Humor - The editors often receive letters from readers in which they ask: “What do you need to have with you in order to read your name in your magazine at least once?”

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         |        Nimog |
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         - -
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     +-+ Rules of the Russian language +-+
     +-+(guide for editors)+-+
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 (C) Nonstantin Melikhan

The editor often receives letters from
readers in which they ask: "What
you need to have it with you so that at least once
read your last name in your magazine?
   I answer.  To read your last name in
magazine, you need to have money with you. Ruble
3. That is, as much as the magazine costs.
   And having bought a magazine, you can cross out
the editor's last name and enter yours. And read
her as many times as you like.
   But seriously speaking, to write,
you need to study the RULES OF THE RUSSIAN LANGUAGE.
   Let's say the word "editor". Nakaya this
part of speech?    Absolutely right -
PRONOUN.  Because every editor
takes place in the editorial office, but the author does not.
   What about the word "author"?  What is this? That's right -
NUMERAL.   Because the author always
asks the editor what date he is
come.   Editorhim in Russian
says: “Come back in two months,” and
for some reason he always comes exactly
in two months.
   Or, for example, the word "poet". What is this?
That's right - PARTICIPLE.  Because the poet
always involved in something. That is
often takes communion.  Almost every evening. A
in the morning he says: “Where am I? Where am I?” And this is already
Participle.  That is, the last stage
participles.
   Now about the signs.
   If the editor yawned and looked at
the clock is a SOFT KNOW that it’s time for the author
leave.
   What if the editor yawned and hit the author?
on the head, then it is already FIRST KNOWN that
It's time for the author to leave completely.
   And if the editor, yawning, kicks the author,
so that he leaves, and the author, yawning, kicks
editor so that he doesn't kick him, then this
already - KNOW THE PUNCTION.
   Let's take "woman".  This is good
the word is always written with some
familiar. When a child hears the word "woman" he always
puts an INTERROGATIVE SIGN.   young man -
AMAZING.   Man - COMMA.  A
old man - EXACTLY.
 Many people do not know TIMES well.  N
For example, what time is it: “I am eating. You are eating.
He's eating." That's right - lunchtime.
                   , ,
 A few words about CHILDREN, or rather about CHILDREN.
Most authors are divided into 2 KINDS:
MALE and FEMALE.   How to distinguish
a male author from a female one? Very simple.
Ifa poet means a man.  What if
poetess means woman.  And so on.
Critic and critic.   fabulist and
fabulist. Satirist and satirist. Novelist
and Novella Matveeva.
   Now - about WORD TRANSFER. Not everyone can
transfer words.   One carries them
ok.  The other is bad. The third one is not at all
transfers words.  Especially those who
indicate to the author the place where he should be sent
go.
   And finally - about CASE DECLATION.
As it turns out, everyone knows how to incline. Moreover
persuade not only in the editorial office, but also when leaving
to the street.   The author persuades the editor.
A man bends a woman over. Moreover, the man
persuades a woman in two cases: when he
failed to persuade her to do anything and
when she managed to persuade others to do so
men.
   So, watch yours carefully
tongue, because when it blooms
tongue, ears wither.

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