Micro #10 28 ноября 1998

Юмор

Humor - a compilation of anecdotes.

               JOKES



"You asked my father permission to
marriage?
Yes. I called him on the phone, he replied: "I do not know who 
is speaking, but I do not mind.



                *

There are two newcomers. One asks
other:

-Is it true that in this town theater is not popular?
-Not a word, "replies the second.
Yesterday, the question of when the play, I answered:
-When you will be comfortable ...


                *

Talk to two people:

-For a month no longer see the yacht of your uncle. What 
happened to her? "You notice the big rock in our bay?

Yes.
-But my uncle did not notice her ...


                *

On the court:
-So when it came to the collision,
your opponent in the hands of a stick ... A
what was in your hands?
-His wife.


                *

After the test the teacher says
Basil:

-Admit that you are all forgiven, Masha!
-How do you know?
-Answering the latter question, she wrote:
"Do not know" ...
You wrote: "Me too!"


                *

-Captain, we're going to drown!
The distance to the nearest land?
-10 Miles!
-In what direction?
-In the vertical!


                *

After a long trip my husband comes home.
The wife says to him:

-Nice! You even kissed!
"But, dear," he answered - after six
years of marriage - and such an orgy!


                *

Today, we finally stopping here alone, - says
Male Female .- I bought three tickets to the movies.
"Why three tickets to the movies.
"Why three? ..
-Thy: mother, father and brother!


                *

The woman, returning from leave, complaining
friend:

All-time pouring rain ...
-And yet you're tanned!
-It is not tan, it's - rust!


                *

Talk to two friends:

-Do you leave after so rounded person. You are so well fed?
No, twice a day I had to inflate a rubber mattress ..


                *

In the mountain resort patient complains of a doctor
that it is hard to breathe.
-How? - Surprised the doctor.
-In this clear air?
-Exactly! At home I used to see
than breathing.


                *

The guide at the museum tells visitors:

-Look at this statue. How gracefully pulled her arm. This is 
how it seems to say: "Do not forget to give a tip tour guide." 
__________________________________________ 


  07.10.98 Shaman.