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(C) DeadMan & NeuronMan^ZX-Generation
Hedgehog from special forces
Night. Half past 1. 7000 underground
(millimeters). Hedgehog and Mole are sitting in
hug under the table. It's on the table
bottle "Bomi" (5 liters), plate
fresh worms that go crazy on
pungent odor from the contents of the bottle.
Suddenly there was a rustling somewhere in the corner...
Through the serpentine of foggy brains
friends receive one and the same at the same time
while thinking: “Telefax...”. They
they race to the car to
with the joy of swallowing at least some
this evening useful information. First
Hedgehog crawled (helped by many years
special forces practice). He reached out
pieces of paper that crawled out with a grinding sound
from the crack of the miracle machine. At this time Mole
tried in vain to pull out hiswrinkled
face from yesterday's borscht, which
he never had time to finish eating.
The message received was from the general
Moose. After some time, with difficulty
Having understood the essence of the message, the Hedgehog enthusiastically
screamed something incomprehensible, not
forgetting to hit him in the face a couple of times
Mole (habit...). The mole has flown over
through two chairs and the table hit something o
wall and fell, convulsing. Not
paying no attention to his friend, hedgehog
started packing immediately
suitcases. After a couple of minutes there were a lot of them
about five already.
Making sure he didn't do anything
forgot, the Hedgehog finally noticed that the Mole
sitting against the wall, trying to make strange gestures
attract attention. Realizing that he
not in himself, the Hedgehog jumped up to his friend and
began to bring him to his senses
professional blows to the face. Via
For a minute the Mole fell silent. "It's okay"
thought the Hedgehog. Having planted the calmed down
friend on a chair, the Hedgehog began in detail
explain the essence of the message.
Making sure your friend understands everything
The hedgehog happily declared: “Let’s sit on
path." Winking for a minute
with misty eyes the friends said goodbye and
The hedgehog slammed the hatch and climbed out.
Since Hedgehog's car got a flat
spare tire, he decided to go
hitchhiking Our hero stood there for an hour
I understandwhat is in the steppe and closer,
less than 100 meters from Mole's house
He can’t find a mobile vehicle.
Then he decided: “Eh, I’ll shake the old days.”
And, tightening the laces on the shoes
I started running to the headquarters. He ran all the way
night and by the next morning was in
headquarters Having caught his breath, the Hedgehog decidedly
knocked on the door of the general headquarters.
“Come in,” thundered inside. Having learned
a voice that is painfully familiar in my head, Hedgehog
joyfully pushed the door and burst in
in...window. A second later, he corrected
form, polishing the medals, moving them to the side
cap and throwing suitcases into the corner
appeared before the one towering above him
General Los.
The general was so porat that he horned
he had more than children. For many years
years of service he picked up so many orders
and medals that was forced every time
wear three jackets that successfully
They replaced his bulletproof vest. He looks like
one could say 60 years, but in reality
he was 59 years and 6 months old.
Usually cheerful and generous
slap the general today
unusually angry, irritable and more
generous with slaps. With tears on
General's eyes and a bottle of Bomi in his mouth
frantically tried to hammer into the Hedgehog at
help chair cause of call. But even
using your full mental potentialThe hedgehog could not understand anything, because
the bottle never left for a second
general's mouth. To the sound of breaking
furniture, lovely legs entered the office,
torso and bust. In a word, I entered
secretary Not at all surprised
the picture that appeared before her, she,
ycnokob the boss and pulled the Hedgehog out from under
piles of wooden debris explained the essence
affairs.
While the general, huddled in a corner,
sucked on his "Bomi", the secretary began
story. She explained to the Hedgehog that they
the beloved general's wife was kidnapped!.. Then
she showed Hedgehog an anonymous letter in which
it was said: "Your wife has been kidnapped. And if
you want it, then bring a lot of money to
prison "St. Joseph" at midnight at 7
hours." The hedgehog brainstormed what he received
information and thought: “Shouldn’t I go
Should I go to prison at midnight?.. "
Having made such a witty decision, Hedgehog,
without thinking twice I set off on the road to
hoping to reach the prison before dark.
Having turned a dozen traffic lights on the way,
pacnyrab all cats and dogs by evening
The hedgehog has almost reached its destination.
But it was still necessary to jump over
a hefty fence (there is no Hedgehog in the door
used to entering). Having suffered, he
with enormous difficulty fell over
20-centimeter fence and, having fallen from
brutally tired, he fell asleep in the bushes.
He woke up froma terrible blow to
head, but quickly drove away the birds,
fluttering over his shaved head, Hedgehog with
stared at the hippopotamus with a stupid smile,
who could barely stand on his feet, leaning on
a lady of familiar appearance. Bringing thoughts
in order and having built them in a line, Hedgehog,
finally realized that the lady was nice
appearance is none other than Losikha, then
I mean Losev's wife.
- What kind of oak tree are you making here?
asshole,” the hippopotamus muttered barely
opening his mouth.
- I'm sorry, but I'm not quite right.
understood what we were talking about, the emboldened one barked
Hedgehog extending his paw to the holster. But not
having found a familiar Mauser in place, he
suddenly remembered that I left it in
fourth suitcase under spare ones
cowards. Goosebumps hurried right there
cover the spiky body of a special forces soldier. They
made their way everywhere, not even on the nose
forgot to visit. The hedgehog has done it again
smile stupidly before the mighty
the hippo's paw grabbed him and
stuck it in the trunk of a Mercedes.
Only when above the Hedgehog's head
steel lid slammed shut
Mercedes trunk, he realized in
what a mess. Trying to open
cover, the prisoner only broke a couple of claws
and almost sprained his neck. Having decided that
the trip will not be close, Hedgehog put
fist underhead and tried to fall asleep.
After several attempts to pull this off,
it seemed like a completely pointless thing,
he finally succeeded. But not
For a long time the Hedgehog rested under the soothing
the sound of cobblestones on the bottom of the car.
Hearing something that came from nowhere
the alarm clock rang, he woke up and
lay for a long time, looking at the ceiling of the closet
Mole, in which, as it turned out, he
turned out to be after a violent drinking session.
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