
break "UFO-2", considering that in the middle
weeks they need to go to "ENLIGHT-96"?
----------------------------------------
That's not all, of course, but you can do the rest.
You can look in the book itself. By the way,
I came up with a competition. The one who comes first
years correct answers to problems (see above)
that onewill receive a free damaged disk
the one with filthy programs and plus a broken
new computer to boot!
And the last thing we want to show you is
there will be one very original description.
However, see for yourself!
Turn on the computer, launch TR-DOS,
make sure the drive is not responding,
Remove the drive, turn off the computer, search
protect the screwdriver, scold the screwdriver, knock over -
walking to no one knows where, you trip over the foot-
the cat chewing the wire, give the cat a
butt pad, make peace with the cat, run away
behind the soldering iron, put back the fallen
you have a box of hammers and others
tools, catch up with the cat and take away
he has a soldering iron, turn the soldering iron on
socket, fix the cable, look at
onto the soldering iron, make sure it burns through the
ver, turn off the soldering iron, curse the soldering iron,
open the window, calm down the fire brigade
and cat, turn on the computer, log into TR-
DOS, make sure the drive is not responding,
exit TR-DOS, turn off the computer,
take the screwdriver from the cat, make peace with
cat, remove the case from the computer, remove
drive, hit it against the floor, walls and
computer, insert the disk drive into the computer,
close the computer case, bandage
pinched finger, scold the body,
drink at the cat, scold the cat,make peace with
cat, turn on the computer, log into TR-
DOS, take the cat to another room,
make sure the drive is working,
Type "RUN", you will see "NO DISK" in response,
curse the drive, dial again, make sure
Be surprised that the computer writes the same thing,
press "ENTER" at intervals of 1 minute,
After an hour, determine that the floppy disks are valid.
Absolutely not, curse the floppy disk, the key
"ENTER", cat, disk drive, and computer,
insert the floppy disk, run "boot", make sure -
Be sure that this is not the right floppy disk, scold the dis-
chum salmon and cat, break the floppy disk, make peace
with a cat, go through the entire archive in search
floppy disks with "STAR LEGACY", run
"boot", ignore messages like
"Disk Eggog. Trk 0 Sec 9. Retry? Abort?
Ignore?", scold the floppy disk, computer and di-
skovod, load the game, press "START",
play for two to three hours, make sure you already
morning and go to bed, try to pull out
from the cat's bed, bandage the wounded
hand, put on gloves, get the cat out
from the bed, by the sounds from the next room
make sure the cat eats the disk wire
yes, get up, pull the cat by the tail,
send him for a walk and go back to bed
sleep, remove the thorns from your legs, scold
cactus, make peace with the cat, cactus, dis-
chum, disk drive, computer and key
"ENTER", sleep.
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