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│ CONTINUOUS JOKS │
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(C) MASTER SOFT
QUESTIONS FOR ARMENIAN RADIO
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- What should a chamber pot be like in a small apartment?
- The same as usual, only with the handles inward.
* * *
- Can a German Shepherd become a Bulldog?
- Maybe if you chop off her tail and stuff her face.
* * *
- What is criticism from below?
- If you can't, get off.
Stupid sadistic advice:
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1. If you want to kill a person with cotton wool, then the cotton wool must be
return the brick.
2. To quickly cut hair, you must use a soldering iron.
mpoy.
3. In order to wash your car quickly and for free, you just need to
drive her into the river.
4. You have a dog and you don’t want to walk it, then throw it out
to the trash heap (Unless of course the dog is evil).
5. If a person has bleeding from the nose, then it is necessary to apply
a tourniquet around the neck.
6. If you need to protect a disk, then invite a couple
Riot policemen.
7. For a more efficient shave, use fire extinguisher foam.
la.
ABBREVIATION
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KGB- a bunch of state bandits.
GORBACHEV - Citizens Rejoiced Early - Brezhnev, Andropov, Che-
Rnenko Remember again.
JOKES
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- Yashenka, don’t swing on daddy! Don't swing on daddy, he won't
That's why I hanged myself.
* * *
The trial is underway. The judge asks the defendant:
- Why did you kill him?
- For a dream.
- Something is not clear, please explain.
- I didn’t kill him because he slept with my wife and mother-in-law, digu-
you understand the stator! And I didn’t kill him because he left me
down the drainpipe, stuntman, you know! And that’s why he killed him
he said: “I’ll be back!”, you understand the dreamer.
* * *
A commission from the Temperance Society enters the workshop. Suitable for
turner. He, not paying attention, continues to work.
“Look,” says the chairman of the commission, “how good it is.”
comrade is working. But if I drank a glass of wine, I wouldn’t be able to.
- Why? “I could,” the worker answers.
- Well, after a glass of vodka I couldn’t.
- I could.
- Well, what about after the bottle?
- You see, I’m working...
* * *
The noise coming from the next class prevents the teacher from teaching
lesson. He goes there, grabs the screamer by the ear and takes him into his
class. The neighborhood becomes quiet. After some time
there is a timid knock on the door. A student from the next class comes in andsays:
- Ivan Petrovich! Could you give us back our teacher-
calf?
* * *
Announcement on the river bank:
"Due to the absence of a bridge, travel on it is strictly prohibited! Fine -
100 thousand rubles!"
* * *
A stuttering doctor is seeing:
- B-b-sick, what are you complaining about?
- Doctor, I write exactly the same way as you talk.
* * *
The controller approaches the Chukchi on the bus:
- Your ticket?
- How smart, however! Buy yours and watch as much as you want!
* * *
- Well, how? Did you have problems with English in London?
- I have no. The British did.
* * *
Two Georgians play chess. One places his queen on the north
middle of the field:
- Checkmate!
The second places his king next to him:
- Father!
* * *
A man walks past a nine-story building. From above with a whistle
the piano falls. The man freezes in horror. Three centimeters from
the piano's head stops. A cheerful face will appear from it.
- Scared? Slap for fright! Vitya, wake up!
* * *
- Hello Abram! I decided to write you a letter...
..I wanted to send you a hundred dollars, but I sealed the envelope. Sorry
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(C) SPEED INFO
(R) RINDEXWell, here's a batch of new jokes for you. Read and have fun.
I looked out the window and saw that he was washing his shoes in a puddle. Well, I think
came to get married.
Always pesters me with French love. Me too, Gerard
Philip has been found...
According to the eastern horoscope, I myself am a Tiger, my alliance is with the Monkey
contraindicated. Plus fat and bald.
Well, that's all for now. Until the next issue.
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