╔════════════════──────── ─────────────────── ───════════════════╗ │ PRINTED WITH CONTINUATION. │ ╚════════════════─────────────── ───────────────════════════════╝ (C) Yuri Nesterenko, Soft Master (R) Fedin Pavel Ten bytes that shocked the world. Chronicle of events. In October 2017, in conditions of chaos and anarchy, the who pushed the country, the leadership of the VKP(P) (All-Russian Computer The Party (Programmers) decided to seize power. Re- The gate was carried out quickly and almost without bloodshed. In advance the viruses sent blocked the work of the General Staff, post offices, banks and telegraphs, and detachments of revolutionary players trained in secret bases in the game in the 5th DOOM, occupied government buildings nia. The first decrees of the new government proclaimed: “Every program mist has the right to a free computer, free beer and free paid sleep" and "All Software Must Be Free". Chairman of the Supreme of the Hacker Council made an appeal to the population, in which torus sounded the historical phrase: “Now there is no more need be afraid of a man with a hard drive!" The very next day, lines lined up on the streets for free. paid beer. Rare non-drinking programmers will immediately deploy whether largespeculation, in addition, they tried to break into beer individuals whose programmer origins were clearly doubtful tel. The first riots broke out. Meanwhile, the Supreme Hacker Council issued a decree on taxation tax on the use of computers and software for all henporpam- mists, which led to the formation of the User League, sharply opposed tion to the new regime. Under these conditions, the CPSU(P) was forced hastily form armed detachments to defend the revolution. They consisted of a variety of people and therefore received the name Raz- Noah Guard. At the same time, the issue of symbolism and visual propaganda was being resolved. On the Motherboard Square (formerly Red) a con- monument to Wiener and von Neutmann. The flag was chosen white-blue-black, which symbolized Windows, Norton Commander and MS-DOS. The coat of arms depicted, of course, a computer (suggested The proposal to put another bottle of beer there was rejected by the Supreme Hacker Council after the personal intervention of the chairman). At this time, an extremist organization emerged from underground The "even hundred", consisting mainly of modem users, which immediately organized pogroms against ATS workers. Supreme Ha- The Ker Council did not intervene until the pogroms reached their peak, after just after that, a decree was issued on the free transfer of digital information formations over telephone lines, which caused great delight even-hundreds. However, not all political forces could win over to one's side. The growing User League yctpou- la on HardDisk Square (formerly Manezhnaya) a powerful demonstration under with the defiant slogan “The user is also a programmer!”, supported by programmers from the applied faction. The demonstration was carried out Nana guards, and the leaders of the Yuzersky League took refuge in the pre- office of Apple, where they asked for political asylum. now. After this, representatives of applied sciences were removed from their positions. leadership of the CPSU(P), and the new government was formed only from members of the system faction, which subsequently led to nepeu- change of party in the CPPS (Computer Party of Programmers-Sys- Temshchikov). In order to consolidate the victory over the renegades, the Supreme Hacker The Council passed a law on the universal introduction of hexadecimal number systems. The User League and applied workers tried to support to defeat the rebellion suppressed by the striking forces of mutant viruses. High The Great Hacker Council announced the beginning of hacker terror. In you- rallies were held in numerical centers under the slogan “Death of La- measures!", and on the streets the mixed guards patrols stopped the passers-by and asked them how much 7+5 would be. "12" answered here they were taken to Kesh (formerly Lubyanka), because the correct answer is 0C. Left-wing avirs (authors of viruses) tried to lynch Lozinsky, but they were determinedstopped by the right Avirs. But despite everything However, the provocations did not stop. There were reports that in the Tower (formerly BD) the new government in full force He's been playing DOOM 5 for days. But the Check commission found that this blatant lie - the government played the 12th Beholder. One of the leaders of the User League, hiding in the Apple building, made a joke about how the free program promised to every programmer A regular computer is a computer without boards. In response to this, the chairman The head of the Supreme Hacker Council demanded to ban Russian language, as not amenable to syntactic analysis and correct broadcast, but this bold decision was blocked by that part VHS, which did not know English. Meanwhile, a new split was brewing within the CPSU(P) itself. Fraction ra- wild systemists, whose positions became significantly stronger after the soft- application workers, began a campaign to ban Windows and remove removal of the white stripe from the flag. But the split did not have time to deepen, after Since at this time the country ran out of beer. At the same time, another catastrophe happened: the crushed taxed users began to throw away their computers and count on their accounts tah. The cache was full. The regime was on the verge of collapse. Supreme The Hacker Council met all night and then expelled him from the country. representatives of Apple and proclaimed the NEP - New Ergonomic nal Programming. What is this, no oneknew, but it sounded beautiful. At this time, a famous foreign virus writer visited Moscow (still not renamed) and, being under the impression In response to everything he saw, a new virus wrote. Thanks to the wide to the new Decium processor's instruction set, it fit the entire in 10 bytes. The virus has alarmed the world community, because now the spontaneous emergence of viruses as a result of random failures has become the impossible is simply improbable. The ideologists of the CPSU(P) saw in this broad perspective: the time will come when programs will write themselves, and programmers will only play DOOM and Beholder, drink beer and sleep. A congress of programmer mo- youth, at which the chairman of the Supreme Hacker Council produced carried the historical phrase: "The current generation of programmers will live!"
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