Seven and 1 / 2 - "Scary" - antalogiya black humor.

               "Scary"

         ANTALOGIYA black humor.
__________________________________________



      Boy quiet boy walked out of a movie,

     The house is opposite the window opened.

    A shot rang out in the stillness of the night
      Long steaming hole in the head.


      Boy found hleborez Mishan,

     Quietly climbed into the apartment director.

      Happened quickly black business
    In the bathroom, found the dismembered body.


   The Boy in the sealed envelope TNT,

    Pope put on the desk ...

     Son of the granite requested to write:

     "There was nothing to blame for the deuce!"


      Boy Volodya sat on the roof.

      If he was a butterfly, it flew.

    Quietly crept up to the club somebody:

       That dream came true idiot.


      Cold in dome.Papa a jacket.

      Mom daughter drowns in a small stove.


       Grandma was very fond of her granddaughter,

     Mina in her bed she laid.

    At night, two powerful explosions were heard
      Granddaughter grandmother also loved.


      Dad-old man with a butcher guts.

       Son angrily told him:

      "Santa has long had konchatPadal will only Ruble Twenty 
five." 


       Daddy wanted his son to poison

     Requests to put arsenic in the hot.

    The waiter suddenly becomes stricter:

      "There will be 20 cents more!"


    Brave Andrew played a diver

      Bravely, he dived to the bottom of the toilet.

        Good aunt pushed the pedal
     The boy sped away in a stinking distance.


        Not long muchilasya old

        In the high-voltage wires.

           Her charred carcass

        Timurovtsi found in the bushes.


      Girl in the grenade found.

      "What's that, Daddy?" She asked.

     "Dern ring", "her uncle said.

      Long bow flew over the field.


    Little Victor with ruzhishkom played.

     He was curious to understand.

     Finger awkwardly pulled the trigger
     Gushed in unison brains on the ceiling.


      Two lovers lay in the Rye.

       Quiet harvester was on balk.

        Quietly wound up and quietly went
   Someone in a loaf polpaltsa found ...


      The boy was walking in the winter on an ice floe.

  Suddenly slipped and fell into a hole.

   Long little hands clutching their ice floe ...

     No, I have seen funnier now!


        Highball Tbilisi-Baku railway.

       Door got caught head off peasant.

     Moved poezd.Muzhik ran ...

      I'm looking for a long time to see him off.


        Vityunya in the river, fished.

     Sailed past the big crocodile.

     Cracked bone in his hand a mighty
      The corpse of a crocodile swimming in river.


       Pioneer Kochegarov fished.

     He sailed past the crocodile ...

     Oh, and groaned as green morel:

    In the ass stuck pioneering icon.


      Red Square, the green trees.

     A boy walks in a white T-shirt.

    Black Seagull raced rustling ...

      No, do not wait for the baby's mother!


     Boy Petrunka naughty in the kitchen.

    Quiet chef to him the basement ...

     Will now be for the working class

        Forty pounds of cooked meat.


       Pretty girl named Rita

       Ass rubbing a piece of dynamite.

    The explosion was heard in the street Zhdanov
   Feet in Medvedkovo, pop in Chertanovo.


     Mom yells from the courtyard grandfather Cyril:

      -Your son crushed ice rink!

      My mother asked: "Where is he now?

   Now, I had you podsunu on the door.


      Girl in bathroom shaver found.

      "What is it?"-Dad "she asked.

     Pope otvtil: harmonica ... "

    Wider and wider smile crumbs ...


     The girl in the garden in a ball played.

     Ball in his uncle accidentally hit.

        Uncle pouted: "I fidget-y!"

     Long on the fingers blink of an eye.


    The boy walked bravely to the construction site,

       Different buttons he pressed.

     Well-worked-oiled press
    Teplenky pancake fell under the canopy.


     Boy Sergunya "pine" found.

   With this toy, he came to school ...

     Explosion smashed the door in the office
      Meat pieces lie on the floor.


     Bows, shorts, star in a series:

     The tram moved a detachment of October.

      Left tit, tit right
      With them died counselors Claudia.


        The ninth floor, a narrow ledge.

    The boy promptly falls down.

      Bottom looks surprised mother:

     No, the boy learns to fly.


     The guy with the guitar on the field wandered

       Accidentally, he landed on a mine.

       Long moaning guitar and sang:

   Do not fuck on the field gad about!


     Mitrofanych grandfather sat on the stump:

      Oh, and there was a heavy day!

      Long pants flew over the forest
        Here it is, sneaking an echo of the war!


            Beautiful girl

          Lies naked in the bushes:

          Another would be raped,

           And I just kicked.


      Little Roma walking on the roof.

      Was over the roof, and Roma fell.

   In the air, did a beautiful somersault ...

     How long it is scraped off the pavement.


     Children playing in the basement of the hospital:

     With barely moved the abortion building manager.


      Boy Alesha cooked jellied ...

      On the floor crawling, legless father.


     Sergei boy found the gun ...

      Long at the wall koryachilsya grandfather.


                 ** * **


           In the rainforest.


     In the rainforest I bought the cottage.

      It was without windows, without doors.

        And they gave me a wife in the bargain
        Beauty Marusyu without ears.


      One leg was shorter than the other,

         Another was a wooden,

     A left eye boarded up with plywood,

     A right eye has not seen a fig.


      We sat by the river, a skunk,

      We sat at midnight,

      She told me softly sang a song

       And loudly, picking his nose.


     From this song are dead, all dogs,

       And the neighbors collapsed ceiling.

      And I decided, without noise and without a fight

     Pick it up and bang on the stump.


          I will go to the shop

         Buy-buy, I saw there,

      And at night, like go to sleep, my sweetheart,

          I drank this masalygu.


           Oh, what have I done!

           Oh, what have done!

       Zamesto wooden masalygi

         I live her leg sawed off.


     She wrote me: "I broke my leg."

       And I write: "Buy yourself a crutch

       And more often you go out on the road

     To crush your car! "