City #31 01 октября 1999

Юмор

Smiley - debility jokes.

   ************** **************** Smiley



  Father reads his son the night tale:
- And here comes from the forest goblin ...
- Who the hell?
- Sleep, damn it!


  Vodka "Pinocchio." Feel like firewood.


  Advertisement:
"I am looking for a guinea pig." Experienced rabbit.


  Grandma says Grandpa:
- It seems we will have kids.
- Well, tomorrow, after the pension ...


  Stands a man with a hangover in the mirror and sees himself. 
Then he says: - All people as human beings. And I - as handsome 
as a god! 


  Two grandmothers watched the film "Star Wars", and
an interest in the other:
- And who are the "Jedi"?
- Oh, it's a cross between a Georgian with a Jew.


  Russian and the Englishman argue over whether someone
language better. Russian:
- What do you have the curve of the language, even to conjugate 
verbs do not know how. We take to be: I'm, he is, we are -

solid mess.
Englishman:
- Sir, but because of your language is the same problem. Take 
the verb "go": I pofigachil you rowing away, We keel, they 
priperlis ... 


  Near future. In the den of drug addicts zhenschinainformator 
announced over loudspeakers: - Dear drug, as well as the 
mourners, I repeat, that glitch "Bavarian Express" comes only 
from the second track! "



  There are two friends, a computer technician.
- Are you connected to the Internet?
- How did you guess?
- In your eyes.
- What, are smarter?
- No, the red ...


  Lieutenant Rzhevskii goes after the ball onto the porch and
yelling:
- The driver!
Cabbie responds:
- Aegeus!
- At Muznetsky Coast!
- At Vuznetsky post? Crusts sopeek!
- Crusts sopeek? Yes I am for crusts sopeek on zholoy gope
doedu!


  Attention! On the roads, a new kind of perverts - 
GIBDDtsionisty! 


  Sobering-up call:
- To you Sidorchuk today did not bring?
- No.
- And do not bring. I'm at home today Buch!