Maximum #17 22 сентября 1996

Юмор

solid jokes - Collected sayings of Soviet officers (continued).
Advertising - Advertisements and announcements ...

            SOLID FUN


 (C) IRONMAN


         COLLECTION OF STATEMENTS OF SOVIET OFFICERS

         Textbook for junior and middle
            academic staff.


                 "The citizen does not need fools.
                           So here I am. "
                      Unknown ensign.


270. You too are feeling.

271. Who's walking around with a red nose like a cucumber?

272. Oh my, these Americans - all sorts there Reagans, Margaret 
Thatcher ... 

273. In the area subject to the action of chemical weapons, the 
platoon 

     conducting an operation to intercourse wooden houses.

274. That I have made you not in the other direction.

275. The Earth rotates on its axis - this allows us to measure
     ryat time.

276. - Comrade Colonel, you have a big salary?

     - Well, I do not know ...

     - Well, an order of magnitude greater than my scholarship?

     - The order is unlikely, but once in fifteen - that's for 
sure. 

277. We will punish, in spite of who you are - the captain or

     officer.

278. Classes you have carried out sporadic, epidemiologically.

279. The measures taken were crowned with success.

280. And you and your ear does not blink ...

281. Get drunk and crawl around on all fours!

282. Think about your future!

283. Around the garbage! Vaughn is a whole bin of papers, and 
on them no 

     decide!

284. Pampering with a weapon, comrade soldiers, yet nowhere

     resulted.

285. For their diligent work commander awarded you.

286. Once again you do not shave? But it begins with the 
Motherland. 

287. Top of infamy ...

288. Pandemonium of the world ...

289. Why yesterday were again under the degrees and go on 
exhilarating      marketable?




                ADVERTISING.


 (C) CDS SOFT


   Call, call, and once again call (someone already mentioned).



      Sale 13th drive in working condition. Cheap!

  Tel. 554-1582 Alexei call from 14:00 to 22:00 daily.


 Interested in any information on the radio, as well as the 
interests shoved a good program for AY-mouse.  Tel. Alexander 
902-0113, call between 17:00 and 20:00, with MF 



     Interested in all information on the printer ROBOTRON 6312.

  Tel. 344-7762 Michael, to call from 20: O0 to 22:00 daily.



      Seeking for an exchange program for a computer ATM-Turbo 
2 +. 

  Tel. 344-7762 Michael, to call from 20:00 to 22:00 daily.


           I have two 13-s drive for three rubles
 Tel. Alexander 409-9029, call between 13:00 and 21:00 daily.


     For sale-6312 printer (radium), drive-13 and

      Head of TEAC'a. All working. Tel.499-3117 Ilya.


 Sale prefix "Kanga" 8-bit + full set of wires +

     4 cartridges with a bunch of games: DIZZY: Fantastic 
adventure, 

    BIGNOISE FREAKS OUT, PRINCE OF PERSIA and many others.
          Price 200 TR Bargain.

  Tel. 168-5705 Dimitri call from 19:00 to 23:00 daily.


        Dear Sirs users!

   There is a desire to connect two computers in a small 
network. 

  In order to make them understand each other and could

    would play together in one toy on two computers.

  Who can help, a big request to respond. Desirable
 availability of the scheme. The presence of the scheme is not 
just desirable, but necessarily     not necessarily! Concerned 
only with business proposals!          All the people who voice 
to us, thank you very much! 

    Tel: 903-0347 (Sergei), from 18.00 to 21.30 daily.


           Buy AY-MOUSE to the wiring.
 Tel. 395-8162 Alexander, calls from 12:00 to 22:00 daily



   I sell and collect custom phones AONom! RUSS-22C + "

  At preobretenny my phone given 2 YEAR WARRANTY!

  The cost of the phone AONom - 225 TR The term of the assembly 
3-7 days 

              And also carry out:

    - Repair any type AONov
    - Replacement of the software versions on the latest
    - Memory expansion up to 256 rooms
    - Installation of voice boards for 1 min. and 4 min.
    - Installation SPEAKERPHONa

           QUALITY GUARANTEED!


    Phone: 496-61-59 Igor from 12:00 to 23:00.


 Change COMMADORE-64 + drive on any 128k + spektrum drive.
       Tel. 554-1582, from 14:00 to 22:00 daily.


Sale SCORPION-256K + monitor 32 WTC 202 + MS5350 + drive wheels.
          Price 900 TR (Bargain).
    Tel. 256-3370 Andrew from 19:00 to 22:00, Monday to Friday


               SELL!


        --- PENTAGON - 128K (see below)
        --- B / C MONITIR B / P Rodney (see below)
        --- Two drives "TEAC" 1.2M
        --- CDOS-MODEM
        --- AY-MOUSE
        --- AY-8910
        --- Kempston Joystick (see below)
        --- Two speakers (stereo)
        --- PRINTER ML-6312 (see below)
        --- LOT DRIVES
        --- LITERATURE
        --- TWO SPECTRUMA - 48K (see below)
        --- Two supervisors DRIVE (see below)
        --- "Mother" 286 (see below)

                + * +

            * FOR PENTAGON - 128K *

               For him to set:

    1. Additional memory 565RU5 - 16sht.
    2. Replacement stickers on the keys (iron, pile)
    3. For the case insert the keyboard - 2 pcs.
    4. Spare KR1818VG93 - 1pc.
    5. Different schemes


             * MONITOR NOT WORKING *

               For him to set:

    1. Reserve Corps
    2. Pipe dead
    3. Board dead


             Kempston * NAVIGATION *


  Made of the joystick from DENDY (though it is a bit 
incomplete) 


              * PRINTER MS 6312 *

        In working condition, but without the loop
             (From the board to 'head')

               For him to set:

    1. Controller board dead
    2. Stack of papers


             Also available:

    SPECTRUM'y 48K in an unknown state
    Disk controllers in an unknown state
    "Mother" 286 for free if needed

                 + * +

            Price: negotiable

    Call: 387-07-63 Dmitri, in the evening



  Sale color monitor electronics 32 WTC 202, for 300 TR
           Tel. 903-0347, Alexander.


        C R O W N O buy a printer MS6313 (6312).
 Tel. 554-1582 (Alex), call from 14:00 to 22:00 daily.


        C R O W N O buy a customized fee 128K

      (Better than the Pentagon, you can even without the CPU 
and ROM)  Tel. 902-0113, Alexander, to call from 17:00 to 
20:00, Mon .- Fri 



GENTLEMEN ADVERTISERS, TIMELY WAIVES ITS ADVERTISING WHEN
           You are in it no longer needs.



                 EPILOGUE


 (C) RINDEX


   No, I'm over this jar will sit still long. In general, seem
like everyone else. I only need to drink liters of beer, and 
say goodbye to You. Bye, see you.




Editor in Chief - Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627
Deputy Editor in Chief
              - Alexander Eliseev / CDS SOFT / ... 395-8162
Partition Editor "Advertising", "List of BBS" and "Wanted"
              - Alexander Eliseev / CDS SOFT / ... 395-8162
Editor, "News from DITRONIK 3 BBS"
               - Little Russians Ilya / CYBORG / ... 409-4297
Editor-in "party!"
            - Dmitry Sosenushkin / RAVER / ... 168-5705
Editor of the "Printed with the continuation"
             - Pavel Fedin / API SOFTWARE ... 329-4385
Editors section Razbiralka "
              - Alexander Eliseev / CDS SOFT / ... 395-8162
               - Malyshev, Alexander / WARRIOR / ... 902-0113
               - Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627
Editors of the section "Continuous Fun"
             - Skobtsov Alex / MASTER SOFT / ... 218-1448
             - Alexander Titov / IRONMAN / ... 455-9089
               - Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627
Editor of the remaining sections
               - Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627

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     Or call the editor at:
 422-8627 from 13.00 to 21.00 (Denis), except Saturdays and 
Sundays, 

       or call an alternate phone:
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 To advertise in the newspaper, "MAXIMUM" call:
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 All changes in the servers, and for registering new
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          The newspaper is published from 9/6/1996.