Ottyag - The main faults of women.

 (C) Han/Good Guys H. G.

 Main faults of women

 1) Malfunction: Refusal
army, shopping, cooking, food
requires regularly.

     Remedy: Check, not the man
is this?  If not, think about it
do you need such a woman? In extreme
if so, replace it.

     2) Malfunction: Does everything, but when
This lacks articulate speech.
Occasionally, hums and sighs can be heard.

     Elimination: Congratulations! You have enough
There was a promising development - a woman
future!

     3) Problem: Talks endlessly
by phone.

     Remedy: Inform that from the long-
talking on the phone around the mouth
wrinkles appear. In addition, the radiation
The telephone line is unfavorable
affects complexion.

     4) Malfunction: No display
facial expression and limb mobility.

     Remedy: Check if
she is sleeping.

     5) Malfunction: Constantly fix
creates scenes of jealousy.

     Remedy: Call her on the phone
and in a female voice say “confidentially”,
that everyone is crazy about her husband and loves her very much
see.

     6) Malfunction: The speech appeared
grumpy notes, otherwise everything is in order -
ke.

     Remedy: Give her a bouquet of flowers
Comrade, give the duty complement. In the region
Otherwise, give more moneyfrom
salaries.
     If it doesn’t help, wash the dishes (take them out)
those Christmas tree).

     7) Malfunction: Functions normally
ok, but something doesn’t suit you.

     Elimination: You are an asshole! I wouldn't be surprised
if you yourself are replaced by a more perfect one
model.

                  * * *

     The last elimination is too fem-
nistic, but ok. Now several
cyberpunk jokes and the promised
nasty thing about the first cyberpunk:


 (C) Fedorov "Chasm" Vladimir

 Reeves and Fishburne got drunk somehow,
and let's argue who is cooler in the eastern
martial arts. We went out into the street and jumped up.
up, hung, and both fell on their asses and
whether.
     - Yeah, you're not Nio. - said Fish
burn.
     - Yes, and you, not Morpheus.  - noticed
Reeves.

 * * *

 Once Maria Shriver went to the su-
permarket, and the keys to Schwartz’s car
I grabbed a couple. And he was impatient
go to the gym to pump yourself up. What de-
doesn’t know how to bark, then he figured: I’ll break it
side window with my fist, I'll open the door,
I’ll connect the wires, but I don’t mind the glass - nice-
Lionel after all. Suitable, then, for ma-
tire, slamming his fist on the glass, and it
didn't crash.
     - Yes, I’m not a Terminator, however. - by-
thought Schwartz.

 * * *

 I once bought a Harrison Ford rubber
Well, I fucked the woman a little and got down.
     - Not a fucking replicant - not enough brains -
vato. - Ford broke off firmly.

 * * *

 Once I came to Pierce Brosnan's gas-
but the mower, he took it to the computer
I dragged him and measured his IQ, and he was over 200.
     - Should I inject him with serum?
He's already smart. - Brosnan broke down.

  * * *

 Lambert was once played on a computer -
re, played, played, and NPCs behave
as it should.
     - Not that game. - Lambert thought.

 * * *

 Somehow Reeves decided to memorize the phone-
a reference book, steamed, steamed - no fucking way
it doesn't work.
     - Well, I don’t have any mikruh in my head. - with
Reeves sighed regretfully.

 * * *

     Here's a short anecdote:

 Gibson and Clark once got together
co-writing a novel...

 * * *

     And now!!! Promised riddle:

 Q: Who was the first cyberpunk?
 A: Carlson (remember the implanted
motor). (C) by Chasm

              * * *

     Well, after these anecdotes, it’s worth...
be tested correctly.