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Track: DEPRESSION CONTINUES 10/12/2001
Wu: D.J.CAT / KOTSOFT BACK TO AU
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It all started with Batman,
necromancer, decided to make himself a new one
magic staff. Already so old
lost weight, and in public with him
I was ashamed to show myself.
He went into the forest, found a large pine tree,
took out a plane, leaned it against a tree and
started walking in circles. Work
goes, shavings flow like a river, chips fly into
different sides. For greater uniformity
he sometimes had to climb
some height and remove chips there,
but, since magic spells
did not always work, then the height
always turned out different. In general, where
Less chips were removed, and where more -
in the end the tree looked like... like, no
I'm afraid of this word, woman,
Batman was extremely happy.
He made himself a good staff, it’s time
time to check it out.
He pulled out three hairs from his mustache and tore them
them, cast a spell and hit the ground
staff. Nothinghappened; depressed
then Batman. But the Japanese were cheerful,
feeling an earthquake with a force of 6
points on the Richter scale.
Batman walks around the staff
looks, looks for what is not in the staff
yes. I looked and searched, but nothing
found it. Then he went to the bookstore,
in order to buy a smart book, in which about
magic staffs are said.
He enters the store and says to the seller:
-Oh, you are a goy, wise merchant; merchant
wise, and trading in wisdom. Tell me
do you have the book I need?
-And be healthy! - the merchant answers him.
I have a lot of books of all kinds, about
various sciences and treasures of wisdom
great. Tell me what you want to read about
do you want?
Batman answered him immediately:
-About this! - and glance at your staff
pointed out. - Damn this woman
wooden! Well, he doesn’t want to work!
-Yeah! - The merchant squinted, smiling. -
I have a book that you need. And
it is called Kama Sutra.
-In the morning, you say? - incredulously
Batman asked. - Haven’t been here since the evening?
Or, better yet, around the clock
was it?
Then the merchant began to think seriously and
said:
- You asked me, boyar, a problem, but
but apparently I don’t have such a bookand we don’t know that there is such knowledge in the world
or not. You go and see Baba Yaga, she's already
he is a great specialist in all matters!
They bowed and Batman went to
Baba Yaga. She lived far away,
more than an hour by bus, and even more
the same amount along the impassable storm forest.
He came to a hut on chicken legs.
On the legs of these tights "Levante", and on
roof - fox as a collar
I ate it.
I watched Batman, I looked, and
says:
-Hut, hut! Turn to the forest
backwards, towards me - in front, it’s awkward how-
then...
The hut creaked, my legs were numb
stretched out and turned to Batman
in front So he went onto the porch,
sees - the inscription: "Baba Yaga Airlines.
Lunch from 14 to 15"
Then Batman became sad, because
It was just half past two.
He then decided to open the doors to this hut at
using the power of your magical otboputb.
I pulled out three hairs from my mustache and read
spell and hit with a woman-staff o
earth. The earth shook so much that the living
nothing stood. Only the hut is not
staggered, as these paws were on
shock absorbers
Baba Yaga is justoverseas dishes
tasted that she Kashchei Infinitovich because
bugra sent - anchovies, kpebetku and
fruits and vegetables. She sensed it in the yard
something was wrong and leaned out the window. Sees -
Batman stands with a wooden woman
warms up souls. She became interested
and she spoke to Batman:
-Good day to you, my dear. Can I
how can I help you?
-Yes, I’m sending this woman to hell.
canine. Completely out of hand! -
Batman said and threw the woman-staff
I'll ground it. The earth shook again
why Baba Yaga almost spilled the tea.
She thought and said:
-I'll help you, son. Here we are like
once the shopping tour to hell
is planned, if you want, send it there
your grandmother. Non-stop flight and
guaranteed arrival accuracy.
Batman is completely desperate, why should he?
Is this woman made of wood? Well, he agreed.
He wrote Baba Yaga a check and she took him to
hangar They come in, here is Baba Yaga for Batman and
says:
-Take the mortar for yourself, whatever you want, go out
spacious clearing, put your woman there
and that's all.
-But I heard recently that a terrorist
Chechen, Mikhailo Potapych, on yours
ctynax carried out a terrorist attack. - incredulously
said Batman, to which Baba Yaga replied:
-What kind of terrorist attack is this? This is Mishadrunk and flew towards an owl, but between two
the trunks didn’t fit. Yes, these have been for a long time
it was time to tear down the snags. You, my dear, are not
Be afraid, nothing will happen to your woman.
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Track: Underwater
Wu: Macros
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Once upon a time there lived a cool programmer Batman
By the bluest sea.
During the day I caught fish with a net,
I dried it on the sly at night.
And then one day after drinking
He went to the blue sea,
He threw his nets into the waters -
Ethernet with BNC connector.
I stood and looked at the waves,
And he pulled the nets ashore.
Nothing got online
Except for the distant interference.
Again he threw the net -
10Base and twisted pair.
I stood there for a while and thought,
And he took it all back.Nothing got online
In addition to static and interference.
Batman got angry and threw
For the third time, my nets are at sea.
Threw a network with a bus topology
And the optical cable follows,
Yes, there are more hubs for npukopmku.
And he sits and looks at the sea.
The blue sea was raging,
The waves rose to the sky.
Apparently something came across the network,
Batman dragged them ashore.
Lo and behold, there’s a golden fish in a net,
Everything glitters and asks for a connection.
He sends her login by email,
And she says to him in the chat:
-Let me go, Batman, to the sea,
Wander through fidosh networks.
Otherwise I’ll bring you traffic
And then screw your entire network!
Batman didn't like it;
He took and threw the fish onto the shore
A cat running nearby.
So the fish then died.
At this time, at an unclassified base (from
who's secret there?) underwater king
HisHoliness underwent an emergency
meeting. The Lord of the Atlantic spoke
Caprac Bermudovich Potopailo, step-son
Neptune (from first marriage):
-Comrades! I have something more unpleasant for you -
big news!
-Did DiCaprio really fall from the sky again?
- shouted someone who wanted to stay
unnoticed, but rising upward
the bubbles gave it away instantly.
-Worse. - Caprac answered gloomily. - Fish
Ours was dried out. Therefore, from this moment
I'm declaring a state of emergency throughout
underwater kingdom. Don't wander around the networks,
don't swim in the air, eat worms
only canned ones!
Batman began to panic - this is the second time
there is no fish to be caught for a day, and he has to eat
nothing. He stands by the sea and asks:
-Have mercy, sea! Send me at least one
fish!
I didn’t sleep in the underwater kingdom
famous terrorist Osama Aben Neladen,
fatty catfish, famous for its
destruction with binge drinking for nothing
suspecting civilians - in
mostly stingrays lying peacefully on the bottom.
And then one early morning Batman
always stood on the shore and asked for fish.
His mind was so clear andit’s clear that out of happiness he sang the ancient
Hindu song (translation):
No fish are caught in the river,
The waves are flying to the shore,
The moon hangs in the sky
The cat is walking nearby
The leaves are turning yellow in the distance
The networks hang idle,
I really want to eat
Give me...
He didn't have time to finish singing.
After some time the program
"Good night, drunks" interrupted
breaking news release. Announcer
reported:
-Dear comrades! Several hours
back on the shore of the blue sea was committed
unprecedented terrorist attack. B nothing
a suspicious Batman suddenly emerges from the water
a huge whale flew out.
On the website batman.s.ru creeping line
the words ran: batman under att(R)ask!
In the underwater kingdom, supporters of Osama
Aben Neladen was having fun and
celebrated the victory. They poured full
glasses of carbon dioxide and spread on
bread chicken eggs.
But the people on the shore did not sleep. Sauron,
leader of the TaliZhban movement, public
(though drunk)stated that Osam
Aben Neladen Mazdai i Shyt.
Joker, a famous drug lord, is quietly
Osama began to prepare a retaliatory strike. He
was ready to put up with everything except
one thing - the loss of your provider.
Those bpemehehm at the bottom, around
sunk due to Russian negligence
sailors of the monument to Maxim Gorky
celebrated the victory of the cream of the underwater
society. The slant-eyed queen of Japanese
sea flounder Hiroshima Maksimovna swam
on the head of Maxim Gorky and talk
speech (Japanese accent):
-Dear brothers! Today at Fsey Nasya's
A mysterious event has passed away from the world!
Finally nokohcuha with terrorism and
aquariumism on Batman's part. Hooray!
Even deeper, at the base
ocean shelf, on a secret (here
there is already someone to keep a secret from) database
aliens underwent emergency
meeting. The Supreme Commander spoke
Commander-in-Chief Arsenal Telepoptovich
Gravitsap, also theirs
electrician:
(since the speech was delivered in ultra-short
waves, without a corresponding converter
you are notyou can read this)
In short, the market was such that it dried up
their fish - two agents of the third
Reich, fourth generation spy
(apparently this fish had a hobby -
mathematics).
Was urgently organized
committee, headed by a mutant,
Chukchi penguin Saddam Xvostein,
famous for its speed.
The main task of the committee was
preparing for possible response measures from
land sides. B free from
main task while the committee was getting drunk
hydrogen sulfide from underwater geysers, -
simply put, fermented.
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