Rest - in the rest room there are jokes from FIDONET and jokes that happened to me.

-----===== R E L A X --- O R T Y H A Y!  =====-----

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Today in the rest room there are jokes from FIDONET and jokes that happened
being with me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Maxim Taradin, TH AUG 29 1996 09:13
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                         SAD SONG.

                     I couldn't hear enough of the BBC
                      I wish I had seen enough of CNN,
                  I would live peacefully in the CIS now
                     And I would have graduated from vocational school.
                    And I would work for myself in the AFC,
                 And he joined some housing cooperative.
                    In the evenings I would watch KVN
                   And I would go to the DND for time off.
                On Saturdays I would drink beer with DDT,
                   After the fight he ended up in the bullpen.
                     Still, the native KGB with the Ministry of Internal Affairs -
                      This is not the CIA or the FBI.
                    I wish I had served my time in the Air Force,
                    I would carry the AKM for a couple of years.
                  Finally received treatment at the LTP
                   From the habit of consuming fuel and lubricants.
                     But I left my native CIS,
                    And now I’m sitting in such a DRM.
                    All the furniture is a chipboard bed,
                   And that one, as it turned out, was used.
                    But someone bought JVC,
                      And others are IBM with VGA.
                   They drive around, scoundrels, in BMWs,and they work, I guess, in LTD.
                  Eh, I wish I could get an armored personnel carrier for a day
                   Yes, take LSD for courage.
                  I would smash everything to such EBN-
                      OOP itself will be jealous.
                      In the meantime, I'll finish smoking BT,
                    I'll read a couple of chapters from the Criminal Code,
                      I'll fall on the chipboard PTA
                   And I’ll forget myself in a heavy sleep
---------------------------------------------
Buy a herring and fool her.
--------------------------------
Manhood is intelligence??? 
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                          ** ** **                      

And now - real stories that happened to me over the past
month.
------

Instead of "short circuit" I once said: "short circuit"
HAZARD".
-----------

    One person (a somewhat advanced user) comes up to me
and says:
    -And there is a feature in assembler that allows you to cleanly
program in machine codes?
---------------------------------

    Another, knowing that we are publishing a COMPUTER magazine,
asks:
    -How many PAGES will you have?
------------------------------------

While disassembling TR-DOS ROM, I came across the coolest
sequence of commands I have ever seen:

LD HL, address somewhere in RAM
LD(HL),#C9 ; especially for dummies: RET.
JP(HL)

That's it...
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 In English "boobs" would look likesomething like this:
                       B A L L B A S S
----------------------------------------

The paradox that leaves out all the pussies:
the more megahertz clock speed a computer has, the more
worse: works slower. After all, after every machine cycle
the processor has to drag a cart and a small cart behind him
these same megahertz;  but then some BK'ha is the most
fast computer!
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