Nicron #22 27 февраля 1997

Юмор

Humor - anecdotes.

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                  Jokes

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(C) DELEALAN



   There are two friends, one Fingal eye. Second
asks what happened.
- You see, I was in the theater. Well, the show ended, all rose 
from their seats. I look - I faced a healthy aunt, and her 
dress in the ass beating. So I pulled her dress and she told me 
- bam! - In the face. A few days later they meet again, have 
already whole head was bandaged. He says: - I'm in the movie 
was yesterday, before me, the same aunt was. When the film was 
over and she stood up, she once again dress up your ass beat. 
My neighbor has had to pull out, and I take it and say: "It is 
this do not love me! "- and pushed back.




   In a crowded Moscow bus accident occurs French Georgian with 
a leg: - Pardon, monsieur.

- Koneshno want!



   Young man, if you really lay down on me, then do not be like
log!



   On the women's beach landed UFO. From the ship out two
Humanoids in shimmering silver spacesuits, they were immediately
surrounded by naked women and begin to bother them:
- And you came from?
- With Alpha Centauri.
- And you all have these flying saucers?
- At all.
- And everyone can arrive at Earth?
- All.
- And all those shiny suits?
- No: just me and Gogi.



In Georgia, the son asks his father:
- Dad, why a man his fingers on the hand?
- Sonny, the thumb is needed to show that everything is very
well. Index points. On the ring wedding ring is worn. Pinky 
comfortably in the ear pick. And as for the medium know when 
grow up and become a man. Son grew up, met to marry and asks 
his father: - Dad, you promised to tell you why the middle 
finger is necessary. - Listen, son. Here you get married, and 
your young wife wants to you all day in bed to. After that she 
wants and the next day in bed with you pobalovatsya.Na third day

again she wants, and you no longer can. That's when you and 
your middle finger is useful: Sozhmesh hand into a fist, put 
your middle finger, and ... striking his forehead: "You INTO - 
odurela?" 



The husband asked his wife:
- You can sleep with the light?
- Can.
- Sveta, come in!



   Along the corridor Conservatory led by two professors and 
lively conversation. Unexpectedly, a number of runs a student 
and hurt them. They hailed him:

- Young man, stop!
- Where are you located?
- How do you behave?
- You're in the temple of art!
- We are talking about Mozart, we want to share your thoughts 
with the young st ... raise it in the spirit of humanism ... - 
to instill cultural grooves! Student, burning with shame, 
asking for forgiveness and removed drooping head. One other 
interviewee continues: - And here I am taking her ass ...




Comes a man in a brothel, browses catalog.
- This was, this was. Oh, love in Spanish! After the "Love"
asks:
- Look, all as usual! And why it says "Love
in ispapnski?
- Oh, dear, I'm sorry, I forgot! - And starts schelkat fingers.



He is in bed ...
He:
- Can I call you Eve?
She:
- Why Eve?
- Because you are my first ...
- Okay. And can I call you "Moskvich?
- Yes ... And why?
- Because you are my 412-th ...