FAK U on FidoRusty - jokes about Fido.

                                                              



      ФАК Ю по фидоРастии      



                                                              
                                                              
(I)IMPORTED ВУ HEAVEN AEROPLANE
                                                              
        Несколько слов от редакции.      
                                                              
    Этот  забавный текстик, выудил HEAVEN
AEROPLANE  где-то  в  бескрайних  анналах
фидошной канализации.                    
    К  сожалению данные автора установить
не удалось.  Hello, my friend, you are in one of
worldwide electronic networks.  The network is
society in society and this is a virtual community
society is not small at all, but large and
problems arising in communication also increased
ki.  The virtual method of communication has given rise to
many phenomena of patterned behavior in
this virtual society.  There is also
virtual sex and virtual flirting,
there is even virtual masturbation, though
virtual sex is real
masturbation  But perhaps the most common
A new phenomenon is fidorasty. Fidorastia
it is a collection of complexes, neuroses,
views and thoughts that rule the individual
house, after they take possession of it in that
or in some other way. Thus, it is possible to
let us conclude that fidorasty is a phenomenon
clinical and subject to treatment, or rather
repairing.  An individual who combines the above-
the listed negative characteristics
ki is called "fidoras" or "fedik".  Fe-
Dick is a mild form of the disease, and fido-
races is already a chronic course of the disease. 
  But fidorasty also has advantages,
for example, fidoras use fido pain
with great honor and try "and they have it you-
goes" to occupy key positions in
network structure. Fidoras always hold on
together, they don’t hurt each other and
always welcomehobehbkomy, because it’s so
It’s nice to let the whole camp down, man
something like 20 :)                            
   So, my friend, you have a choice before you,
to be or not to be a fidoras. If you choose
I wanted to be, then you will need this fact
compiled specifically for comprehension
basics and in-depth study of this premyd-
swarm of science - be a fidoras!  So,
listen:                                  
                                                              
   Distinctive features and components
fidorasa.                                
                                                              
Paragraph 1. This fidoras is distinguished by:
                                                              
Point 1.Huge conceit regardless
  from origin and motivation.    
                                                              
   As a result, the fingers are somewhere on 
  shoulder width in non-spread 
  state...                    
                                                              
Point 2.Inability or unwillingness to answer
  to a normally posed question,
  a replacing it with the word RTFM (READ
  TIZ MUZAFAKERS MANUAL).          
                                                              
Point 3.Complete misunderstanding of the essence of the problem
  or the issue under discussion, but
  no less comprehensive in its own way
  moronic answers and advice...    
                                                              
Clause 4.Snobbery in all its forms.      
                                                              
                                                              
           Paragraph 2. Fidoras:         
                                                              
Point 1.When there is nothing to *get*, get*-
  are traced to the source of origin
  explanation of this quote.               
                                                              
Clause 2.If the source of the quote is
  opponent, then everything is called his
  fabrications not worth a penny
  broken.                        
                                                              
  Paragraph 3. This fidoras must:  
                                                   
                                                              
Point 1.Quote only what is profitable.
  At the same time, shout loudly that it
  Quotas are set incorrectly. Clause 2.Answer a question with a question, and
  letting in more fog is not good
  bopkamu...                       
                                                              
Clause 3.At the first hint of agreement
  onnyheta, dance a jig on him
  grave, and conduct it further
  reduction to complete insignificance.      
                                                              
   Smart and intelligent people have this
behavior causes inhibitory communication
reaction, and the last word remains with
Fidoras. Remember the last word must
to be only YOURS and no one else's.        
                                                              
Clause 4.Clearly translate the topic of the dispute.  Yes
  opponentgets lost.              
                                                              
Clause 5.Do not speak under any circumstances
  anything specific.  It may
  be a reason that others
  fidoras will let you down. The less
  specifics, the greater the chances
  get away in case of a serious collision.
                                                              
Paragraph 4. A real fidor must not: 
                                                              
Point 1.Insert commas and switch
  keyboard layout. All agli-
 Yay words need to be written in
  Russian.  Always talk about technology
  logical problems in slang, a
 It's better to make up your own words.  
                                                              
Point 2.Be silent when talking o
  sex, immediately greet and modestly
  declare that you should fuck already
  it’s just unbearable, it doesn’t fit anymore,
  so fucked for your
  long life. Tell me what you're doing
  Do you prefer same-sex love?
  will definitely add cekcya-
  roundness and steepness in the eyes
  Don't forget to use
  jargon in conversation, this is also used
  steepness sign.  Give a gentle hint
  the interlocutor should drink alcohol
 prefer from the neck.  Who
  knows, maybe this will shock him
  in a good way...                
                                                              
          Paragraph 5. Fidorasy:          
                                                              
                                                              
Point 1.The main thing is never to ask yourself
  question, why do I need this?
  why do I need this coolness, why do I need
  this is self-affirmation, because I
  cool dude.  Fidoras is usually on
  this ends.                  
                                                              
   Begins to behave like this
in life, gets fucked and calms down
forever.                                
                                                              
Point 2. If you were specifically run over,
  or you want to look at someone
  specifically drive over, then the procedure
  should be of the following nature:
  - remind your opponent that he
  bespectacled, pimply youth, and you
  shvartsenegp;      -fuck you
  incorrect comma
  or typos, and dance on
  grave dance of the insulted in
  the best feelings of a connoisseur
  spelling, preferably in
  do not make serious letters
  errors...                        
                                                              
 Paragraph 6.             
      If you want to become a fidoras, then:   
                                                              
Point 1.Write all sentences with al-
  no letter - excuse, failure of both
  shift keys and caps.               
                                                              
Point 2.Avoid setting the letter H ir.  
                                                              
Point 3.Be sure to answer all
  letters from the moderator.     More often
  demand his re-election and
  changes in the rules.    YOU
  be known as cool and serious
  by a person.                       
                                                              
Point 4.Periodically write farewell messages
  letters (it is advisable to shit in them
  as many people as possible) after
  then disappear for two or three hours,
  and then write to all available
  echoes "I'm back, can you see me?"  
  More than two or three hours
  it is not recommended to disappear, you
  you will lose the authority of cool, o
  they will forget you, and everything will have to
  do it first.                  
                                                              
Point 5.Don't skip it under any circumstances
  not a single census, chain letters,
  votes. About you they canforget and
  you will lose your reputation as cool
  fidoshnik.                       
                                                              
Point 6. Get personal more often and 
  assign showdowns in real
  life.  Once in two or three letters
  it is recommended to regret that you are not
  you can meet in person and fill
  fuck your opponent.                  
                                                              
Point 7.Never meet anyone
  personally.   There's always an asshole
  who will write that he met you
  personally and saw the fear in your
  eyes.   This is scaryblow to
  to your prestige.                 
                                                              
                Paragraph 7.              
      You've almost become a fedik, no     
stop there, listen:
                                                              
Point 1.If you have a serious and cool
  a few oh, remember in a day
  only 24 hours, do not write
  at the same time that you are sleeping and
  see lucid dreams for 12 hours
  per day, surf the internet 8,
  administrate Unix and VMS
  10, still doing combat magic
  3 hours, 12 hours in a row playing
  kwaku, in the evening 4 hours in chain mail
  and with sharpenedusing a screwdriver
  all the punks in the neighborhood, overnight
  you have three friends who
  recorded within 3 hours
  evening walk, and in addition
  manage to upgrade weekly.
  computer and earn serious money
  money on cool programming
  or in serious business, and when
  all this actively write to 53
  Eh, and read and write some more
  one hundred and one......                
                                                              
Point 2.Do not buy the Internet. Internet
  for suckers. This is the fatal blow.
  And howthis phenomenon is called
  I don’t know on the internet...            
                                                              
Point 3.Specify as much as possible
  npocob in a condescending tone.
  Do not answer the questions yourself.
  Go straight to the approach...    
                                                              
Point 4.More leniency in
  tone. People love the greats.        
                                                              
Point 5.Feel free to use virtuality.
  No one will check you, that's all
  what you are missing in real
  life, you will find here.  Point 6.Lack of cool types and
  labels with pseudo-graphics of lines on
  7-8 makes you insignificant
  figure in fido...                
                                                              
Point 7.The main rule of how to look
  cool. NEVER READ THE RULES
  LA EH IN WHICH YOU WRITE...        
                                                              
                 Paragraph 8.             
 To be known as a successful fidoras: 
                                                              
Point 1.Behave unpredictably: if
  did anyone mention your favorite
  operating system, music style, toy
  or anything else, immediately
  get out and start pushing
  fingers, teach your interlocutor that
  what it does, it does
  wrong, check its taste, and
  better just subtly hint at
  the fact that it has no taste at all. 
                                                              
Point 2.Try to accompany your
  teachings of exquisite phraseological
 
  speech in archaisms, it will elevate you
  in the eyes of the public, they
  they think: “He’s really cool,
  look what words he knows!”       
                                                              
Point 3.Through every insult,
  New by you in response to your
  remind me of exquisite diarrhea
  to your interlocutor, to offend you
  impossible, you don't
  you are afraid and in general, there are chairs in you
  they rushed and nothing... And for this,
  that they believed you, bet more often
  winking emoticons nohabopo-
  better yet, they like it, believe me
  us!                             
                                                              
Point 4.An innocent joke is always splashed
  drool and shout loudly that
  joking idiot, this will add
  sexy and cool to you!    
                                                              
Point 5.When you get tired of jokes
  your sore subject, change
  tactics and write to your opponent
  in an insinuating voice
  nonsense, and then say that
  cover this topic, but nothing
  do not cover, continue
  spitting and sputtering, this is
  will strengthen the love of your neighbors for you.    
                                                              
Point 6.Spit more often, don’t let them npoco-
  xhytb.                           
                                                              
Point 7.Never forget that when
  ctpactue for writing sentences
  capital letters indicate
  successful, kyptoro fidopa.  
                                                              
                Paragraph 9.              
  To maintain the authority of the cool...:  
                                                              
Point 1.If you can install fry yourself
  - not used at all
  Windows, then you are cool! COOL!!! A
  so that others remember this
  you are rednecks and morons, o they are around
  you are all morons now, then no
  forget hanomhuhatb im o crooked
  wash their hands. They will listen to yours
  maxims with respect.           
                                                              
Point 2.Since now you are bright  
   honesty, cool programmer,
  please, linuxoid and other
  so on and so forth, then around you
  only one redneck left. And with the cattle
  there is only one method
  communication - let him know that it is y
  you in the tweetlist.                 
   Actually, this is the equivalent of the old
  "Fuck you didn't push me,
  asshole!"   but now this phrase
  sounds new and very
  aristocratic.                  
   This is for you, this is your tall and
  exquisite power of communication with
  plebeians.    Hold your head up, you
  deserve it!                  
                                                              
Point 3.If they tell you about something
  cool, which is quite sophisticated, then
  do not hesitate, casually but weightily
  declare that this is nonsense, but
  what you (saw, ate,
  used, did) - yes
  truly cool.                   
                                                              
Clause 4.If you told something or you
  struck your thought or just
  heard someone's IMHO and it's not for you
  If you like it, feel free to use it
  heavy weapon, it's called
  JUSTIFY!  like this, preferably with
  with an exclamation mark.  Hearing
  that it was called justification,
  the opponent usually gets lost and
  begins to justify that there is
  signal to trample.  Bravely and
  proudly dance the clang on it.  
                                                              
Point 5.Don't forget JUSTIFY - scary
  swear word if someone called you a name
  LET'S JUSTIFY, take revenge without knowing pity.
                                                              
Item6.If you want to make your opponent
  it’s disgusting, then put it on his house-
  External phone support, ensure
  have a fun night for him.