Nicron #25 20 марта 1997

Юмор

Humor - anecdotes.

(C) DELEALAN

                *

Goes through the forest of Winnie the Pooh, Eeyore Donkey to 
meet him, but so sad, pregrustny. - Eeyore, are you that this 
is a pogrustnevshy today? - Yes, you know, Vinny, I # $ but its 
somewhere lost and can not find. You are not seen? - No, you 
know, did not come across ... only here say, Owl yesterday in 
the new clips of summer ... 

                *

Pooh and Piglet go through the forest, silently ... Hour run, 
the two are three go ... Silence ... Suddenly, Winnie the Pooh 
turns around and ka-a-to give Piglet between the eyes ... 
Piglet (surprise, rising from the ground and clinging to his 
forehead): - Winnie! For what?! Winnie the Pooh (offended): - A 
Th you go, silent, $% # about me nude all think ... 

            *

Float Winnie the Pooh and Piglet on a river. Heat. Winnie 
rowing - Piglet is sleeping. Winnie tired, but rowing - Piglet 
all asleep. Winnie already very tired paddling, Piglet asleep 
and awake. Winnie swung and punched Piglet oar on the head. 
Piglet's eyes opened, sleepy understand nothing - head 
spinning. And Vinnie, and says: - What, Pig, does not sleep? 
Well, then bury ... 

            *

One man walks the dog healthy. To him and other suitable
asked: - Have your dog has a genetic tree? - Why? He enjoyed by 
anyone. 

            *

The restaurant came a lion and the hare. - I have carrots and 
cabbage - orders hare. - A friend of yours is not hungry? - 
Asks the waiter. - If he was hungry, did we would have come 
here together? 

            *

I thought it was firefly - ant sighs, sitting in a puddle - and
it was a cigarette butt.

            *

Crow flew at night in the woods, but the bitches pi @ # $% as a 
plucked! Oh # $% (Pancake)! Generally speaking, no # $% 
(nothing)! 

            *

Steel Winnie and Piglet climbers. Crawling on the wall. - 
Winnie, Vinny, I crawled 15 yards and drove a single hook. - 
Bay Jumper, fat pig. - But Winnie, if I will score it gets 
messed up. - If you have not zabesh, something is broken both 
of us. 

            *

Flurried Uncle Fedor runs into the house: - Matroskin! Your cow 
calf striped bare! Matroskin with dignity: -Mrpp .. My cow. 
What hochy - then do! 

            *

The ants have gone to war, and one left to protect the anthill.
Return - an anthill, of course, collapsed. Caretaker explains: 
- Passed a bear came. - But you're his revenge? - And how! I 
went and shit right in the middle of the den. 

            *

Is the hedgehog in the woods. And for a loaf of pulling on a 
rope. Fox to meet: - The hedgehog, where are you? - Why, go 
hang ... - Well batonto you what for? - A tail knows how much 
I'm there sagging! 

            *

Gathered two friends from neighboring villages for a bottle of 
moonshine. And the reason: - Here you have a hog, but I have a 
pig, would be nice to bring them together. - It would be nice. 
- So you brought a hog when he wants to fuck. - How do I know 
that? - And how It will be a tail hook, so it's time. No sooner 
said than done. Man came in the morning, went to the barn, 
looking - in a hog's tail hook. Seizing him in his arms, a 
stroller motorcycle, helmet, he on his head, drove to a 
neighbor. Well entertained hog with a pig. On the next day 
looking guy - again at the hog's tail hook. In wheelchair, 
helmet, hog's head and to the neighbor. Again, everything is in 
order. On the third day of the peasant broke out of the house 
early in the morning to go out so his wife: - Go and see how 
there tail hog. Minutes Five wife returns: - Do not know how 
it's tail, but he already put on his helmet and sits in a 
wheelchair. 

            *

Is a rabbit in the woods and crying. He asked: - What are you 
crying, hare? - The wife died. - And who is your wife been? - 
Elephant. All laughed. And the hare said: - Yes, you're funny, 
but I dig a pit. 

            *

Piglet goes to the store. - Do you have bacon? - Yes. Pulls
machine gun and scribbles: - I hate! Blood for blood!

            *

You still with me luck - said the wolf trembling sheep - and 
you're on a moment, imagine what would happen to you if you

met not me but our whole flock!

            *

Met the American and Soviet dog. The first shows off
my life and asks the Soviet: - What are you doing?
It seems you have a reconstruction? - Yes, the chain meter 
lengthened, and the bowl in two moved away.


            *

Is a rabbit in the woods. That wolf's tail dernet, then the fox 
would kick. All flee in terror from it. Towards attending the 
bear. Hare puts tripped him. - What, Squint! - He cried, lifting

bear. - After all, I Toptygin! - I - Kosygin!

            *

Lion came upon a drunken rabbit. Took his paw, sniffed and 
sneezed. The hare woke up and said thickly: - C-listen,

c-old man, you che, in the face you want? P-positive, where he 
took!