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#%# Анекдоты и приколы про Spectrum-сцену
----------------------------------------------------------- --
(c) Cannibal^TL'2oo2
Fast introduction:
- -------------- -
This “document”, oh, sorry, the document was “sculpted” by me
under the impression of Chasm's "OTTYAGs", which resulted in
what you are reading now. Just don't wag your finger at me
and say "ah-yay-yay, Kanny, you're vulgar!" ;) And if you like this
the text will seem malicious and malicious - I can send it to you
nice "tutorial", called "over 30 ways to commit suicide" -
"npuracutb" will help your anger...forever... :)
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Why is an emulator better than the real thing?
- --------------------- -
1. The emulator does not take up half the table.
2. The emulator can be erased and written again
3. The emulator does not have a bunch of wires and spiders do not appear in it
4. The emulator will not crash or burn
5. “Quintuple” discs can be nailed to the wall and
make boomerangs with them :) - the emulator does not need them.
6. Beer won’t spill on the emulator, but it can spill
to PC keyboard :)
7. AdvancedThe emulator allows you to select the desired one
Spectrum: there, Pentagon, or, say, Spectrum +2.
8. You won't get a Disk error if you're not slow. :)
9. Well, all the elite Spectrum sceners are using emulators.
10. There is no need to hit the emulator with your fist and yell: “Are you buggy???
Here you go, bitch!!!"
11. If you have an emulator, you can tell the hardware guy to go to hell,
previously repaired your ZX and save a battle of vodka (more
suitable for Belarusian stagers)
12. While working under the emulator, you can simultaneously listen to .mp3
and other crap.
13. “Bzdya” on irc you can watch your favorite demos in the “window”
14. Having a good emulator requires having a good PC :)
15. What's even better? Think cam.
* * *
Why is the real thing better than the emulator?
- --------------------- -
1. You will be well known among users: the dude uses some
a box in a wooden case that is even a computer. True,
"Warcraft" is bad, it's called "Raven".
2. Convenient information protection. Almost any modern
A PC person will not be able to view the contents of yourdocuments, because
they are on some mythical 5.25" disks. Recommended for
business!
3. Poking your finger at the 5.25" drive can screw up PC users,
as if it were a new super-advanced zip drive.
4. In real life you will not be able to play Counter Strike and Ultima
Online. But there is a great alternative: DOOM demo and Bard's
Tales. In general, Lode Runner and Galaxians are better. :)
5. Real you can use as a stand for beer.
6. The real may burn, but you will learn how to work with
soldering iron Useful for self-education. :)
7. In real life, you can feel like a network “cool hacker”:
because there is a way out to ZX NET!
8. Showing the current state of the real estate to your rich friend,
you can put pressure on pity and “spin” it into buying a PC,
where can I put the emulsion? :)
9. In real life you can show girls an interactive
video film: ZX-STAG!
10. Having real money, you will console yourself with what was once exact
Some of the greats also worked.
11. Pealom can be killed by throwing it at the offender in your hearts.
The emulator does not provide this feature.
12. Realcan be connected to a black and white TV and
draw in BGE :(
13. Real can be sold for two or three hundred rubles to anyone
some friend’s child, and use the proceeds to get a friend drunk
or buy a box of blanks for PC. Emul doesn't do that
allows.
14. You can try to shove Real into a computing museum
cars or (in case of a fatal breakdown) drown in a river. :)
15. You can be proud that yours is real and not vile
PC'yuk and emulsion!
Why the hell do you even need a computer? :)
* * *
A bit of Belarusian humor: portrait of “Body”
---------------------------------------
Do you know why Paul Paulov updates Virtual irregularly?
TR-DOS? Because he is excited by Brom's bald head, and even
chaosite I need to jerk off. Wrecker bastard and impotent, Necromancer -
a huckster and a stinking emulator, Mast - ebyn and a trading rat,
Freeman is actually a fag too. Jews!!! What else? Well, let's drink
in black in Minsk. All of you freaks will not outdrink us Minsk residents!
Well, bald Brom (Br, molar macca - 79,904) site elliptical
does. Chainik opened the treasured doortoilet and tried
lick the toilet, but grandpa (old fart) peed his ass. :)
Oksana thought that she had sucked off Masta, but it turned out that it was
Dj.Psych. :) Natasha doesn't let me! Freeman (the one who is so unscene
pissing in the garbage chute), exhausted from not giving his future wife,
Out of grief, I fucked umnotehthoro Wrecker in the ass. Necromancer jerking off
on corpses, and Mast, as it turned out, generally p..dolizes.
Well, that’s it, stop pi..dealing - otherwise the women won’t give it. But this
that's not all - the rest is in... ASS!!!
2 Belarusian sceners> guys, just don’t be offended, okay?! :)
* * *
When there is no one left to discuss, you will have to discuss yourself. :
Portrait "Heresy".
----------------
Heil, Satan! Freezing at the Spectrum, with numb hands
I tap on the keyboard: it’s cold, it inspires! Yes, today we
we will smear the “sceners”: fagot poser rava from Latvia
sucks dicks. Ahhhh! Black Metal is ruled! Rattling is heard
chains - this is the Vampire who has secured the compacts for review. The scene is buzzing. Well,
We paint faces at sea. Corpses I don't em! Well, I stepped on myself because I was drunk
onto my hair and hit the sidewalk. I was walking down the street recently and I heard
cool metal was playing somewhere, and when we got closer it turned out thatThese are workers cutting down trees!!! Well, let's read the interview with
Pheel'om? Sceners. Drive in the RPG "cool scene". I'll listen today
something heavy; hey, where's my bike? Shackled in heavy
armor Cannibal rattled his combat sword on the table and walked towards
internet send the latest Heresy to the Kovrov villain Ash. Yes, a
The cannibals don’t give “cannibalism” (Belarusian word?), it’s from them
runs, preferring normal women! :) Well, eaten like this
I don’t want to be a partner! What else can I say? Serzh Soft rendered
sadist! He loves to put me in shackles, together with his
friend Nik-O and admire the aesthetic beauty
(www.gas13.narod.ru - guestbook), and Mr. Gas 13 is rushing around c
sketchbook shouting: “Come on, let me from the shackled
Cannibal surreal
I’ll make some sketches!”
Like, guys, right now everything will be like brothers - according to concepts
So that's it. The boundless ALASM leaned back from the zone - according to the lads
punched through. Like, not a jerk, but cool. Conditional compilations, macros,
terrifies the Gopniks with its boundless appearance. Doesn't like
skins (to WinZXAmp'y :)). Well, we're fighting, everyone knows that. A
ALASM is our dude! (ts)
* * *
Stochoallistictypical non-stage view,
Destructorizable, broken on GLASS. Fee for
the entrance is the mind. Do you know the password? No-e-e-no!!!
* * *
Announcement.
Wrecker stage glasses for sale. For complete
satisfaction, you can buy a green Necromancer monitor,
working like a T-30 tank. (set of green glasses + green monitor
recommended for residents of the emerald city). Stage frenzy
secured. Address in Body. Ask Abram. :)
* * *
I wonder what the creators of Body will do when they
will creation exceed the #FF limit? But if anything, it seems to be there
Minimal degree...
* * *
Zytyks-Pinocchio. Made in (Iron Maiden) Carlo
computer software. Pinocchio, come on, guess the melody! Otherwise
death over the curb! A certain gas number thirteen gassed
atmosphere of snow illusion, Pinocchio died a little. Papa Carlo
where are you? “I’m hungover,” answered Daddy Karlo. :)
* * *
Yeah. I like to suck the cocks. Muhaha, if jaest little
govorit po-Latvian, really i think that Russian scene is
really suxx-kinda. ravvah
* Ode to pederast *
- ------------ -
Wow, o Allah,
I am the true ravah,
I live in Livonia and I love drugs
Elevator to the sky, everyone will be Phat zero
Shirka and UFO, aren’t you weak?
Black window and bug.
Phantasy world and the illusion of war
Come on, you, you are my enemy,
I declare scene war!
To destroy the Spectrum
And expose your ass
To make Commador and Spectrum friends,
And camomy leave,
leaving a bunch of crap
raver's texts is her name.
* * *
Why is home internet better than public internet?
--------------------------------------- -
1. At home you can shamelessly watch anything, even the most
explicit pornographic sites. (you can, of course, like me, and in
Internet club, if you don’t mind the crowds of people for you
back and the stunned expression on the admin's face :))
2. While at home, you can painlessly straighten straight away
on the screw any Black Metal .MRZ'shki.
3. While at home with a girlfriend, you can contribute more
intimate atmosphere, demonstrating all the wonders of the Internet,
by putting on some video of wild spanking. :)
4. You can trash xpuctahctbo on forums and their websites are not
Leaving the house (with beer), it’s somehow uncomfortable in the club. (?)
5. If you are a network hacker, you can do cbomum "black"
business without fear of prying eyes behind your back.
6. You can fart, digitize “it” into .wav or .mr3
and email it to someone. :)
7. At home, when you go to specky resources, you can shout for a long time:
“=banned in the mouth, that’s not interesting at all!”, or shout “Pullezny”
warez!"
8. When communicating on voice chat with metallurgists, you can growl in
microphone and demonstrate your growling to chat participants. :)
9. At home, working on the Internet, youyou can also shit at the same time
and yell. :)
10. The previous point doesn’t apply to me at all! :)
Why is public internet better than home internet?
---------------------------------------
1. You can show club dummies how cool you are.
network person Helps develop self-esteem
significance - useful for "elite" sceners.
2. In the club you can fuck the admin for the expired time,
making excuses for poor connection and frequent connection interruptions (for
towns with a dead telephone exchange)
3. While in the club, you will not be able to afford what
You can do it at home - but it develops endurance!
4. Pretending to be a lamer, you can (if you know how) break a pair
banks, and put a mark on the club, and camomy go to your home,
naturally to another city. :)
5. In the club, working on the Internet, you can offer minors
dummies for money the services of a “kind” guy who
will teach you how to access porn sites.
6. The good thing about the “public” Internet is that the paid hours will fly by.
instantly and you will go home, but if you sit at home, then in the heat of excitement
you can "plant" the entire card.7. On the Internet, you can “catch” a virus that will cover the entire
local network, but at home you need to have "AVP".
8. You can deliberately put "Trojan" in the club as a sign
protest against the high price and after some time (if the admin
stupid) rub your hands with joy.
9. If a pretty girl works at the club (kreestaj: read:
"guy" *smile*), then the Internet is either a cover or in general
If you don't need it, go for it.
10. Well, why the hell should I write here? Think for yourself! :)
And what kind of pervert wrote all this?
- Yes, I am! :) But Cannibal failed to outdo
Chasm'a, however, sprinkled the above text. (c) copyright mine.
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date: 21-04-0
time: 15:19:3
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