Total jokes - A collection of statements by Soviet officers.

(C) IRONMAN

   Hello. Here we begin the most complete collection of sayings
unknown officers and warrant officers. Today we present the first
vye 29 statements. To be continued in the next issues.

----------------------------------------------------------------

 (C) Unknown warrant officers
 (R)IRONMAN

            COLLECTION OF STATEMENTS OF SOVIET OFFICERS
	    Textbook for junior and intermediate students
                       educational staff.


                                 "In civilian life you don't need fools.
                                               That's why I'm here."
                                          Unknown ensign.


 1. This is not the place for you - here you will quickly wean yourself from drinking vodka -
     to fight and violate outrages.

 2. At the “hang up” command, darkness begins.

 3. The patrol vehicle is sent forward at visual distance
     memory.

 4. Signal to attack - three green whistles up.

 5. Dig a trench from the fence before lunch.

 6. Tanks advance in small groups of two or three people.

 7. Our occupation is not worth a penny.

 8. It’s like in war: they killed the commander - he took another’s machine gun.

 9. You live like pigs in a den.

10. Sergeant! Your orderly doesn't have a haircut - he hangs on his ears.

11. Short dashes from me to the next oak tree.

12. If you don’t like our fees, we will arrange better ones for you.
     gie.

13. Commanderbattalion does not walk, he takes a GAZ-66 with him
     or deputy tech.

14. Boots should be cleaned in the evening so that they can be worn in the morning.
     I'm chewing my head.

15. What form are you in, comrade cadet? There's a whole major in front of you
     worth it.

16. Now I’ll figure it out properly and punish anyone!

17. After the end of the shooting, training and live ammunition must be
     be restored to its original state.

18. Tomorrow is VAP classes. Dress code: no weapons.

19. Report the presence of people. Those who don't do everything will be punished.

20. Either you stop smoking, or one of two things.

21. Each cadet must be either rewarded or punished.

22. In the next lesson there will be some reduction in magnification
     content of the scope of work.

23. Why do you swear like little children!?

24. Look at me, when I am normal and when I am merciless.

25. The value of sine in wartime can reach four.

26. Only exemplary bedside tables will be retired.

27. Hey you! You will eat through the anus.

28. Meningitis is a very terrible disease. After that they either die
     or they become fools. My brother and I were sick.  He died
     and I was lucky.

29. Do you hope that you will get a C on the exam? Post-
     yat, but it won’t make it any easier for you.