Move #05 18 мая 1997

Юмор

purposely not pridum. - Standards of Conduct belorosskih hedgehogs at work and in personal life.

          Purposely not come up.

(C) SACRED SQUAD


         About the Hedgehog and beyond. ;)


    Have you ever looked closely at
around us all sorts of inscriptions, posters and
etc. For example the well-known: "Protect
nature - your mother! ". Or a poster at
road: "Traffic light is always right." References
such jokes of life can be for a long time
cited. An impression that someone
specially inventing it all. And it
present everywhere and not only in appeals
and posters, but in more serious matters
for serious people.

    Next will be quite serious.
Information that follow -
accurate, but some words are replaced by
and the text slightly reduced. And why -
I think not difficult to guess. ;)

    Somehow I recently came across a brochure
1994 edition, entitled: "Standards
behavior of the Belarusian hedgehogs in the service and
personal life. "Like anything. But
looked through a little work STE I
great fun. The following are
extracts from this rekomendatsionnoy
pamphlets, I think there is something to ponder.


    1. Wearing civilian clothes during
off-duty time in any case not
should be reflected in the way of your
behavior.
 : This is something worth reflecting.


    2. Life hedgehog requires compliance
High discipline, not only from you personally,
but from all your family members, for
which you are responsible.

  : The whole family goes systems saluting
each other, but in the morning check and divorce
on the windowsills with seats, that would make life
Honey does not seem.


    3. To be a good performer
their duties, the hedgehog should,
above all, be a good family man:
 - Do not be indifferent toward
families of their colleagues.
 : Particularly to their wives;

 - Does not exert undue curiosity
family life, your co-workers;
 : Read above;

 - Do not forget a sense of proportion when it
Regarding visits to friends and their
invitations to his guests;
 : On someone else's loaf - mouth shut.


    4. Invite one friend of a friend and
their immediate superiors to
family celebrations, the birth of a child
weddings, birthdays, etc.
 : A funeral?


    5. Respect myself - is, first
all means:
 - Always be clean, taut,
prichesanym carefully, clean-shaven, with
short clean nails;
 : Hedgehogs sclerotic people about such things
they need to educate all the time;

 - To be always sober, never
abuse of alcohol;
 : And this poor hedgehogs in general are constantly
forget;

 - Observe good personal hygiene in the service and
home;
 : The most important time substitution, before
follow the main Hedgehog;

 - Not to participate in gambling;
 : As well as checkers, chess, dominoes, etc.
puzzle games;

 - Never, under any circumstances do not climb into debt;
 : The duty of good turn deserves another.


    6. Respect others - means:
 - In all circumstances of life, make sure that
your mood corresponded to the general
mood, be mutually helpful and
agreeable to each other;
 : Put a bottle pyuka, who will explain what
it will look like;

 - Do not call their colleagues on
revealing intimate conversations;
 : Even hedgehogs love intimately trusted friend
with one another;

 - Being in the room, smoke free
permission, spit on the floor, learn
imperceptibly crawling by the handkerchief;
 : Let me spit on the floor? And I do not know how
do by the old grandmother
handkerchief unnoticed.


    7. Being on the street, be an example
behavior to others:
 - Never cry, do not gesticulate,
not hail passers-by, if they are
away from you;
 : Better once the bullet has not leaked;

 - If you met a friend, remove
hat and say hello to him,
I made a small bow his head;
 : And if the hand shake, that would be?


    8. Behavior at the table:
 : Warning!

 - If you sit next to a woman
move the chair from behind her back, and
only after it sit on their own;
 : Ali in the chair for females about the chair?

 - No spoon spoonful;
 : I wonder how it will look like?

 - Remember that it is better not pour than
fracture;
 : A better hinge than the census;

 - Do not drink in one gulp;
 : Vodka warm glasses?


    9. Behavior at a party:
 - Learn how to sit;
 : Time to forget the old habits. By
about to sit anecdote: Sitting in the chamber
Zeki, one says: "Nick loves Mambo."
Another says: "Toll, like Mambo."
The third says: "Sergei, too, his
loves. "negro, who on the Parasha:" Ruski -
Mamba despises you all! "

 - Do not rest, do not pull
legs, or lean them on another chair or
chair;
 : Yes if his legs do not hold after the inverse
day. Better just to lie down where you stand,
pretend to be something and fall to sleep,
sometimes more asphalt or stair jump
maget. Asphalt disease then manifests itself.

 - Do not fidget;
 : As if a nail from the bottom?

 - Skillfully use the ashtray;
 : Craftsmen come across any more, after
They either matches or cigarettes. The main skill
enjoy.


    10. Behavior on the stairs:
 - If you meet on the stairs or
catching up with an unknown woman, should
say hello to her;
 : How many staircases in the city and unfamiliar
zhanchin?

 - If necessary, to overtake someone on the
stairs do it politely, not pushing;
 : Important not to forget to include turn signals and
siren.


    11. If you removed the cap, then
Keep a shield in his left hand, run-flat
along the trunk.
 : And as always, at all times and everywhere. Well
If a winter hat?


    12. Tie must be exactly
bisector of the angle composed corners
shirt.
 : It is not difficult to do without
calculations. And the corners of a shirt is better
nailing studs that did not move.


    13. The behavior of the service:
 - If you are wearing tinted glasses,
they should be modest;
 : Modesty adorns the hedgehog, and
especially his glasses.

 - If you're in shape, you may not: take
lady's arm, pushed in front of children
carriage, wear DHW. bags, parcels and
etc.;
 : Well, the lady understand everything it can, and for
thigh, and a wheelchair can be a drag, but
Here's bags, parcels, etc. - That's for sure
for the lady who first his thigh.

 - If you are accompanying a senior in
title, go to his left;
 : It depends on what dose received older.

 - Ensure that your vehicle (motorcycle,
bike) has the same clean look as
and your form, and his additional
equipment must be kept in
perfect order.
 : Well, well. Wheel brush on the bumper -
arrows hover. Well as additional
always in order, because You can pick up
something inadvertently.


    14. At a reception at the civil authorities:
 - In the office it is advisable not to smoke, even
if you allow it, but if the source
treats you a cigarette, do not give up and
Serve it with fire;
 : Y stenochki until leaked.


    15. Public ceremony:
 - As soon as say hello to
present figures, while
Try no one around;
 : Message Belrad: "The second day
continued public ceremony.
Local hedgehogs greet
present and coming leaders,
nobody avoiding affection and attention.
The first batch had already been sent to
purpose;

 - After the ceremony, say goodbye to
all officials;
 : If it is to whom to say goodbye.


    16. Presentation of awards:
 - If awarded hugs and kisses
you about the award, in no
If not respond in kind;
 : And if touched?


    17. Principles of comity with respect to
Head:
 - If you are accompanying a head on
car, it is your duty to discover and honor
close the door when it is landing or
exiting the vehicle;
 : He is the chief no longer be able to:
"Our office and the dangerous and hard - we drink from
morning to morning. "


    18. A visitor came by night:
 - During the night shift to observe
some caution, before
open the door, make sure you are with
the visitors are not threatened, no
danger; thus do not forget about
hospitality and courtesy that
are the characteristics of each
conscious hedgehog;
 : First spike drag, gas
pshiknut, and for so politely and unobtrusively
plant, hospitality and courtesy,
feature of every conscious
hedgehog.


    19. Conflict.
 - Try not to fall into the middle
the crowd, looking up from the unit, you
find yourself in this case in a dangerous
position; your task - to break
immediately from the crowd and take their place in
ranks;
 : Even with broken legs. Hedgehog - it
collective being without their kind
he just does not maget not only drink vodka,
and repair orders.


    About hedgehogs - the anecdote.
Rides on the field Atara hedgehogs, dust -
column. And most important hedgehog, which
raised himself forward, cried: "Stand!"
All hedgehogs stopped. Chief of
pride in having examined all the flock: "Well, quite
like horses, eagles lads! And now graze!