Wallpaper #01 31 марта 1998

Joke - A single standard for soviet sysop.

              4. FUN



   And here is pretty old, but very
funny text. Those who have not yet
reading, especially the fans modem connection, he
hope will bring a couple of pleasant moments.



          Description ESNNS

          -------------

  (Unified standards on soviet sysop)



1. General Provisions

1.1 This standard is designed to
Recognition of the total mass of specific
individuals who have received the scientific name
Sysops [SysOp - an exact translation of this
word is unknown to us, but, shall we, that
this is a medical term].

1.2 Persons who meet this
official document prepared
life, the title or sysop Psisop [see
below].



2. Characterization

2.1 General condition

- Unshaven (continuing in the same degree)
- Beer (substitute - lemonade)
- Mayonnaise (in store)
- Cats (under the bed)
- Non-standard understanding of the word "It"

- First thought when a friend request to record
him to tape something from the world
classical music - "Damn, it is still
hour format :-(".

- Reaction to the word TOWER - , <Enter>.
Option for GoldED -  <R>  <M>.

 - Has an unhealthy reaction to the word
"General" - are absent any notion
about time, chicle, day of the week mecyatse ...


2.2 Must

- Snap with the codeword "ATS"
- Awake to hear the subway phrase

  "Hendsheyk faylyure"
- Nostalgically to perceive the word Bow
  Hill - wide open eyes at the sight of

  string CONNECT 17689/VOICE
- Talk at the same time in a tube "ATDP03 |"
- Understand that DZ - this is not the initials, and

  diagnosis; that KGB is alive and well and always with

  us!
- Be able to squeak at least for 1200
- Do not confuse the whistle with an answer

  V23


2.3 Specific actions

- Before opening the door double-clicks

  <ESC>
- Any kind of flame tries to immediately

   extinguish
- Tells his wife when she goes

   sleep: "Here is one more little note to
   I read, and come ... "
- Inscription on the stalls reads: "Ludmila -

   Your RELIABLE COMPRESSED Partner
- Sometimes goes to a military department study
   chat rockets


2.4 Special features

- Inexplicably wants to eat in polchet
  helicopters in the morning. As in everything else

  time. :)
- Red eyes (the sysop:)
- Swollen fingers (moved down the roof prische
  sweet ...)
- A permanent desire spaaaa-ah-ah-ah-at ...

  State is almost stable because sleeping

  snatches and line of sight

  from komputera. Wakes up every

  half hour and anxiously looking at the screen

  - Do not buggy ....
- Sharply raised, heard impassioned

  hiss carrier'a
- Graduated from the institute, forgets to take deep
  scrap.


2.5 Dreams

- Modem to 115200 and communication with all

  clock, and without a single error
- To get naked Santa coat with a firm Mules

  payment by fax

2.6 Unconditional reflexes

- When he hears a joke type ':)'
- After a telephone conversation
all the time trying to press Alt + Q, Alt + X or
Esc, depending on the picture on the screen
blizhlezhaschego computer

- The recruitment of long-distance telephone
numbers after the number 8 seconds waiting
saying in my head Wwwwwww ....; if
busy, then considers four BUSY and only after
This presses the reset


2.7 innermost desires

- In the morning: sleep
- Evening: a cup of coffee
- Continuously: USR HST 14400e, cigarette
a lot of floppy disks, hyphae, sleep, 486 - rare:
cory, format, ie, to explain something
- Never: wash, shave, get married


3. Classification SysOr s

Sysop with strong psychic
potential called Psisop. Main
differences from normal (meaning
sysop:): willpower catches busy and
loses carrier (do not hold everything at once
obtained), the modem is very responsive to him and
developed a conditioned reflex: the phrase
"Connects, bitch !!!!" responsible CONNECT
2400, and the phrase "right now ... [let it be
hrenaknetsya] "- NO CARRIER.

Represents one of the varieties
Zombie - once chief says
viper's voice code phrase "Here the bill for
Intercity came ...", or deletes itself
falls into a rage (just possible
version of the "tower"). May also cheerfully
to answer (depending on the interests
Head):

1) Fresh AIDSTEST the source
2) BC + + 3.0
3) Ehi commercial and added: "directly
shaking, here! ".


Notes:
---------
This document is an official and
binding ispolneniya throughout
Scoop area [options: CIS CCCR].

  For the development of this document was
A special department for Development
Uniform Standards for shovels sisopov in
composition: Gleb Mitin, Mikel Lavrentyev,
Igor Grischenko, Vadim Gerasimov, Harry
Nikolayev, Fyodor Ustinov, Gosha
Zafievsky, Roman Trunov, Sasha
Vishnevetsky, Oleg Mazurow, Nicolas
Rodionov, Asy Patrysheva, Andrey
Filimonov, Igor Kaminskiy.