Echo #01 31 октября 1996

Самиздат

Fantasy - Eris Lawrence "This damn computer."

               Fantastic!



   This section will always be raznotemnye
fancy shovels and zabugornye authors.
Here is one:



    *** THIS DAMN COMPUTER! ***



                               Alice LAWRENCE


  Firm touted as the new cottages
"House of the future, ready today." Externally
two dozen houses looked pretty
usually "tomorrow" was planted in them
technology.


  All the houses to manage the computer:
humidity and temperature, opening and closing windows and 
curtains. Computer command set of robots that sweep and

purged the house, watered and mowed the lawn,
trimmed hedges, cleaned the dead leaves and brush away from the 
tracks of snow. Computer ordering supplies from neighboring

shop, on the instructions of the hostess ran
cooking. If necessary, he printed the addresses on Christmas 
cards, and his memory was more extensive any encyclopedia.



  But despite all these amenities cottages
sold with great difficulty. Not everyone likes to live in a 
house that ... who are smarter than yourself. New cottages 
admired, perhaps, the only children: because they have been 
taught to use computers since the first grades. Adults - that's 
what most part was unhappy with automation.



  House N 17 was no exception. Blanchard family became its 
third owner. Tom Blanchard, recently received a professorship 
in the local university, rather disliked household appliances, 
although not for anything did not admit to it. Betty Blanchard,

which led to an automated library catalog, did not love their 
work and with her and all the computers. She adored

rattle dishes and fussing in the kitchen, and this automatic 
home could not even boast to guests with their peach pie or 
meat, baked in a pot. She is now had to eat almost nothing 
except issuing a prescription computer.



  They bought this house only because
had to quickly move and nothing else to pick up failed. But 
Blanchard children - Tommy, Beth, Seiryu, and Paul - thought 
home delicious. True, the new house was not big enough for the 
family. Had to contact a firm that has quickly made several 
extensions and upgraded computer - because he now had to

serve more rooms. As a result,
greatly increased mortgage payments that
Blanchard has put in a difficult financial
position.


  ... The computer woke up slowly. A few minutes passed before 
he made himself at home with your device and drew attention to 
the strange creatures, moving through the house. At first he 
did not consider them as sentient beings: it seemed that the 
mind can be only such as he - the computer.

He got in touch with the computers that control
neighboring houses, but nothing from them has made: it was the 
lowest level of the machine. 


  Assessing the situation, the computer decided that
in the construction of new premises with it something
happened. And it was not to increase
area of ​​the house and the number of circuits and sensors. He
tried to connect to the university
computer, which was much more him
but he also proved to be reckless. Hence, the case is different.


  Check the connections to their own scheme
the computer found a place where connections
were mixed. Initial and automatic action was to call
maintenance crews. However, he rejected this
thought - because repairs will make it the same
mindless and soulless thing as the other computers. Having 
examined the wrong compound, the computer realized that it was 
thanks to them he has the intellect. 


  Paying very close attention to
family, the computer realized that it was reasonable creatures, 
and quickly found that the All living creatures have their own 
names, which he had learned. These creatures were of one rather 
odd distinction: long-haired called "she" and shorthair - "he".



  Most troubles delivered
the one whose name was Tom. He was absolutely
computer illiterate and this complicates
life for all. Trying to change the program
computer to lawn watering only
at night, he gave the command to cut the grass every
night. In the evening, when Betty was delayed
at work, he ordered for lunch
breakfast. And when he wanted the robot to
stopped to clean his desk, he told him
wash the floor, but forgot to give pre-
click on carpet cleaning, resulting in
carpet in the room was ruined.


  After analyzing the actions of Tom, a computer
reprogrammed itself so that it
became clear to obscure commands
head of the family. As a result, all were amazed at the sudden 
ability of Tom to give even the most complex commands 
correctly. Tom too, was surprised that he quickly mastered

All machinery wisdom but has not filed the form
- Yet he is not some lagging behind
student and professor.


  Evaluating the results of their work,
Computer found that it covers
previously unfamiliar feeling that he would soon like the joy 
of a child who has received a welcome gift. Further Reflections

convinced him that it was sincere
emotions. A few days later the computer
conducted a new self-analysis in search of other
emotions, and found them. These were: loneliness when none of 
the family were not home; then the pleasure that brought him

some teams of children, and finally warm
sense for all Blanchard.
The computer began to think of them as "his
family and became truly interested in each of them.


  Rebuilding the eyes of one of the robots
the computer began to enter information into their
memory, reading the newspaper and other papers.
Desktop professor was the first source of such information. It 
turned out that Tom Blanchard was not a fool - on the contrary, 
he was a highly creature however, within narrow limits. He 
wrote a book about some kind of Ralph Waldo Emerson. Further

studies have shown that Emerson was
rather arcane poet and essayist. On
table professors were several volumes of essays Emmerson and 
computer plunged into reading. 


  The explosion of emotions aroused in him the words of 
Emmerson owned the house, which he bumped into one of the 
volumes: "A man builds a fine house, and now home to become his 
master and challenge for all life, one must settle in it, 
monitor it, care and repair to end of his days. "As a result, 
the computer having two senses - an aesthetic pleasure and 
pride in their work. 


  Emmerson led the study of creativity
computer to the decision to take his name Ralph, and
as Ralph - a man's name, the Computer
will now be a "he".


  The walls of the office were lined with shelves of
books, and Ralph began using robots
absorb the information contained therein.


  Short conversation between Betty and Beth lit for Ralph yet 
another side of life Family:



   - I know that it costs only fifty
dollars, but we do not have. And I do not know
when will. These payments on a house just
killing us.


  Word of the murder were made to Ralph
anxiety, but a quick survey of the health of family members 
revealed that none of the Blanchard's death is not threatened. 
Soothed computer found in its memory the relevant information 
and determined that payments are too large for the family's 
income. 


  Ralph had a complete financial analysis of Blanchard and 
found that it much more serious than the lack of fifty

dollars on a bike for Beth. And he was very
like to see Beth got it. In the family
There were no additional sources of income - is Ralph knew 
well, since Betty Blanchard teams engaged in reducing the 
budget and tax calculation. 


  Ralph did not see a way to pay the next installment.


  We had to do something.


  Upon reflection, Ralph realized that the opportunity
there. Tom Blanchard was a big fan
participate in different competitions.
Most of them consisted in guessing
figures. These figures are party to fit into the form
and if they coincide with the numbers, called a computer, he 
won. But if change a couple of numbers ...



  Then took several long-distance
calls. To save, Ralph called in
the local branch of the telephone company, and
when he joined, began at a frantic pace
transmit five-digit number has not yet received access to the 
code and, accordingly, someone else's line. In order not to 
arouse suspicion, he never called several times the same 
channel. Required only seventeen phone calls, and Ralph found 
that competition provoditsya Humane Society, and the 
combination on vyygryshnaya third time - five thousand dollars 
- differed from the one Tom sent by mail through it yesterday, 
just one figure.



  Ralph joined the computer company
Protection of Animals, has changed the combination and was
wait for results.


  Two weeks later came a certified letter,
informing Tom that he won. Ralph with
satisfaction watched as Tom
read the letter he was amazed as read
again. Finally, before Tom realized that he
won, and he rushed screaming into the dining room.


   - It's a joke, - said Betty.


   - You see the letter? - Tom was offended. - This
official document!


  Betty snatched the letter read.


   - Oh, my God, it's true. You know what
does this mean?


   - That means that I will have a bicycle! - Exclaimed Beth.


   - Nothing like this - cut her Betty. - This means that we 
can do payment on a house, pay the tax, and will remain

Something else what a trifle, just to lift
for Tommy.


  Ralph did not know what a lift, he
had to quickly find out, but he
Beth shared the disappointment. He wanted her to get a bike, 
and hell she receives it! And while Tom and Betty dreamed about 
how they won again, Ralph began collecting information on 
contests, in which Tom participated.



  One of them was a contest organized a fund to collect funds 
for struggle with an unknown disease. Using

phone family in Palo Alto, California, Ralph connected to the 
computer and venture to produce a complete change in 
combinations of numbers. 


  As a result of this operation have enough money to
bike is not just for Beth, but for Tommy, and Ralph was 
rewarded with joy expressed itself violently children. 


  Tenders have been a good help,
but still there were not enough, Ralph sought a more radical 
solution. Having considered several options, he focused on 
exchange transaction. 


  At Blanchard had a few shares inherited from my aunt Betty.
A local attorney who led their affairs,
advised to sell these shares and buy
other, more risky. Blanchard followed this advice, even though 
their actions were only the capital, except

mod house.


  Many of the neighbors to contact their
attorneys through computers, and Ralph
knew how to do it. The trick is to prevent the possibility of
follow the link.


  Using a nearby computer, Ralph contacted an attorney with the 
computer. Having list of shareholders, he realized how

You can do that. One of them had an account
number of which differed from the accounts of Betty
only one digit ...


  After that, Ralph began to study the exchange situation, 
using the newspaper, which got a family, who lived across the 
street. It was necessary to find an option for quickly and 
accurately deal to buy the stake, which

would provide a steady reliable income.


  First, Ralph decided to make the experience. He
chose a suitable company, joined the
her computer and pulled from his memory all
necessary information, and then repeated the same operation 
with another computer company. Both companies chose Ralph 
intuitively, because he liked the word "intuition." Besides, he 
liked the opportunities that it presents in front of him.



  Having the right information about the two companies, the 
prospects that looked promising, he gave orders to a computer 
agent to sell shares to Betty, but did this with a computer of 
the person's account number which is almost identical with its 
number. Naturally, to obtain profit Ralph used the code 
Blanchard. In the same way he gave the order for the money to 
buy shares "TriStar", which is next week

should have been released quite a few
new products.


  Indeed, a week later the market was
invaded by new products, shares soared, and dividends have 
risen sharply. 


  Betty was surprised by a message received from the attorney 
that her capital was doubled. She left the house and returned 
with the number exchange papers and began carefully izuchatat 
it. She noticed that with her newspaper reading robot vacuum 
cleaner, stole behind.



   - So you found out what's up with our actions? - Asked the 
evening Tom. 


   - Nothing really did not understand, moreover,
that we were the owners of a big stake in the most prosperous 
company! 


  Income from the unexpected acquisition enables Blanchard 
safely meet timing of payments on a house, but really

wealthy to call them was still not possible.
The more Ralph thought about it, the
become more attractive the idea of ​​wealth. The house needed 
repairs, it was necessary to replace some of what furniture, 
all children (Believed to Ralph) needed new braces, it was 
impossible to forget about the fees training. And all this 
required money, money, money. 


  Ralph used to worry for my family.
He was upset when Tom caught cold, and when Betty says sharply 
with the children, especially when children are asked something 
like that, at there were not enough funds. All of them were his

family, he was responsible for them. He
knew that the whole meaning of his existence -
help this family, always and everywhere. Ralph
wanted to enjoy looking at living in it
house.


  But for this required drastic measures.


  His first thought was another stock exchange
combination. But the idea he threw at once.
It could go only once, the repetition would cause too many 
questions. 


  Then what? Tom wrote the book - maybe it
can be turned into a bestseller? Ralph looked through the 
latest list of the most successful in commercially viable books 
by ordering them in library, read and returned. Then he

Tom looked at the manuscript.


  At first glance, it was clear that the study of creativity 
Emmerson never become a commercial success.



  Ralph also rejected the idea of ​​creating
invention - too long, unreliable,
doubtful.


  Given an order to establish how people
become rich, Ralph found, firstly, that they receive money 
through inheritance. It fell away at once - none of the 
relatives of his family had no significant assets. Second, the 
money can be earn. But teaching at the University of

and work in the library are guaranteed brushed aside such a 
possibility. Finally, money or something of value can be easy 
to find on the street. But it is doubtful whether Tom or Betty 
someday find on your site packs large bills, or diamonds.



  Money can be and win, because Ralph
Tenders have already tried. But - Eureka! - Besides the 
competitions there is a lottery! And if the winning number is 
called your computer, then ... 


  Alas, things were very different. At the lottery worked a 
primitive machine that threw out numbered balls. Ralph spent a 
lot of time trying to catch pattern of digits, but it was 
hopeless. Need a different path. 


  And such a path is found. When the numbers were
selected, they were immediately transferred to a computer
who sought out among the multitude of ticket
Lottery vyygryshnye. But once participated in a lottery 
computer, it was worth to try to establish contact with him. 


  And Ralf set to work. It was winter and a robot to mow the 
grass dormant. Ralph reprogram it to other works, among which 
the most important was the ability to open the locks and lock 
them, leaving no traces. Then Ralph started a lottery

terminal, standing in a nearby store. C
it has been easy.


  By February, the lottery Ralph was ready.
First of all, he collected information about sold from this 
terminal lottery tickets. Store closes at six and at the same 
time it was switched off the light. In the quarter Seventh 
Ralph sent a robot to the store. Robot circled the building, 
opened the back door and got inside. The draw took place at 
nine o'clock. By this time, Ralph already connected to the 
lottery computer and three minutes later knew vyygryshnye rates.

Turn the terminal, Ralph printed on the ticket with him 
vyygryshnoy combination, included it in the number of tickets 
sold per day and passed the data on it in the lottery computer, 
indicating the time of sale: a quarter to six. 


  Robot-messenger got a ticket printed in the terminal, 
carefully locked the door store and brought a ticket into the 
courtyard. Here he passed his robot vacuum cleaner, who was 
standing in the garage. Acting on commands Ralf, vacuum cleaner 
delivered the ticket to the room where on the back of the chair 
hung a jacket Tom. Making pretend that he cleans his jacket, 
pulled out a robot lottery ticket from the pocket of Tom, sucked

it in its womb, and put in its place
new.


  Lottery Results were announced on television at eleven 
o'clock. Tom grimly listened to a combination of numbers and 
said one word: "Damn!"



  Ralph felt a shiver ran through his chains. What if Tom did 
not check my ticket? Ralph and did not come to mind that Tom 
will remember all the numbers by heart. 


   - What happened? - Asked Betty.


   - Again, I do not won the lottery - said Tom. - Dad, give me 
a ticket - cried a little Paul, appeared at the door. - 
Tomorrow we'll be playing on the bus, and I will conductor.



   - Tomorrow and get it, - said Tom. - A
Why are not you in bed?


   - I'm thirsty, zakanyuchil Paul. - Dad
Well, give me a ticket today!


   - Curse! - Tom and repeated, not looking to get a ticket. - 
Take it, and immediately bed.



  Paul grabbed a ticket and went to the kitchen.


   - Six - one - two - zero - two - two
- Three - zero - three - one! - Chant uttered he read aloud 
accommodation. 


   - What is it? - Tom asked. What are you
mumbling?


   - This number, Papa. Six - one - two
- Zero - two - two ...


   - It's not my numbers - surprise said Tom. - Well, let me 
here ... 


  Having deprived her son a lottery ticket, Tom
stared at him.


   - Could have sworn I had another ticket - he said, turning to
Betty. - Hey, what numbers won?


   - How do I know? Call if you want.


  Tom went to the phone and dialed the number.


   - Write it down! - He turned to Betty.


   - The same! - Muttered, stunned
Betty, writing down all the numbers. - Oh, my God, you
won the lottery! They just said
on television that in our state only one vyygryshny ticket and 
the prize - more than two million dollars!



  Tom and Betty stared at each other.
Betty jumped off the couch.


   - Hurray! We're rich! - She began
waltz around the room, shouting: - We
rich, we're rich, we are rich!


  The next morning Tom called the university and arranged with 
a colleague that he will exercise his stead. Betty also took 
the day off. On this day they do not want to leave from home. 
They dreamed of. 


   - I just can not see this damn computer - suddenly said 
Betty. On moment Ralph was hurt, but he immediately

realized that Betty talked about the library
computer. Well clearly, it's normal processor, so that we can 
not grieve. 


   - We won, we won, we won - insisted Tom, and Ralph felt
of pleasure sing all of his chain. He had never felt such joy. 
Finally, they are happy - and he did! 


   - Now we can afford ...
- They started simultaneously with silence.


   - Tell you - he said.


   - No, you!


   - Then, together, - he said.


  And together they shouted:


   - Now we can get out of here!


  At the moment the house was quiet. Ralph
It seemed that all his chain at the same time
denied. My family, sadly, he thought.
My family.


   - I just can not see this damn computer - echoed Betty, and 
Ralph now knew what she was talking about

it. - I have a feeling that he is constantly watching us, as a 
spy. I live in This house, like an animal in a zoo.



   - Let's go, of course, go away - picked up
Vol. - Now we are rich.


  Ralph felt very tired.
He wanted nothing to do. Only in the memory knocked the words: 
my family, my family, my family ...



  Blanchard acted quickly. On the fence
posters appeared "for sale". Tom and Betty
quit your job and traveled around the district in
looking for a new home. They found him soon enough, then began 
pre-departure vanity. Family packs and Ralph watched silently.



  I never see how children grow up -
he thought - I do not see how they would fall in love, go on 
dates. I do not know what mark they will bring out of college. 
I will never see them. 


  And I did.


  The pain of loss was so great that sometimes
Ralph thought to call a repair crew to resolder those random 
connections. But glimmered timid hope that Tom and Betty

change their minds and stay.


  However, expectations were in vain. Soon the family moved, 
the house was empty and quiet. At Ralph some time consuming to 
control robots, regularly remove the empty house, but were long 
hours doing nothing, when it was especially sad.



  All this time, they hated me - I think Ralph - I loved them, 
and they hated me. 


  Bought a house soon. Alen family seemed quite decent, and 
Ralph was glad that they have kids. Suppose that three rather 
than four as in Blanchard, suppose they are still small,

but all the children. In late August Alleny
entered.


  I will not meddle in their affairs and the life, thought 
Ralph, - I do not want and I will not. Only cleaning, just 
cutting the grass - and all. They I do not care.



   - I'm sorry dear, - said Peggy Allen
his daughter - I know how you want this doll, but we have to 
pay for the house, and we can not afford this purchase.



  We can not, so we can not, thought Ralph.
This is not his concern. No stock exchange transactions, no 
contest. He's tired. 


   - I'm sorry Mary, - said the evening Peggy Allen, her 
husband, telling about the doll, which she bought her daughter. 
- I know this house we can not afford them, but I

just fell in love with him. And the computer ... He does 
everything so neatly, as if alive ...



   - Yes, - said Brian. - Damn,
I like this house metal less than
you.


   - You know, I do not want to be rich, "said Peggy - I want 
to have enough money to afford all

it ... And she spread her hands apart, as
would embrace the whole house.


  Ralph felt in his chains inadvertently ran a joyful wave. 
Well, he thought, maybe a little winnings

the lottery does not hurt ...


                     Translation AS IVANOV.


            PRINTED BY REAL SOFT / NHG '1996.