Nicron #13 31 декабря 1996

Humor - anecdotes.

1. Reverend O `Millie walks in the park and sees
touching scene: a very pretty girl, blond and
curly-haired, wearing a dress with frills playing with a 
charming dog. - What is your name, my child? - Rosochka ... - 
Beautiful, beautiful name. And why her parents named you that? 
- When Mom carried me in the tummy, she rested at the cottage. 
Once she was asleep around rose bushes and a rosette fell on 
her tummy. Parents thought it was a sign from God, and agreed 
that if They will be born a girl, they call it rose. - What is 
poetry! thought the priest. - And your name is ka prelestnuyub 
dog? - Hog ... - A strange nickname for a dog, a girl. It 
probably named as your parents, because it is strong and 
powerful? - Oh no, I call it so ... He fucks pigs. Here's why.


2. Family at the zoo. Came to the donkey, and he just dumped
their wealth. - Pope, - he asked my son - that it had? - Yes
so ... "that the devils." Son of the mother: - Mom, look what a 
donkey "Devils that! - Oh! This is my son, not the devil that - 
corrects mother, is "what is necessary".


3.Papa, behold, two flies walking! One - a woman, and another -
man. - How do you distinguish them? -Very simple. See: 0N
siditna neck of the bottle of wine, but it is already an hour 
creeps on mirror ...


4. - Dad, where are slonyata? - You see, Vovochka ... -
0-that's just not necessary again about the stork. Stork such a 
"fool" is not raise the ...


5. Pope leaves for trip to Leningrad, and says: - Children
if you want, what I brought you a gift - then ask me
about this verse ... Masha: - The Pope travels to Leningrad, Dad
buy chocolate - well, Masha, buy you chocolate. Pete: -
Pope travels to Leningrad, Dad would buy marmalade - Well, 
Peter, buy you a jelly ... Vova, but you what? - The Pope 
travels to Leningrad .. dad will buy me a moped. - Em, Vova, it 
is not in rifmu.Poprobuy still a time. - The Pope travels to 
Leningrad Mother's fancy man will be happy to Eyny fancy man - 
our neighbor Daddy buy me a moped ... 

6. The policeman is in office and swears obscenities at 
selective standing beside the boy. - Are not you ashamed to 
swear on child?? - Outraged passersby. - And you were in my 
place is not swearing to? He already runs two weeks behind me 
and asks to sleep with his bitch. You see him desperately need 
a police dog! 

7. The teacher gives students a task: - Create a proposal with 
the the word "pineapple." Masha: - Yesterday, my mother and I 
bought a delicious pineapple. - Good for you. Vovochka: - And 
our dad left her for another woman ... - Vovochka, but where's 
the "pineapple"? - "And for us," with Mom put the horseradish.


8. a chemistry lesson, a student mistook reagents and was not 
the solution. Maknul finger - and he no longer bend. Brought 
home, told his father. That gave him a gold piece and took the 
solution. Boy put the bill under the pillow. Morning waking, 
and under the pillow thirty rubles. - This is for you from my 
mother - said my father. 

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