Nicron #66 11 декабря 1997

Юмор

Humor - anecdotes.

(R) DeL

              ° ° ° ° °

Anecdote to a connoisseur:

Desert. Sand dunes. Running lizards. It is worth yurt. Middle
yurts - an aquarium. It floats Ichthyander. In a yurt comes a 
woman paranzhe in and says:

    - Ichthyander-aka, bishbarmak kyushat we?
    - You fool, I want to fish, I - Ichthyander!

              ° ° ° ° °

    Travel Comrade Sukhov and Sayid in the desert.
    - And give me a cigarette, Said ...
    - So Nat sygaret, tovarysh Sukhov!
    - As there is, in fact only this morning a pack of "Camel" 
was taken!     - Shoot ...


              ° ° ° ° °

Caught the guy, as usual golden fish, she told him barter
propose, on the principle of let - desire. A man thinks and
says:
- I want this river right now all the traffic police in coffins 
floated! - Man, you're that, among the cops and good people 
there? - Yes ...? - Thoughtful man, - Well, let good traffic 
police in good coffins float!


              ° ° ° ° °

    There are two old friend the fisherman.
    -Hello! One hundred years have not seen you. How's life?
    Yes, so-so. Here is married ...
    -I guess beauty from?
    -Do not ask. Terrible does not happen.
    -Maybe a rare spiritual beauty?
    -Where there ...
    -Probably a good hostess?
    -If ...
    -Maybe in bed ...?
    -Remember, the hair vsayut ...
    "Listen, why did you take? Throw it all.
    -I can not.
    -?
    -It is rare worms. They chebak good bite.

              ° ° ° ° °

Caught in the Chukchi tundra camel (a camel as he got there - it
it can walk), and brought him to his tent. And here is what to 
feed does not know him, if so leave - could die. Went to the 
Chukchi Shaman ask about diet unseen beast. Shaman - Give him

meat, if eaten - it means wolf. Chukchi next day
prihoditOdnako, do not eat meat. Shaman - Then give him a 
lichen. Chukchi comes again - however, and the moss does not 
eat. Shaman leaned to the Chukchi tent, he saw a camel and says 
- Balda, the same Kamel - his Smoking should be.


              ° ° ° ° °

Sit as a cowboy in his favorite saloon, drinking whiskey. 
Suddenly runs into the saloon wounded cowboy:

- Save yourself - said he died.
Nobody paid attention to the poor man, sipping his swill.
Runs into the saloon the other wounded cowboy:
- Save yourself, Bill White is - also legs stretched out.
Again, no attention to it does not pay.
A third wounded cowboy walked into the saloon and fell on the 
threshold: - Save yourself, Bill White goes all kill and rob!

Just like the cowboys get up, they saw on the threshold is
tall cowboy dressed in white and in his hand on the Colt:
- Cash down, hands behind gololvu - he tells them.
Do nothing - the money laid out. Cowboy in white collected all
bag and says:
- And now saved, is Bill White.

              ° ° ° ° °

Stranger man in the Wild West came into the saloon, ordered a
whiskey and soda, sit drinking. He hears on the street shouting,
shots. Asks the cowboy at the next table:
- What is it there?
- That Elusive Joe indulges - lazily replied.
- Why is it elusive? Gather together and catch.
- But who is he nafig need?