Spectrofon #18 22 марта 1996

Игры     Новеллы

Fantasy - short story on a computer game "Captain Blood".

(C) Yuri Matveev, 1996.


        MEMORIES Captain Blood

         (On the game "Captain Blood")



   Honestly, I rarely remember
this story. That was long ago, and old
has already ... Although, of course, something that I could
tell. In short, it all started with,
that my younger years, was drawn to look at the black hole. 
Then it was fashionable among the pilots to give the girls 
their holography made against the backdrop of black holes. No, 
well Just imagine, standing in a flying

suit against the stars and behind you the black abyss. Beauty! 
It is only after some guessed at his home in the bathroom 
switched off the light golografirovatsya, Well, we - the first 
- the likes of yourself not allowed.


   I flew for a long time, until the end of my
favorite whiskey. Well, I think it's time to rotate, and a hole 
has already next! So far I have done

what to do - slap
me on the head with some antimatter,
or rather not I, and my
ship, and passed out, I like your voice recorder ... Oh no, you 
do not worry, it works you have like a clock - it's me, so for 
example say. How long I do not know. I woke up when my Martian 
cuckoo clock struck exactly at midnight. Well yes, it is the 
galactic time. A local I I do not remember what it was. I get 
up, and I was so loose, though Arcturian whiskey and took a 
bucket of five larger than it should be.




   No, I did not have then and thought about
that I'll get into such a mess. And how
kerf your bio-computer - so almost gray. It turns out I was 
split in two! That is raspyaterilsya! Well, something like 
prishlepnulo me that emerged from the nothingness of my twins.

Much as five pieces. And the computer recorded their
signals. These twins somewhere in the universe
appeared.


   You know the first thing I thought - Do we have enough for 
all my favorite drink? Only then I remembered that I have it

ended. And then I sighed with relief. But this new attack - it 
turns out I these reptiles their energy and vitality to the left

right hand out. They suck all the juice out of me. And sitting 
out there, unknown to me planets. And myself my name is called. 
AND I still had my bio said that if I do these reptiles

I can not find a twelve and a half days -
they will eat me at all.



   Do nothing - I decide
look for them throughout the universe. Rather around the local 
star cluster. I do not remember the name,

do not bother with questions.
He's not on any star map.


   I planted in the near planetke. Rather not
I - I have nothing to do that
Whether - and fish such Oorksom said. Have not heard? What are 
you? Under communism, in any fish shop could buy. I will, 
however, did not buy but is a separate history.



   And planted my Oorksik on the planet, finds a first living 
creature, and I send signals to the orbit. And winds

we are with him, this being the lovely conversation.
I vaguely remember that he was there I rang. I only remember 
that I told him that my name is Captain Blood, I'm looking for 
those, like him, in-in, clones of their own. What do I want 
this inoplanetyashka said his name is Yoko, he can count and 
that he was a great scholar. Until three, he, in my opinion 
counted, and then became bear some crap about the world of 
reproduction and the fact that he lost his father and mom ... I 
asked him where they live, and he pretended to be a fool - 
nothing says I do not know you took ka-me somewhere, but I'll 
give you the coordinates of the planet where My friend lives.



   Nothing to do, I pick up this namby-pamby and fly aimlessly. 
I threw it very far away, where neither father nor mother did 
not found. And he let's whinge - they say, you've ruined me, 
you're bad! Himself asked for it ... But the coordinates of the 
planet to me dal. I fly out there and I pray to God that this

Stupid me did not disappoint.


   The first counter at the new planetke proved to be very 
aggressive small - in the hands of disintegrator, 
weather-beaten face, yellow, like a melon.



   Who is - ask. I told him about himself, but
he just grunts, but his shoulders cringe as if squeamish to 
talk to me. And even all sorts of obscene phrases go. They've 
got the word "banana" - the most terrible curse. Probably 
because themselves banana color. Well, I gave him - you 
yourself, say, a banana, I'm now on the atomic nucleus and the 
expansion of the universe will post a walk. He gnashed his 
teeth with rage, the microphone began to gnaw and more Forest 
sold, as many as the glass of his space suit splashed with 
saliva. "You're me?" - He says - so your rastak "Yes I love 
you! .." 


   Long we have bickered with him until he
realized that it was useless. And his dark
I have laid out plans.


   Says - Fly-ka are you here on such a
coordinates and put it as follows hated my enemies - Kroliz 
Vary. And I'm, they say, will help ... I do not be silly - 
agreed. 


   Long sallow not find the enemy
had to - fly, look - these are
same, except purple, which seemed dead. And the arrogance they 
do not hold. "Banana you - Speak. - Who sent you? "I do

they did not. I'm not a fool! I have them all around it, 
supposedly looking for his twin, clones, or scientifically, 
Numbers. And they my answer - ha-ha-ha, these do not know. AND

I have a crap about war, about bananas
reproduction. Probably - the most sensitive issue in this 
cluster. Brides this soldier lacking. And one particularly 
chatty, asked if I knew the coordinates of the planet, where 
they live ondonayte. I told him - but what is it? And he told 
me again - banana you, it's the same krasavye women of our

congestion! Here, I have realized what was happening.

   And there was all about rasprashivat ondonayte. And they 
just laugh and blush - and praise them in all keys. Managed to 
find one - every one in this cluster would like to meet with 
ondonayte. Even I briefly forgot about their clones - that is 
what causes excessive passion matters of reproduction.



   Negotiations with Kroliz Vary led me
at the old Maxson, who lived in a very
sullen and quiet planetke. As soon as I saw
it almost fell from his chair - he as
two drops of water was like a madman Yoko -
first to meet me eccentric. Well, most of which I drove for 
miles and miles away lands.



   Gloomy as the planet itself, Maxon sat and barely moved his 
snake's tongue. First, he intimidated me, and then landed - if 
I knew a password. No I did not know the password, but just in 
case say that I know. 

   Thoughtful Maxson said - a friend or
enemy? I, of course, by submitting another.
Delighted Maxon stammered that he knows and
me and what I'm looking for my clones. He told me the terrible 
story of disappearance Yoko and his son asked to find it

then promised to help me find
the first clone. I agreed with pleasure, as a piece of paper 
with the coordinates of the planet, where I took Yoko, lay 
nearby - including trash floppy disks, laser disks, cigarette 
butts and other trash that does not have anything to do with my 
tragedy. 


   After some time, having made long hyperspace, I flies to a 
planet with Yoko and send him Oorksa. But he

returned with nothing. Maxson's son like
through the ground failed. Probably went in search of 
Ondonayte. I am going to Maxon, but he looks at me with bulging 
eyes and screaming that I killed him incomparable Yoko and he 
no longer wants me talk.


   It turns out that this old man believed
my clone, who visited him in my absence. In the end I managed 
to convince him that I did not kill Yoko. Sniffing, the old man 
nodded his head, but on the clone so nothing had happened. I've 
long attempted to squeeze out of him at least some useful 
information. In vain: the old man, when exacerbated his 
multiple sclerosis, and he forgot about his son, began with 
perseverance maniac ask me the coordinates of the planet 
ondonayte. "You too, you old bastard" - thought I went to 
Kroliz Vary. 


   On some planet, it is difficult
remember her name - either kill you,
whether great terror - there is absolutely crazy names of the 
planets, I was faced with a dashing purple, which gave me the 
title of banana and vowing to kill asked what I wanted. I 
responded in kind, same spirit, and said that I was - a friend.




   Purple gunman insinuating voice
said that he would like to kill friends, hates the world and is 
now looking for his enemies. For coordinates of the planets 
inhabited by hateful he Kroliz Ulvy, dried banana promised

me lots of information. Strange ... All my life
lived in this rotten cluster, amassed enemies, but about 
something where they live - ask me. 


   Politely refused, I asked the militants to talk about his 
sponsor, because Kroliz Varets often mentioned some rich 
inoplanetyashku. As I understand it, This was inoplanetyashka 
them in a huddle something of a Benevolent Fund, they had 
always taken the money. Moreover, it seems, and she and the 
other belligerents. 


   Of a long tirade, ninety percent of which consists of fruit 
and reproductive mix, I realized who I needed - Migraks,

rather representative of this genus, tribe,
improbable name of a great gift.

   Or maybe it was the underground name? I
Varus threatened Kroliz emergency and imminent
punishment if it refuses to tell me
Location Great gifts. And then
he got the coordinates of the planet ... Apparently
Violet has decided not to mess with me.


   After a while I was talking to ...
The devil knows whom it
Gift was like -
gray shiny round creature. In the first
phrase inoplanetyashka
promised to break me to pieces if I
it will hurt anything.
He always referred to
on his powerful cousin - safely
Rocket. Show off great wealth,
Gift offered him a ride through the universe. I agreed, hoping 
that it's about something spill the beans.



   But as soon as I dropped him off on an uninhabited
planet - a present burst into tears and began to
beg to take him home. Without hesitation,
I asked him to climb into teleportator, but
he, to my surprise, refused. "You're
kidding! "- my anger knew no bounds. sobbed and stammered a 
little present something ungodly medical benefits. In the end I 
promised him Bold talk from a rocket and he gave his

coordinates.


   Flying to the Bold Rocket, but his hamstring quake - and 
suddenly he was really brave? When I saw him - the fear 
evaporated. The Rocketeer is no different from his rich 
relative. So can be found two Tobacco chicken roasting in the

A neutrino grill. The conversation was short - for the 
Rocketeer I needed information required to deliver the home of 
his relatives. 



   Go back to the planet where I left
Gifts. He quickly jumps into the open teleportator and turns on
my ship. I setuyu that he did not
done this before and quickly sends it
home. Once home, gift
declares that he knows the coordinates of the planet,
he lives a no-no, having
relation to the old Maxon.


   I do not think twice. When I saw
izvala, we immediately recognized him as his old friend Yoko, 
who told me that he was afraid of my clone, and therefore 
temporarily changed his name. Yoko asked to name the square in 
which the planet Maxson. "Square 67" - I said, which caused a 
storm of cheers izvala. Convinced that I am not a clone, to 
celebrate, Yoko gave the coordinates of my twin and said 
goodbye ... 


   Oorks quickly found a clone. Number looked at me through the 
opaque glass heavy spacesuit. 

   First he said that I did not kill him,
but after a little thought, offered a deal. Clone realized that 
I already keep a finger on trigger Planetary annihilator. He 
decided to give me all four clones, and instead began to beg 
for mercy. Naive! Is it possible that I am naive in this life? 
Of course I agreed and he dictated I coordinate the planets. 
Then he gloomily stepped teleportator and was on my

ship. As soon as the clone is displayed in the gateway
I opened the door and threw a double in the open space.


   The coordinates, which he called a clone,
twins I could not find. I probably still the same naive as he. 
He's my Double! Scratching his head, I sent a spacecraft to the 
planet, where he lived almighty Rocketeer. 


   To my surprise Bold Launch greeted me well. He was pleased 
that I returned home Great gift.


   Apparently they had just talked on the galactic 
intercom-cellular communication. The Rocketeer was located to 
communicate with me. He told me about some sinoksov and

said password that are sinoksy ask everyone who visits their 
planet. The password was: "Nothing is impossible for sinoksov. 
I am, just in case, wrote it down. But I am worried about 
clones and how it turned out, Brave Launch knew a planet

which inhabited the second clone.


   So I bent over a piece of paper with numbers zalyapanoy 
coordinates twin. Well well, that was a huge success - so

quickly locate the two clones! Flying to the given planet. Wow 
planet, but I have seen better. Otpuskaju Oorksa and wait. A 
few minutes on the screen of my monitor clone - a pilot in a 
heavy suit. "Doodle - I thought to myself - should there be a 
drunken think of to get into the suit just before approaching 
the black hole. 


   If I did not do it then, clones
themselves would podohli on these horrible planets.
Although maybe I would not have survived. "In general, only the 
wind knows the answer. 


   After a brief conversation with a clone, I invite him to the 
ship. And without hesitation, throws to space. Since then I 
have stopped to shake hands. Two Suckers I

been destroyed - I had to find more
three clones.


   Wandering among the stars, I accidentally flew into one of 
the planets, whose coordinates I gave the first clone. And I 
was pleasantly surprised. Before my eyes appeared a green scaly 
mermaid with long silver hair. The only pity is that the foot 
she was not, but the fish tail - well, a hair's breadth as a

my Oorksa! Her name Traum. No sooner had I
imagine how Madame overwhelmed me
his angry tirade.