Nicron #46 07 августа 1997

Юмор

Humor - anecdotes.

(R) DEL

 Comes a general in part, comes into the barracks - on a bed in
 Boots is demobilization and henerala - 0 of attention. General:
 Who are you? Demobilization (and lazily yawning): I 
e-ee-Mbela. General:  And I - General! Demobilization: Same as 
non-$ uevo ... 


 A search for man - dug moonshine. Tuck in!
 said district. Chudnenko! SchA We'll get you for
 moonshine, and that ... -So I'll not drive! But same-appart
 there? Then try and rape! -What are you,
 someone was raped?? -No! But the apparatus is there?


 Chatted companions, Russian French and American.
 Brought it about gummannoe to animals. Am. -We
 bulls are killed instantly, shock. They did not even upevayut
 get wind of Fr. -And we have them first and then euthanized 
under general  anesthesia ... Roux. -Hmm. I do not know 
exactly, but on the counter forever  some bone fragments ... 
Blown up, probably! 


 Crest being chased around the yard for the piglets. With a 
pitchfork. And no  slaughter can not. A neighbor saw. Dai 
thinks will help. Yeah,  helped. Two zhokana in ruzhzho with 
two trunks on! A crest  stood on the forks looks and 
cries-Zhinkov! -Ga ... Shaw "ha"  plague! You dyvis, forks yak 
gun strelyayut! -Really? Vaught  those, well! Farrowing pure 
ripped to shreds ... 


 Tumble into the saloon, and then falls wounded cowboy,
 hoarse voice, barely pronouncing: - Save yourself, Joe White
 goes ... Only he said, runs a cowboy, shoots
 Ceiling: - I'm White, Joe! Money, jewelry on the table! All
 start to fuss. He takes it all and before leaving: - A
 now unwound, Joe White is ...


 Thief comes into the apartment - rob. Gathered in one room
 everything of value in another part of the third, and there 
sits an enormous  dog and growls. Muzhit quietly, staring 
backwards starting from  room, when suddenly a voice says: 
"What has come to plunder?  The thief looks back and sees: 
sidin parrot on the table. Muzhik  quietly as a parrot - Hush, 
hush ... A parrot again - What  rob come from? - Yes quieter 
you are, what other words do you know?  - I know - FAS!



 After a stormy night my husband woke up and saw how his wife 
looks  The husband in the mirror "You Th smotrishsya in the 
mirror?" Wife, "Why,  watch the child from us, or gases? ". The 
next morning  repeated the same thing. On the third morning his 
wife wakes up and  sees her husband in the mirror. Wife, 
"You're Th in the mirror looking at?"  Husband, "Why, look at 
me a member or a gas Balon" 


 Rides the bus. Driver - drug. Takes matyugalnik and
 announces: - Kotsan coupons because coupons kotsanye
 Gil for the excuse, not kotsanye Gil for a rotten market.


 At the doctor's. - Doctor, when I drink tea, I
 right eye helluva lot of pain. : (- Grandma, and you spoon
 glass pull.



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