Smiley - “aphorisms” by N. Fomenko.

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 In "Smiley" today we have "aphorisms" by N. Fomenko, which he
regularly broadcasts on Russian Radio:

√ We voted, we vote and we will vote...
√ Tanks are not afraid of dirt.
√ Put your wife behind the wheel - she and the car will hit the pillar...
√ A woman driving is like a fascist in a tank.
√ Windows has everyone who has it.
√ Ivan Tsarevich jumped for three days and three nights until the rope was removed
 took it.
√ EATED A BEAVER - SAVED A TREE.
√ Money does not smell because it is laundered.
√ Girl, you are so fashionable that it’s not profitable for me.
√ Born to crawl! Crawl with dignity!
√ Every man MUST!
√ TAMPAX: FREE DELIVERY AND INSTALLATION!
√ Better late than never, the doctor said and gave an enema.
√ Support the domestic manufacturer... money - use it
 rubles.
√ The devil is not as scary as the devil in a skirt.
√ Call boys! Tel. 02 (24 hours a day).
√ You can’t spoil porridge with meat...
√ Better a sports figure than a sports face!
√ What does this mean: the girl is nowhere?
√ You don’t need to have friends, you need to be friends with them!
√ The same eggs, only in profile...
√ They don’t swear, they talk to “them.”
√ My tongue doesn’t slur, it prevents me from speaking!
√ The chicken worked in the sweat of her egg.
√ You know, sometimes it seems to me that I love you... and then...
  I close my eyes - no, not you!
√ If you do something nasty, your heart will be happy.
√ Relief of hangover syndrome using customer’s material.
√ Calling an alcoholic interlocutor to your home.
√ Crying will not help your grief.
√ Don't give me gifts, but give yourself to me under the arch.
√ A cow is not a girl - there is no point in pulling her tits.
√ Every little girl dreams of the Big One!
√ Everyone wants to have both a girlfriend and... a friend!
√ A bad head gives cowards no rest.
√ Grab your chest - say something.
√ If you get to know it better, you'll send it further away!
√ Seeing you is a pleasure, but not seeing you is another.
√ The further into the forest, the closer I got out.
√ There are so many good girls, but something is drawn to the bad ones.
√ If you have a headache, it means you have one.
√ Not Juan's sombrero.
√Happy people don't wear panties.
√ Our trains are the most powerful trains in the world!