Optron #40 03 октября 2000

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Litstranichka - Murphy's laws of action on the issue of electronic publications (a story about an assembly PCP).

          The laws Murphy

      on the issue of electronic publications


  {} Paul Vysotsky, 2000


  Theorem "Optron"


  Free electronic edition ever
does not come out in time.


  Laws "OPTRON"


  I Act covers:

  The artist always draws a picture to "cover" with a delay.


  Corollary:

  1) If the picture painted in time,
artist does not have time to pass it to the editor.

  2) In time passed just such a picture that is so bad, that 
may not be published. 


  Act II Music


  By category numbers never comes
music available to the publisher.


  Corollary:

  1) in time redaktsiiyu fall only
the melodies, which are not podtseplen player;
while in the editorial had not at hand
programs that could fix it
position.

  2) As soon as the next edition of the newspaper is published, 
the editorial makes it clear that his music is not ideal for 
this and the next number. 


  Act III dating


  During final assembly of the newspaper editorial is always 
forgets to fix the date of its publication.



  Consequence:

  If the wording did not forget to fix the release date, the 
newspaper anyway does not go that day.



  Act IV unnecessary edits


  The more difficult to amend the text of the newspaper on
the next stage of its assembly are any changes, the more likely 
that later These changes will be superfluous and would have to 
redo everything again. 


  Act V mirror editing


  The more people who edit the text and the
more editing stage
took place, the text becomes worse.


  Consequence, a paradox:

  Unedited text in general anywhere
no good.


  Act VI of excess


  The more people engaged in production of newspapers, the less 
it goes. 


  Consequence, a paradox:

  If the editorial board takes at least one of
staff, the newspaper generally does not go
long time.


  VII Paradox Editing


  If the author considers his job very well, the wording 
necessarily exists a person who thinks it a terrible and

"Freeze" of its publication.


  Corollary:

  1) If the author did not like his job
and he sends it for publication,
since he still does this,
Work gets rave reviews
All editorial staff.

  2) more like the author to his work
and the more members of the editorial board share
his view, the less likely that
This work will be published at all.


  Act VIII inhibition


  The greater good and interesting material gathered for the 
newspaper, the more retained its output and increases the 
probability that they become completely irrelevant.



  IX law prejudiced reader


  The better and more interesting number, the more
desire in the reader that before anything
not written in the newspaper, write a skeptical
review.


  Consequence:

  Any criticism of the oppressive and detrimental to the Editor.


  Consequence, a paradox:

  In the absence of criticism of the desire to work
generally disappears.


  X Act quarrelsome


  The author is always dissatisfied with what changes were made 
in his work, and the editor is always dissatisfied with the 
fact that the author does not take into account his wishes.



  Consequence, a paradox:

  If the author and editors are no longer
differences exist, then either this author perstaet write for a 
newspaper, or itself Newspaper vskorsti closes.



  Conclusion:

  People who have their own ideas and that
engaged in some common cause to implement them, never able to 
get along with each another.


  Together without disputes are only those
who never sees and does not want to see
the results of their work.