Lprint #09 05 июля 1997

Юмор

Smile - Collection of jokes Minsk Radio-Engineering College.

                          Smile

(C) Mentat 'MiMa


      Collection of jokes Minsk Radio College.

             NAPARTNAYA PAINTING.

Collected in the form of conservation (on disk) as a 
consequence of global cleaning party (in college came 
Commission ...) 

Toilets (type sartir):


     Writing on the walls of the toilet

     Alas, my friend, no wonder -

     Among the crap you all poets

     Among the poets you shit ...


     Do not throw in the bull ochok,

     Put on the toilet - we have a smoke again.


     Boys! Do not throw cigarette butts in the bins - they 
become wet and poorly 

      puff!


     - Do not drink from the toilet,

       It bacilli and infection!

       Dern handle water Slay,

       Foam sduy - then we will drink!


     - Of course, if you look at me from above, below me
    like it is not, although the side is completely visible!
FS:

       If you collect all urine

       And use a skill,

       You can sun obostsat -

       That would be hissed!


       Even if alcohol will freeze - all the same it will not 
give up 

       I will gnaw his teeth - because he's good.
202:

     - It's not in the crotch, but the love and tenderness ...


     - Want to be strong as steel -

       Drink products, "Krishtal!


     - Our will is not broken,

       Drinking, drink and we drink!


       My milenok Feuerbach

       Quarreled with Hegel.

       Tore his shirt

       And hit the furniture ...


       Hey, let's go to the barn,

       Revered Kant.

       Like everything with him, took ...

       Oops, forgot a glass of something!


       In the open field stars shine,

       A market beer whip.

315:

     - Everyone is a lecturer in there ... the vector,

       Smarter than the lecturer, the vector of length.


     - Do not hit the flies are like BIRDS!

       Below: Beat the birds, they are like flies!


     - Mochilas Are you at night, Desdemona?


     - Asleep in class - so do not voshrapi, so as not to wake
    your neighbor ...


     - Kab I meu vyadro smyatany

       And pouna reshata blinou -

       Macau, I would have bliny smyatanu,

       I on the X ... I tvaya Lubo!


     - I e. .. to everything,

       In addition to sewing, and a nail:

       Shyla acute infection,

       Nail finally can e. .. impossible.


     - Shoot you in the morning early,

       become Kurt from Nirvana.


       When the Earth was not yet considered

       And the mind does not know about the universe

       One friend gave a primitive eye.

       And so it appeared the military.

210: not to spoil the figure,

       Helps SEPULTURA!!!

 SPEAKERS (the best):

 Slabuho IV (Psihologitsa):
    With language, people will know what was said.
     Feel when your hands are tired - you can not go longer.
    If people can not, then it is a language ...
    Divide the circle diagonally!
    If I have reached boiling point, I take a fist ...
 Roma: Sadism - the self-flagellation anyone.

        If the mosquito lays, roughly speaking, eggs ...
Vovan: Here, for example, Lenin - has written 23 volumes of 
memory. 

  She: Who's talking out loud?
The answer: you.

 Mackiewicz IJ (Matematichka):

            - We must somehow tg x birth ...

            - I do not know ...

            - Okay, sit down, myself.

            You tell me the brackets, then put the sticks.

 Anatomy:

   Lecturer: Where to measure the pressure?

      Vovan: In the clinic.

Cat AA (Just teaching):

             - And you are talking about? ..

                (Instead of greeting)

             - Material that which quartz.


             - Cable joins Que antenna.

             - San Sanych may not Que, and raw?

             - No, not raw, and Que.

 Khachatryan, YM (Physics professor):

            To the moon, many, many millions of miles ...

            Optical path.

            The more lines in a diffraction grating, the

             stronger and more powerful states.

            Transformations were carried out such that from the 
ball 

             went to the globe.

            Cone-type cylinder.

            Insights are not only religious, but also

             researchers.

            Burned Giordano Bruno at the Vatican. Believed that

             The Earth is the center of the earth, the sun 
appeared. 

            To know, need a lot of time to write.

            Schrodinger equation is derived as no one can

             do not know.

            Draw me these posters, so I have everything in the 
count              Ledge taken.


            The device is used for solar

             electricity ...

            I'll let you go so you do not have goats

             remission

          About how many joules in electron-volts:

          - Sections on the electron Volts and get ...

          - And now I finally ...

          - We do not want to end.

Ilyin, MI (Professor of Education):

            I have this university held behind-...

Hehneva VF (Teacher of radio disciplines):

            Practical methods of enhanced harmonics.

            pn-junction diode electrovacuum ...

Korolkov VS (Associate professor of physics 'great man'):

            - You filed it, and he gave up ...

                (From the field of quantum mechanics)

            - Maxwell derived his equation from the analysis

             paper.

            - While Maxwell did not put his penis was very

             good.

                (About Maxwell's equation)

            - Periodic table you see ...?

               (Question IV-th year of college ...)

            - Just we got off the axis ...

            - It was heard at a glance.

            - Oh - comma ...

            - Let this path - and it stretched area.

            - For very low frequency sounds.

WW: Thank you very much, I sincerely neighing with these jokes, 
and remembered something similar when I studied:


Stu.: - I am in the end you do not gofer!
Teachers: - I'm in your girl ...?

         Not a fictional story:
 Teaching of Russian literature, imagines that he is psychic 
(!). We (All groups) not learned the "Letter to Mother." 
Actions of teaching: In the player play a record with romance 
in these verses. Us (40 dug healthy men) were forced to sing 
along. The spectacle of huge! Sitting the whole Group (each a 
child elephant's ear come) and grossly so, and not harmonious 
howls. But it's flowers! Surviving from the mind of teachers, 
approached each and grabbed the side, with the sagely nodded. 
Estimates were made in accordance with its "Feelings"! If it's 
something not happy, she screamed in his ear: "I can not hear 
you! "(that is, until it did not reach biotoki ...), and the 
poor student Basil louder. But suppose that, had he even read 
the whole district a roar: "Are you still alive my old lady .." 
- If the "action currents" did not reach it, then deuce was 
provided. But most of the dirty all this that the laugh was 
strictly forbidden, so we all were purple from tearing us to 
laughter and to the best of who blowing his nose, who was 
coughing, who just writhed in silent pantomime (all It was 
convulsively, and with anguish).