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Missed again :) | ** ** | FOX/AIS
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Dedicated to everyone who wants to know a little about construction
more...
Hi, all... Just like always in the summer, I got drunk on diphenhydramine and was high
I decided to enlighten you on something:
Construction, through the eyes of Hacker.
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Instead of an epigraph:
Our work is a great romance,
What's better in the worldis there, tell me?
We rise higher to the sun,
High-rise buildings, floors...
(Inscription in one of my khabzai’s offices)
Mmm... So, construction. Suks. This has long been clear to everyone. But there is also a lot
various subtleties, patterns, and even jokes (with fatal
outcome...)
For example, as a student, I will bring you some things.
Law of the first working day at a new facility:
-We don’t work all day.
Law of the Second Working Day at a New Site:
- We don’t work until lunch, we rest after lunch.
The law of all working days at any facility:
-I want, I don’t work, I want to rest, but I want as I want...
So, now the most important axiom of construction:^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
-When there is money in the office, we build, when there is no money,
yhocum, let's drive.
Thus, construction is nothing more than a balance between
“there is money” and “there is no money.” There are no exceptions.
Example: the third day there is no money - they brought in 5 barrels of putty.
The foreman had arrived, everyone thought, Khan. No. I asked who was driven
I asked if they needed more cement and paint.
They said it was necessary. The next day I brought 5 barrels of paint, 5 bags
cement. After lunch there was one barrel of paint left (empty).
There is no cement left anymore.
A separate speech about drunkenness at a construction site. In general, all the problems
students with foremen/foremen are resolved through the store.
hence the first three missions of a novice builder:
1. mix a bucket of solution.
2. run from the store.
Z. figure out where to goproduct mission 1
The first mission must ALWAYS be completed. There are also exceptions
no. Even if no one is going to work anymore, the student’s task is
MIX THE SOLUTION. So that everyone can see that the team is ready to work.
Mixed the tub and walk. Well, you can still have 20 buckets of sand for the 10th floor
bring it in, because the lift will be launched into scrap. Yes and why
Wasting electricity in vain?
The second mission is very simple. Doesn't really need any comments.
The main thing here is not to confuse vodka with Pepsi-Cola.
The third mission is the most fun, and follows from the first (so
They mixed the mortar and ran to the store, but while the builders were drinking,
the solution has set - it's an infection, and the order from the authorities is to work it out
hurry up. How and where - you decide for yourself)
So, if the solution has not yet completely set, you can
try to find/gouge a hole in the wall (bigger) and cover it up
solution. To demonstrate to everyone how to work.
If the option is not suitable (the solution has dried up + the walls are concrete)
you can hollow it out of the box and leave it piece by pieceto the basement.
Possibly under the stairs. You can go into the attic too. The most fun
option is to stuff it into the pockets of students from another brigade,
and then scream for a long time, like they stole our solution :)
Well, I’ve given you a short course for a novice builder. I can give
Advice for those who want to try:
-Boy, are you sick?!!! Haven't I told you enough HORROR things?
Go, idiot, at least become an astronaut!
Brief dictionary for a civil engineering student:
The object is ruins that need to be destroyed.
The team is a crowd of builders.
The goat is a stand for the builder. (or the builder himself.)
Trowel - shovel (small)
Apply Mortar - Quickly apply mortar to the wall.
Work out
(Solution) - Quickly get rid of the solution (you can through the window)
Register - treat the brigade with vodka upon joining
her.
Discharge is the same as after leaving practice.
Business trip(for a student) - To the store for vodka.
Fill in
"flush" seams - Push as much mortar into the hole as there is in
it will fit.
Sweep
“from more” - Blooper, everything is ready. (pretend to wave
broom)
Work "from brimstone" - Blooper, but it will do.
Work "From white" - Blooper, redo everything...
Close
(solution) - Drop into the water solution.
Hackwork - Main job, paid in dollars.
KSA - Kolbasko Svtlana Antonovna.
(Teacher of special technology)
Special technology - Long sequence of commands, hanpab-
dedicated to performing a specific task,
(surface plastering)
Synonym: "Plastering ALGORITHM)
Finisher - Plasterer, tiler (not to be confused with
- "finisher")
Finisher - Bad finisher.Defend your diploma - Duel with the commission. Vodka wins.
P.S. So, I’m getting ready to go to College. Let them not think that
in the khabzai there are only idiots... There are also FOOLS there!!!!!!
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