FIDO-pranks - A short guide for children on assembling a home computer from surplus goods.

 FIDO pranks!


                             K O R P U S O K

   A short guide for children on assembling a home computer from non-
liquids.

   There is a small case on the table - not low, not high, not lying down, not
SLIM, and a power supply with it. A click mouse was running.
   - Here, here. Who lives in the little house?... No one. I will live here
guard the building, run in the yard, sleep on the rug.
   Suddenly the “knock-knock” sound is heard again.
   -Who lives in the building?
   - It's me, clicky mouse.
   - And I have a motherboard scratched with a screwdriver, dented by life,
SX-25, baba berry again, your whole life is ahead, even if it’s under
Windows-NT.
   - Well, since it’s under NT, then come on in.
   Suddenly - here, there.
   - It’s me, blinking video, Trident-256, allow me for a moment -
where should I sit in the ISA slot?
   - Why not sit down if there is room? Five slots, you can
choose.  Only the one on the edge is better, he works, but about the main
I don't know the exact ones.
   Suddenly - knock-knock again.
   -Who lives in the building?
   - I, a click mouse, I am a blinking video camera, I am a motherboard,
a little dented, and the processor is with me, wise as a professor, and you
who?
   - And I’m a cartoon, lost in bytes, with me are the trains to the Vinces -
tepy and disk drive work great in dry weather.
   Well, come on in, sit in the ISA slot. Better, of course, is that one -
as spacious as an armchair, don’t even think it’s cracked. Let's live-bylive, drive bytes.
   Knock-knock - beep-beep.
   - It's me, the keyboard, the dusty fool. Three keys are missing
the rest sink. There are no Russian letters, instead of 'Y' - 'Z'. If me-
I’ll wash it, I’ll earn some money, maybe.
   - Well, come, plug into the socket, we’ll have fun together!
   - Cough, cough, how many years, how many winters! It's me, megabyte sim.
   - Sim? Go! Yes, you're probably beaten?
   - Am I beaten? The Lord is with you! In ten years there have been only three failures. Us-
I got out of the way, wipe your feet with alcohol...
   - Okay, come in. I'm a motherboard like a snow shovel. At least
and without cache, but incredibly good. Come in, son, there's your nest on
30 legs.
   Knock-knock.
   - I'm a VGA monitor. 640 by 480 and nothing more. There's something wrong with me
given, it has a protective screen. Doesn't protect against anything, but watch
interferes: you'll run away in an hour - that's good for the eyes. Connect
me to see, we’ll play blinking games together.
   Knock-knock.
   - Who's coming to our house?
   - It's me, CD-ROM. Single speed, without PLAY button. Don't drive me away
Nya, sorry. I won’t work, that’s understandable - the interface is very
not standard, but I’ll put it in the window instead of a plug: there’s no benefit,
but a little more beautiful.
   Someone is coming again.
   - Knock-knock, who lives here?
   - I, the mouse-click, I, the vidyushka-blink, I, the mother's pla-
that one is a little old, but with me the processor is thick, healthy,
five-volt.  And also I, a cartoon, lost bytes, I, a keyboard
tour, dusty fool and CD-ROM,This is where we live together. Another sim, and figs
with it, and also a monitor.
   - Monitor?  And I’m a MAXTOR hard drive, roaring like a diesel tractor.
Half of the cylinders are missing, the rest are bad. But five megabytes remain
moose, this is not such a small thing. I keep all the best in
world - DOS, Norton Commander and F4 text editor.
   - Knock-knock!  I have a five-inch disk drive from ISOT, don’t give me
finger in mouth. I chew floppy disks like a housekeeper candy. And proud - not
I read everything, I have my own format.
   - And I’m a cartoon, I’m a bit lost in bytes. Come on, drive, take it
the train is that one, stick it in the back, for the sake of order. We'll be with you
coo and flirt, send bytes to each other.
   - And I have a 2400 fax modem, completely new. Don't persecute God
Di, it lay in a warehouse for ten years. I keep the connection firmly, stay-
It's no use pouring me in.  And I catch bizi before it starts,
In short, you won't be bored.
   - Knock-knock!  Hello bro, I'm AWE-32, the sound card is famous
melty, very cool, only a little broken. I mean, I don't play.
Can I sit on the edge?
   - And I’m a Robotron printer, 9 needles - 2 broken, 2 lost,
2 broke off, 2 became dull, only one remained, although it was rusty. B
In general, I'm a bad typist, but I can tear paper. So good
I know how to tear, which can be used instead of a shredder.
   Well, friends, a complete set with peripherals. It's time to turn it on
three or four in a row. Mouse-clicker boxesclosed, screws closed
rutile and shouts out the window: “Well, shall we sit down on the path?” Let's give
a solemn oath, guys: from each according to his ability to work,
each - half a kilowatt."
   - I, the mouse-click, I, the vidyushka-blink, I, the mother's pla-
the one in the middle is the patch, I, the processor, hot as an aggressor, I,
cartoon, bytes bewildered, me, keyboard, dusty fool, me,
CD-ROM, you can’t cut it out with an ax, I, sim, ten years, ten winters, I,
monitor, colored like a tomato, I, disk drive, healthy as a chest of drawers,
I, AWE-32, mentally pronounce the words, I, a fax modem from forty
microcircuits, I, the Robotron printer, roar like a mad elephant, and I,
Winchester, we all solemnly swear together: to work for another hundred
years without failure, without knowing fatigue and peace!
   - Turn on the power button. she's right here. On the back,
If you look carefully, you can notice such a thing,
there is a gap under it, and if you put your hand into the gap, then in the depths there will be
elbow to the right there will be like a small ditch, and in it, a little
deeper somewhere, the button is a little up and to the left. Press it quickly.

   Bang bang!  Click!  The case started smoking! Sparks flew in sheaves,
smoke billowed out.  The power supply smokes and cheerfully says: "
Sorry brothers, here on the network it turns out there are 220, but I calculated
tan at 110 - no, to hang a transformer! But you are not fight-
Be careful, everything is covered, my protection has already worked! True, right awayI couldn’t switch off - I hope I didn’t burn anyone there?”
   The tale ends here: silence was his answer.