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| Цитируя 'Законы Мерфи' ║
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Sting/Infotek
Артур Блох
перевод Л.Беляевой
(ЭКО 1983,NN 1,2,3)
Данная статья выпущена на суд Спуктру-
мистов, для возможного дальнейшего обсуж-
дения в кругах газеты Plutonium. Ниже
рассмотрена, imho, либо философия корен-
ного неудачника, либо оригинальный подход
к жизни. Самые печальные выдержки поски-
паны. Ну что - понеслась !!!
Закон Мерфи.If any trouble may arise
Guess it happens.
Consequences.
+Everything is not as easy as it seems.
+Every job requires more time,
than you think.
+ Of all the troubles that will happen, it is
the one from which the damage is greater.
+Left to themselves, events have
have a tendency to develop from bad to
to the worst.
+Every solution creates new problems.
Chisholm's first law.
Everything that can go bad will go bad.
Consequence.
Everything that cannot go bad does.
Chisholm's second law.
When things are going well, something must
happen in the very near future.
Consequences.
+When things go from bad to worse, in fact
in the near future they will get even worse.
+If you think the situation is improving-
It means you didn't notice something.
Chisholm's third law.
Any suggestions peopleunderstand differently
than the one who contributes them.
Consequences.
+Even if your explanation is so clear-
but, which excludes any false interpretation -
no, there will still be a person who
will misunderstand you.
+If you are sure that your action will be met
titus everyone's approval, he owes someone
definitely won't like it.
Scott's first law.
It doesn't matter that someone is going wrong.
Maybe it looks good...
Murphy's law of thermodynamics.
Things get worse under pressure.
The first law of creating dynamics
Zimerga systems.
If you've already opened a can of worms, then
the only way to seal them again is
is to use a larger jar
measure.
Johnson's third law.
The magazine issue you lost contains
exactly that article, story or passage from
mana, which you would urgently like to remove
thief.Consequence.
All your friends either have this number or not.
it was either lost or thrown away.
Harper's Magazine Law.
An item cannot be found until you buy a replacement.
her other one.
Richard's Rules of Interdependence.
What you store long enough can
but throw it away. As soon as you throw something away
sieve, you'll need it.
Airplane Law.
When your plane is late, the plane is on
the one you wanted to transfer flies away
on time.
The first law of cycling.
No matter where you go, it's
uphill and against the wind!
Ettore's observation.
The queue next to you always moves faster.
Buba's Law.
What is lost is always found in the last
pocket.
Truman's postulate.
Unprintablejargon is the language that
absolutely all programmers are proficient in
perfection.
Gilb's laws of unreliability.
+Computers are unreliable, but people are not yet
safer.
+Any system that depends on human
reliability, unreliable.
+Number of errors that cannot be detected
infinitely, as opposed to the number of errors,
which can be detected - it is of course by
definition.
Brooke's law.
Increasing the number of participants during preparation
than a late program only slows down
no process.
Shaw principle.
Create a system that can be used
fool, and only a fool would want it
use.
IBM principle.
A machine must work, a person must think.
The law of nature's willfulness.
It is impossible to correctly determine in advance which
Which side of the sandwich should be buttered.
Law of selective gravity.
The object will fall in such a way that
carrygreatest damage.
Jenning's corollary.
Probability that a sandwich will fall
oil side down, is directly proportional to the cost
carpet bridges.
Field Law.
You can't fall off the floor.
Vyshkovsky's second law.
Everything can be adjusted if you twirl it in your hands
long enough.
Lowery's Law.
A part is stuck - press on it. If it's broken-
nothing: it still needed to be replaced
no...
Anthony's Law of Power.
Don't waste your energy, take a hammer
more!
Kahn's axiom.
If nothing else helps, read this:
Finally, instructions!
Precision rule.
When working on solving a problem, you always
good to know the answer.
Young's Law.
All the great discoveriesare done by mistake.
Peter's law of substitutability.
Take care of the flies, and the elephants themselves
take care of themselves.
H. L. Mencken's Law.
Those who can do it do it. Those who cannot, teach.
Martin's addition.
Those who cannot teach control.
Army axiom.
Any order that may be incorrect
misunderstood, misunderstood.
The first law of dispute.
Never argue with a fool - people can
not notice the difference between you.
Swipple's order rule.
Whoever shouts the loudest is given the floor
in.
Rayburn's rule.
If you want to live in harmony, agree.
Cole's axiom.
The total amount of intelligence on the planet is the magnitude
constant, but the population is growing...
The first law of socio-genetics.
The addiction to bachelor life does not change
given byinheritance.
Jones's motto.
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate
are pouring.
Fifth rule.
You take yourself too seriously.
I have to end here.
Sting.
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