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-= amazement number thirteen =- #
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(c) ice'di^triumph, 2oo2 # # ###
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Ufff! It's finally come to an end
psychosis with the number 1e. :) This part is called type
"f". u here is the end of the report from CSP'2oo2 and
parody story "Vaseline Attack",
concerning hostage-taking events in
Moscow. don't take him seriously, that's all
just a joke. If he offends someone, in advance
I apologize... ;)
:#%###########:: Vaseline Attack ::##########%#:
In the evening, on the eve of the release of Psychoz 1ewas
committed daringly terroristic in nature
an act whose perpetrators are 5o Chechens.
the apartment was targeted by terrorists
Pastora, where he hid the beer produced at the factory.
at the time of the terrorists' capture of Pastor'ovsky
dwellings, he /pastor/ once again looked at
video cassette recording the destruction of New York
skyscrapers.
Now, your correspondent is leading
report near the site of the terrorist attack. let's listen
him.
- tsey, can you hear us? yitsey!
- Yes, I can hear you perfectly. so I'm now
I'm standing under Pastor's windows and can see
unclear swaying shadows. there's something going on there
but what is unclear. The authorities do not give any
comments on this matter.
- itsey, you can tell us how so
it turned out that 5o Chechens were suicide bombers, with
tons of Vaseline, were able to unnoticed end up on
the site of the terrorist attack, and take Pastor hostage?
- The terrorists were probably preparing for a terrorist attack
long before it happened, and as they say
authorities, Vaseline in the pastor's apartmentbrought in
during the last six months.
- good yitsey. We'll stop here for now with
Contact you and we’ll tell you what we know.
was the first to broadcast the requirements
The terrorists turned out to be a Tambov child, who knows?
like being in a pastor's apartment. tomatoes, peppers, beer, cigarettes, marijuana and
hid in their homes. the patriarch asked
Islamic spiritual leaders to influence
terrorists. People crowded around the parsonage
people. some with painted lips and
fake tits offered themselves in exchange for
hostage, others demanded the storming of the pastoral
apartment, and everyone else wanted bread.
It’s amazing how people in camouflage and masks
were able to get to the pastor past the attentive
old women/possibly bribed, investigation
finds out/. - Now let’s return to the ice, which is already
got a little drunk on beer and demands a live broadcast.
Hello, how are you doing there?
- Attention! terrorists through pastor
put forward a number of demands. If these requirements are not
will be carried out, the Chechens threaten to rape
pastor all the time. There are three requirements in total. first,
Russia enters Chechnya. Second, allow
free sale of Vaseline. u third, stop
war, now, ahem, according to them in Russia, and
not in Chechnya, because the first demand is terrorists
considered done by default.
- Oh God! what monsters! Is it known how
Did the hostage himself react to this?
- Yes!.. At this very time Pastor
leans out of his apartment window with a poster
"Don't shot vaseline!" u... In his eyes there are
tears.
President V. Putin contacted us, that's what
he said:
- I think that the taking of a pastor hostage is
a challenge to the entire society, the entire state, everything
to the worldin the end! The FSB also learned that
that these bo are Chechens / and they are exactly bo, and not 5o, as
was previously reported/, were trained in
Afghan camps under personal supervision
Osama Bin Laden. although how is Ben involved here?
Laden is unknown to us, because we sold it to him ourselves
Vaseline. We now know that terrorists are not
so simple, they are real professionals
your Vaseline business!
- Thank you Vladimir Putin. but this information
It’s best not to bring it to the attention of the pastor, he doesn’t care
not easy surrounded by 7o Chechens with tons
Vaseline. Yes, yes, precisely with 7o, and not with bo.
- Fools! The Chechens are probably now together with
they look and listen to us as a pastor!..
the doomed voice was heard from the pastor's apartment
sigh...
- And now we are stopping our broadcasting, time
later, it's time for us to get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow
latest news regarding the situation with
hostage. but it seems to us that the authorities will not agree
to make concessions to terrorists... ;)
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