Miracle #02 10 августа 1997

Самиздат

Room with laughter - "No beer, life is beautiful" story Blade.

                  ... From the series .



 On a curve winding path
 through the woods and mountains straight
 the car drove freaks went live burial.

 Behind the wheel sat them armless,
 a legless pressed on the brakes.
 A blind man pointed the way,
 a fool bibikal without end.

 Suddenly from the woods rushed out a gang of truck had to stop.
 Deaf and dumb something barked,
 A one-armed shotgun raised.

 That shots were fired blindly at once five gangsters on the 
spot.  Half of the gang fled,

 but the legless immediately overtook them.

 One bandit did not notice the hide in the swamp he decided
 but the blind have long noticed him,
 well-armed with Colt packed ...



       "Without beer, life is beautiful"

      ----------------------------... Was a lovely summer day. 
Sun was shining brightly. Everywhere could be heard ringing 
chirping of sparrows, which are enjoying the sun with all his 
might fall into the puddles. BLADE woke up and grunted with 
displeasure, feeling as his eye penetrated bright

sunbeam. Thus opening both eyes stuck BLADE relish stretched 
zahrustev spine. Realizing that time pass in vain, he got up 
and went to washbasin. Having opened both faucets BLADE heard 
the sweet sound of water. Washed he pulled over his clothes and 
decided to go to the kitchen and find out what he now God has 
decided to send for breakfast. Seeing on his desk a couple or 
two buns and coffee with milk, BLADE smiled contentedly, and 
there also began to destroy all that stuff. Drank the first sip 
of your favorite coffee "Nescafe gold" BLADE I heard a joyful 
tinkling bell. "Who brought the fuck out there?" Bun-aside 
yelled BLADE without leaving the table.  From behind the door 
there was a choice mate ... BLADE went to the peephole and saw 
for themselves on the verge of ICE, who stood nervously

gnawed seeds. Steel door abruptly swung open (probably trying 
to hit ICE), ICE but bounced back smartly. Stuck his head out 
of the slot BLADE'a. -And it's you. How are you, nigga?

-Oh, yesterday smoked dope replied
ICE spitting kozhurkoy from seeds.
-Well, you come in - slyly smiling
answered BLADE.
ICE came in and told BLADE'u that
he called IRONMAN and invited me to
regular drunkenness. With these words, ICE
reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out
a wad of money. Then about 70 thousand rubles said ICE and look 
skunk looked at each other. Everyone understood BLADE stuck in 
themselves out of pocket jeans bundle of dollars and making 
sure that nobody touched it handed their ICE. Counted in the 
total total of about 150 thousand ICE satisfactorily put to 
paper in his pocket. After breakfast on the lungs, BLADE, ICE 
went to his longtime friend IRONMAN'u. By the way, they went to 
the store and bought two two-liter bottles of beer MONARCH 
(10.5%) and 4 bottles of vodka "Dougan. Pleased with purchase, 
my friends boarded a bus "18" route, and deftly

finished with the conductor went to the
IRONMAN'u ...
IRONMAN lived on the top floor of a sixteen-house. Seeing 
familiar faces IRONMAN happy, but even more it

was delighted when I saw that the package than
is filled. Joyfully greeted it
grabbed the bag with bottles and jumping
by his dog, he slowly walked
to your kitchen. The kitchen has
was covered with a huge table, which was bursting with all 
kinds of snacks. IRONMAN poured into shiny glasses sparkling 
liquid, which is remote looked like beer very high quality. 
-During a meeting! IRONMAN yelled and long ottrenirovannym 
movement overthrew his mouth glass with beer. BLADE ICE and 
followed his example. Just bringing mouth glass, ICE saw as 
IRONMAN was already hollowed and dried fish for edge of the 
table. Beer turned out to be extremely interest and ICE struck 
since the sixth glass. In his head struck a pleasant feeling, 
and life began to take its natural color. Rolling his eyes 
BLADE poured herself another cup of divine fluid. IRONMAN 
opened a bottle vodyary and it filled all the circles. 
Vypili.Zakusili. It took about 20 minutes. Bytylok vodka

Beer is gone. IRONMAN opened the last bottle and spill, and 
climbed to the recorder. A couple of minutes from the bowels of 
the columns I heard the first sounds. ICE jumped

together with a glass of vodka and shouting, "Yes
it's the same HARDCORE, his mother has closed her eyes
and began to lurch drunkenly to the music. IRONMAN another cup 
upset vodka and eating a lemon babbled "We need to

to smoke, however. "However, ICE did not hear him, he began to 
hammer away to neighbors, occasionally sipping from a glass of 
vodka. IRONMAN stood up, walked to the tape recorder and turned 
off hardkorovskuyu melody. ICE ominously looked at IRON'a. "We 
need to have a smoke," "a louder voice said IRONMAN. Exactly! - 
Picked up the idea of ​​ICE and pulled from his shirt pocket a 
pack of brand new "L'M". Each took on a cigar, and all together 
went to the balcony, Ksor brains. Releasing ring

smoke, BLADE looked down and saw that
all people in a strange lurch.
In BLADE'a dizzy and he knew
that is a sign of alcohol sat on the couch, and
lazily drank the rest in a glass of beer.
Protracted BLADE started thinking about the meaning of
life. Life seemed hell
fun thing. Pleased with his progress
thoughts BLADE, reached for a circle of smoked sausages. At 
this time, from the balcony IRON appeared and ICE and decided 
to go poyuzyut IRON'ovky SPECCY. BLADE immediately to keep them 
company. After viewing a pair of demonstrations turned out that 
the ICE room no longer exists. IRON indifferent vzglya

House looked around the room, he saw sitting on the
sofa point, and looked more learned in her
BLADE'a. Zaksoreny brain IRON'a wanted
pointerisovalsya far gone ICE. Realizing
that BLADE is not able to do
reply, IRON tried to get up. He is
managed with great difficulty. He retired from
room with cries of "Itza, where are you your mother"
Here IRON'u heard the sound of something breaking. He looked 
into the room and was horrified to found that the ICE runs 
there and scatters light bulbs all over the floor. IRON 
staggering Sine, ran over to ICE and carefully took from his 
hand miraculously survived three light bulbs. Putting them in 
their rightful place IRONMAN calmed down and walked away. But 
going back, he heard the sound shuts dveri.Rezko turning 180 
degree, he miraculously survived on his feet, grabbed one of 
the adjacent cabinets and went to look for ICE. Running past 
the bathroom, he discovered that the door there closed.

"Strange," thought-IRON continuing his
Marathon in the apartment. A few
circles pierced his terrible suspicion and
He walked rapidly to the bath.
It is. ICE was locked in the bathroom. Looking into the slot 
door, IRONMAN saw that ICE sleeping on the floor. 
"Open!"-Yelled IRONMAN. -The very open - there was in a drunken 
indifferent response ICE'DI GRIZ'a. IRON'a this sentence 
infuriated. He began more batter in the door. Crumbled plaster. 
And then it dawned on IRONMAN'a. He opened his mouth and that 
there are forces shouted "BLADE Come here quickly! ". BLADE 
awoke when he heard a familiar name, and began to remember Who 
of your friends wear it. After a couple of tens of seconds, he 
realized it was him and have the same BLADE. Jumping up, he ran 
for help is implored by cries coming from the dark corners of 
the corridor. IRON asked BLADE'a needle. BLADE pulled from 
pocket huge needle (on it and BLADE, to carry all sorts of 
sharp things like knives and straight razors) and handed it to 
IRONMAN'u. He fell to the ground and began to poke a needle 
into ICE. At that ICE responded by quietly climbed into the 
tub. IRON doomed zaoroal voice not his own.

Then he got up and went to the kitchen. BLADE
picked up a needle and stuck it in his pocket.
Entering the room he saw the remains of IRON finishing his 
vodka and beer, lit a cigarette and lay down on the couch kuriv 
it. BLADE bummed y IRON'a cigarette, and sat in the adjacent

seat firmly tightened.
BLADE opened his eyes. Could not understand it
looked at their quartz watches and found that he had slept for 
about two hours. My head began to clear. Hardly stood up, and 
shaken so that nearly fell, BLADE went from room to room search

IRONMAN'a. He saw it lying around
bath. IRON! - BLADE stammered and tried to lift IRONMAN'a from 
the floor. IRON here jumped up and drunkenly opened her eyes 
said some phrase like "I will go to the balcony,

and wash what-if ". BLADE pohrapyvaniya heard emanating from 
the bath, and I realized that ICE does not get out there. 
"Okay, I will go home, "said the BLADE himself and began to

wear sneakers familiar. "C YA! .." IRON yelled from somewhere 
in the balcony. "BYE!" Said BLADE closing the door. Coming in 
the middle of the road BLADE raised his hand and there also 
stopped by some sort of machine. BLADE began to peer into the 
shape of the car and Then he was horrified to find that this is 
a police jeep. "That shit!" Whispered BLADE and ran off into 
the yards. Convinced that no one pursues, he walked

three houses and went out again on the road.
At this time, stopped some kind
man on the Volga.
Debe-Hood, Baren? Asked explicitly suffering grip the driver.
-Komsomolky Ave. House of 112. Apartment 28 - blurted out at 
once BLADE. Then I realized that said something superfluous 
BLADE modestly smiled, dazzling white teeth driver

-Create one! - Said the driver flinging the car door.
A few minutes later was on the BLADE
the threshold of his apartment. Slightly pozvenev
keys, he finally opened the door and burst inside, closing his 
eyes on a drunken intoxication.

Was a wonderful day ... - Thought BLADE falling sedated. And 
outside were heard excerpts of someone's conversation and joyful

whistling of birds.