Impulse #04 24 февраля 1999

Самиздат

tales - Night of the living fan BEATLES.

                 NIGHT OF THE LIFE-BEATLES FANS


                                                (C) MISKA MOLOKA


   The text is devoted to the world famous and cool as eggs,
Boys, known in our circles Thou Vladik / VfNG / jeweller BBS.
Events opisuemye in this text itself does not have 100% 
relationships to reality, but based on real fucKtah and have

directly related to the life described by the master.


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   "Tso is spatstsa hotstsa - lazily moving his lips squeezed 
Vladik dozhevyvaya twenty-sixth pack of Minton. Minton was 
delicious, mint and surprisingly useful for all of 
Vladikovskogo body. Typically, fifteen packs enough for the 
whole night, but not today ... 

   Installation 98'oy Vind proceeded slowly and deliberately.
"The remaining 45 minutes - for two and a half hour show 
vizardovsky timer, and Vlad all procedures Jam. Still - the 
last penny from stepuhi went on this precious CD, the where 
Vlad wanted his whole miserable life, and now - such beard ...


   Raised high above his head with his hairy paw crumpled empty 
pack from the Minton, Vladik looked around. Making the few 
turns her head 180 degrees clockwise and at the same rate 
against the most arrows, an eagle's eyes fell on parked near 
RECYCLED BIN with a crooked sign on Inglish: "Zapuzyreno syudy 
Vladyslavom Yakubovichem". Of trash bore a nasty foul Shmonov 
sneakers and gum, causing the host to the indescribable 
ecstasy. Like the young monkey Vladik deftly tossed a pack of 
chernevshee opening: "Ah, but still as spatstsa hotstsa!


   The timer has reduced its value for another five minutes. 
Only for five minutes, which seemed an eternity Vladik. "How

sorry that I do not take into his mouth - a sip of beer right 
now would not hurt " - Vlad thought, rubbing her virgin pigtail 
misted glasses, every now and then come to the nose. "Go to 
hell" - did not stand in his left leg nervishki and flew in the 
face with a hairy dog, peacefully dozing among the indelible 
socks are washed Vladik not terribly fond of, because they are 
so dirty and stink ... 

   "Chudnenko! - Exclaimed the young genius to see on your 
monitor splodgy inscription "By the end of installation of the 
remaining 35 minutes," and anticipating the coasts of the mouse 
on the INTERNET EXPLORER'u. Spatstsa wanted, I still Minton, 
like a woman. No, Babu Vladik not like - he despised these 
diabolical creatures not of this world and was proud of his 
virginity. Of course, not just the remnants of his male 
hormones made themselves felt, when the next sexy JPG'shka 
appeared on his propeller, but Vlad is limited to two or three 
strokes of the up-down, right hands, then groaned and moaned, 
blowing thick mucus - this it was enough.


   And now he was skutsno. Cursed Wind - she felt
his patience. Out of the house, hanging on the wall, climbed a 
wooden cuckoo and hoarsely kukuknula four times. Yes, it was 
4:00 am - Installation 98'oy Vind continued ...


   "How spatstsa hotstsa - Vladik raised his skinny ass to 
sloppy chair, serves as a support to its members, and sauntered 
lazily to the point. Gently lower your cobs into a hole, right 
hand, he groped and pressed MAGIC-loaf. Jet rusty water gently 
caressed and tickled his ears numb, gave courage to a tired 
mind, invigorates and refreshes. Snorting and spitting Vlad 
continued basking in the jet that indescribable freshness for 
as long as the will of God he began to choke. Wet my pants and 
noticeably cheerful, he returned to his room: "Ulala, now 
spatstsa not hotstsa "- he cried, and adjusted his glasses. 

   "Until the end of installing the remaining 25 minutes" - 
Vlad was in ecstasy. Suddenly, he presented on the site timer 
bipedal matroshku, that after 25 minutes will belong to him 
alone. "No women! "- reminded him of the voice over. Something 
fascinating drunk was in that voice, but not for Vlad.


   "Until the end of the installation down to 20 minutes - a 
timer, more and more stirred the imagination of poor. He began 
the erection and he could not resist ... Lightning its lock is 
rusted and stubbornly refused to resist the rapid onslaught of 
gnarled fingers and pliers. Had to use scissors and cut the 
proper hole. My brush with, All!!! " - Vladik cried when he saw 
his PCyuk. After that, everything was as usual ...


   "Until the end of the installation is left for 10 minutes - 
the timer is no longer worried about Vlad, bleeding, and then 
mud, he obvis in his chair, his hands clutching convulsively 
PC'yuk. HDD indicator blinked savagely, sending impulses to the 
already sodden cerebellum Vlad. As fascinating was the little 
flashing of red lights. Long flash-long-long, short-short-short 
... "SeOeS - pierced subconscious Vladik crazy oil - Save

our souls. My Windu need help. I'm coming to you, my dear! "- A 
tremendous effort of his iron will, he jumped to his feet, like 
professional boxer. 

   The hammer was found not once, but better late than never. 
"This All zvukovuha "- not kontrolliruya their actions, with 
Vlad rage leopard hit card. Crackling and creaking rending

Boards hurt rezanuli to gentle locator youngster. "SeOeS" - 
continued to demand retribution sick brain ... 

   "Mouse!" - Describing an arc of 2 * PI radians, hacking 
device vmyal the poor animal to the table. The middle button 
and jumped, breaking glasses, Vlad has hit in the right eye, 
leading him into a rage. Imagination pictured him invincible 
hero, such as Duke Nukem'a what-if: blow, another blow - and 
the enemy was crushed to bloody pieces of plastic.


   "SeOeS - HDD light fired the mind, led the members in
Fighting traffic, drunk clouded his mind. "Mast
Give "- diskovert 3.5 crumbled to pieces, leaving the mind only
seductive head. "MUST DIE!" - The hammer fell on an invaluable 
body of ... 

   Then Vlad again stared at the light bulb. Buffeted glasses 
hanging on the tip of a long nose and prevented watch. 
Adjusting them, Vlad looked at a light bulb again - "mission 
complete" - was signaled in his subconscious, and he dropped 
the hammer, it hurts fallen on the little finger of his right 
leg. 

   "Until the end of the installation remains 30 seconds" - a 
tired show timer. The cuckoo clock and climbed out of a hoarse 
Cook kukuknula 7 times.


   It is impossible to convey the sweet shiver ran through the 
body Vlad. Pleasant cramps covered all his limbs, heart

filled the unearthly love, soul embraced peace. A nightmare 
icchez and glasses stood in front of a harsh reality, this 
apparent paradise. Outside, the sun rose and Vlad for the first 
time in its short and useless life realized how beautiful it 
is. 

   Early birds have already begun to smear his windowsill, 
soaking up the the first ray of the rising sun. It was so 
beautiful this morning! Fresh air stirred up feelings swirling 
in Vladik, and he cried. It was not a cry of horror - it was a 
cry of joy and madness joy!


   "Installation Complete" - Vlad gathered his perspiring 
chumadan and, moving his ears and ran to the university. Soon, 
in 2000 and then Once again we witness the wild joy of a young 
mammoth, but it will be a different story ...



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                       TU BI KANTINUID ...