SELF-ADVERTISING
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Self-promotion today will be brief:
WANT TO CONTACT US?
NO PROBLEM !!!
14З000 MOSCOW REGION, Odintsovo.
PARKOVAYA STREET 1-7Z to Oleg Fryazinov (OOPS)
and also:
(095) 5991502 Oleg
(095) 59627З8 Alexander
PRIVATE ADVERTISINGS
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- I am replacing one dual-processor computer with two
single-processor in different audiences.
- I will urgently buy the complete collection of programs
for computers.
- The original module that found the pro-
return the sim debugged for a decent price
rewarding
- I read and translate with a dictionary from Pascal
C, Assembly, BASIC, etc.
- I interpret programs and move chickens -
rubbish...
- I invite a nanny-programmer with knowledge
language skills on a computer for two years.
STORE ON THE SOFA
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In the store on the sofa today we will explain
girls, why is it the best option for
them-programmer.
LOT 1.PROGRAMMER.
WHY IS YOUR CHOICE THE BEST
Dear girls and women, you have decided
marry a programmer? You're done
the right choice, indicating
You have a sharp mind and delicate taste.
Let's try to substantiate this obvious idea
on several examples.
1.The programmer combines the best
traits of a person with Down's disease and capi-
long-distance tank. Every evening (for
except in the evenings, when he INTELLECTUALLY
communicates with other programmers)
he is at home at the computer, but at the same time
thoughts are very far away.
2. If he came home at the time
Do you communicate with your own (or someone else’s, without ra-
znTsy) lover, suffice it to say:
"Darling, this is my colleague. He doesn't know anything.
understands computers." The only thing
the inconvenience you will experience is
what the lover will offer next time
will meet him.
H. If you suddenly want to smoke or
have a drink, he won’t forbid you to do so,
since he himself does this all the time.
4. He will never annoy you
because when you, tired, cook dinner,
he is lying on the sofa, staring at the newspaper
or TV. The programmer knows his
place is better than any trained dog.
It's at the computer.
5. You will never have to wonder
what to give him for a holiday. Anytime
triumph he will be incredibly happy simple
a box of floppy disks from his favorite company.
6. You won’t have to suffer in the evenings from
what to cook for him for dinner.Prog-
Ramists are omnivores.
HOW TO REALIZE YOUR DREAM
If your chosen one has withstood all your
validity checks (some of
checksare given below), then get
it will be easier than ever. But let's dare
give you some recommendations.
1. When you come to visit him, ask him
show you his archive. If he has less
128 floppies, then he's still too young for
marriage. If he has more than 512 floppy disks, then
he is either married or already divorced. (Rule
acts in geometric progression.
The owner of 1024 floppy disks can be divorced
twice, and the owner of 2048 - three times.) If he
Your streamer (device) will show you
such), then, in principle, you can oxo-
fight, but know that he is a major. Well, what if
he will mumble that his archive was devoured
viruses, gophers or moths, or say that
his archive is at work, then VERY CAREFULLY
read the next chapter.
2. Find out when the mail-time is for his favorite
our bibbies. Then you won't be tormented
wondering why he didn’t call on time
me. You will always know when he is for you
will call (usually at five o'clock in the morning). And he
will not be offended by you for your children's
some grievances.
Z. The night before the wedding, turn off the power
microdistrict. There’s nothing wrong with
if he is gloomy at the wedding. The main thing is
he will be at the wedding.
4. Try to spend your honeymoon in
place where there is no power supply. And
try not to be sad for the rest of your life
remembering this month.
HOW TO RECOGNIZE A FAKE
LatelyChinese underground
pirate companies produce a lot of fakes
for our products. Some of these
fakes don't even have visible external
defects and have a normal eye shape
and quite systemic red eye color and
nose Without revealing all our secrets
company we will describe several tests, allow-
who can distinguish our product from a fake.
1. Girls without complexes can use
called a test for rejecting the most
crude fakes. Ask a person who
ry claims that he is a programmer, while
give you his pussy. If he shows you
anything different from RS, you can give
slap him in the face and send him away.
2. Being alone with the pronunciation being tested
Say the phrase: “Dear mother!” or "Dear
mom!" A real programmer will immediately say
says: “Where?..” and starts looking around in search of
kah fees.
H. Invite your chosen one somewhere
be where there is a computer and put it nearby
floppy disk with computer. If the floppy disk is not
will appear immediately in the drive or in your pocket
Your partner or, if he doesn't even
asks what's on this floppy disk, it's fake
sewing
4. At the most inopportune moment, ask
him a question like: “Favorite, and the chavaya dis-
is chum salmon good or bad?" or "Doro-
hey, what would you do if they gave you
by frecks?" A real programmer
will answer such questions in any condition -
yaniya.
5. If in response to your phrase: “Dear,
I want you to remember me forever
life!" he drags you not to bed, but to
the scanner is a real programmer.
6. Somehow, being alone with him,
ask him somewhere to scratch the word
of three letters - int. If he writes INT-
this is a system specialist if he writes int-applications
day, And if he asks: “Do you have such
Initials?" - get out.
OPERATING INSTRUCTIONS
Recent research by scientists has established
It is believed that programmers are creative people
That's why they are gentle, easily sensitive, and appealing
you need to deal with them with great caution -
tew. Otherwise, our product may be damaged.
or be beaten yourself, or may happen
there will be a disintegration of the union (family, not res-
public).
1. Never put your interests first
for his interests. If you want norco-
I'm wearing a fur coat, and he's going to use this money
buy expensive peripherals, then I’m not satisfied -
Don't make any scandals, he won't give in. It's better to say
live: “Darling, let’s buy me a fur coat, and
then I'll put on this fur coat and you'll do it with
me wonderful gif!"
2. Show the drunk programmer
Dendy, but don’t give it to your hands. Him immediately
it will get better, but don't let it break
Dendy - you will still need it next time
times.
Z. Try to learn his language. For example
mer, in a programmer's phrase: "What are you,
crazy at your computer? How muchcan I wait for you in bed?" sounds like:
"Don't you respond to interruptions? U
I'm in bed now IRQO the whole system
will hang you up!"
4. If it works, try not to
plug into one outlet at a time
iron, electric kettle, electric stove, tongs,
TV, washing machine, etc..
The programmer who did not save his program
It can be SCARY!!!
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