Humor - Miscellaneous.

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|   This is humor ;))).   |
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 * from: Jaroslav Voronin (SOO:812/25.13)                       
 * then : Vladimir Galtscev                                      
 * subj: Fleas, dammit... :))))                                   
                                                                
 VG> s! Subzh got it...                                          
                                                                
Hello, I was a very good boy. Didn't drink, didn't smoke,  
and did not swear.                                             
                                                                
 VG> Once upon a time there was a cat, but he ran away somewhere about a month ago, leaving  
 VG> inI had as a child a very beautiful kitten, his name was
Mypzik.  But one dark evening, he ran away from me and disappeared
forever.                                                       
                                                                
 VG> inheritance of a horde of subjects. :))))                           
                                                                
And then I began to notice inexplicable phenomena in my apartment. By
in the evenings, when my parents were already asleep, I saw mo-
Her rooms are kind of shadowy. This continued for a week.    
                                                                
 VG> They, suksi, climb into the carpet and wait for the right moment   
 VG> so                                                       
 VG> grab onto a passing leg.But it didn’t stop there. Gradually the shadows began to emerge from their
theircorners and run around the room with a liquid meow. They rushed
on my legs, and I had to wear protective pants in the evening.  
                                                                
 VG> But to hell with them! I wear long pants.                       
 VG> However, it happens that they jump on my table, dogs. 
                                                                
In these shadows, I noticed with horror the familiar features of my missing
kitten.                                                        
                                                                
                                                                
It's been six years. The shadows had long since disappeared, but they could not be used
linger in my mind. That's why I entered the Military Medical School
Academy where they made mea strong and brave man,
part-time surgeon. And I work in a hospital.               
                                                                
 VG> Here, if someone jumps on my hand, he will immediately feel 
 VG> the sound of your crushed belly! >8[= =]                  
                                                                
Now I'm not afraid of shadows. And on dark evenings, returning home, I
crushed all that filthy scum that lurks around the entrances of houses
and in dark alleys, waiting for innocent victims to bite into
into the throat and drink the blood. But the wrong one was attacked! It cost them a dot-
come to me, as I immediately twisted their flimsy necks.    
                                                                
 VG> So, here’s a riddle: is the _HEAD_ important in a flea?            
 VG> Gee-gee-gee. But they didn’t guess right! :)))                        
                                                                
But they continued to walk, because these monsters are immortal and will
live until they drive an aspen stake into their chest.                     
                                                                
 VG> Right now, having torn off the poor flea's head, I threw away the tortured  
VG> and                                                          
 VG> the tortured body of this quack on a white sheet of paper and    
 VG> dragged                                                    
 VG> from contemplating the spectacle:                                     
VG> The headless belly was trying to find its unlucky head! 
                                                                
Once I caught such a monster and decided to investigate it. I'm coming
dragged this piece of fallen to his workplace in the hospital, and began
sequentially, on the operating table, cut off his limbs,
at the same time, he screamed wildly and spittedpoisonous saliva. And then
body stump without head and limbs tried to crawl away from me
like a brainless worm.                                          
                                                                
                                                                
 VG> The convulsions of this suksi continued for about a minute.        
 VG> Then I still felt sorry for her and crushed her to the end.... :))))  
                                                                
HA!  How only he crawled to the saving window, I hammered it
bastard in chest aspen stake. And he calmed down forever. So-and-so
bastard.                                                            
             To be continued...                             
                                                                
This is what came to my mind when I looked                    
some kind of nonsense TV seriesTV.                          
I think it was "Are you afraid of the dark?"                       
Don't be offended (if suddenly). Just fingers                          
kneaded.                                                         
                                                                
 VG> 2ALL: Damn, how to etch them out?!?                      
                                                                
If they are hiding in the carpet, try to take the carpet out               
to the balcony for several hours. They must freeze out.            
Or when there is more snow, brush it in the snow.