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(C) RINDEX
Since MASTER SOFT is passing the exams, I will amuse you and
IRONMAN.
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(C) SPEED INFO
(R) RINDEX
My husband was so jealous that he pulled the mechanic down the stairs and
fixed the faucet.
In the morning I gave her $100, and then I found out that she was a tax preparer.
torus
She asked again: “Schwarznegger? He’s so small, fat
and wearing glasses? I immediately understood what she should do with me in Hollywood
nothing.
My boyfriend always calls me “pizza with mushrooms”, then
"shrimp with beer." Maybe I should feed him better?
At work in the savings bank I think about bed, and in bed - only about
money.
I noticed that the green buttons on her blouse were sewn on with black
threads, and realized that she was unlucky with her husband.
I didn't take my pants off for four months. There was simply no reason.
At the party I “did too much” and now I’m wondering who took advantage of it.
called.
Pushkin was not a nun either.
Zhenya told fortunes on my hand, then on my shoulder, and so on...
For some reason, in the most intimate place, my vocabulary runs out
stock
I told her I wasn't going anywhere. But my husband came and insisted.
At first I resisted, and then I spat - let him choke.
Came to our store"Intimate", there is a doll - 300$, #$!@@$% -
$150. It's cheaper to have a woman.
Understand a woman whose erogenous zone has turned into a zone
torture...
I wanted something soothing, like a woman.
Then for the first time he hinted that he wouldn’t mind sleeping with me.
fall. The hint was so subtle that I didn’t understand it right away. Got it
in two and a half years.
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(C) IRONMAN
Announcement at the Georgian Institute:
"Entrance exams will not take place. All tickets have been sold"
A young man enters a theater institute. During his exam
They give you a task - a sketch: to depict an elephant. He makes a stupid expression
face, turns out both trouser pockets and says:
-Show me the trunk?
The applicant takes an exam in physics. The examiner told him:
-Run around the table.
The applicant flinches and receives a negative assessment.
The next examiner says the same thing, to which the applicant responds
answers with a question:
-And with what acceleration?
A young guy enters a university. Passes exams in mathematics. He
you need to draw a circle. He goes to the blackboard, takes the chalk and,
tearing off his hands, he draws a clear circle.
-How did you manage to do this without a compass?
-And I spent two years in the army turning a meat grinder.
The professor showed the applicant the tail of some animal and asked
sews:
- Determine what animal it is.
The applicant looked, looked, stood up and went to the door.
-How's yours?surname?! - The professor screams.
“You can tell by the tail,” said the applicant and, wagging his back, he went out
from the audience.
Entrance exams to the conservatory, the professor addresses
to the applicant:
-Please name the names of composers you know.
-Sheet.
-Okay.
-Bach.
-Amazing. Well, now, one of the modern ones.
-Silent H..v.
- Well, you, my friend, bent it.
- Sorry, professor, - Tikhon Khrennikov.
Telegram from parents:
"How are the exams? Let me know urgently!"
Answer: “The exam went brilliantly. The professors are delighted. They ask
repeat in the fall."
Letter from a Ukrainian student home:
"Come on out!!! Hello, mom..."
The lecture has begun. One student was late. Lecturer:
-Why are you late?
-Sorry, professor, I took part in a rally competition.
After some time, another student comes in.
The professor asks:
-Are you also from the rally?
The student was stunned:
-No, I smoked...
Lecture at the institute. The professor explains the topic and at the same time
writes on the board. Having written on the board, he immediately lowers it on top of it.
another and continues to write.
The young girl in the first desk, without having time to finish writing, says:
-Professor, I haven’t finished yet, and you’ve already let me down!
A physics student became interested in religion and transferred to a seminary. Here's the si-
He sits during lectures and, out of habit (or maybe out of habit), takes naps.
wat. During the lecture, the priest comes up to him and asks:
-So, tell me, what is divine power?
-Divinemass for divine acceleration.
A professor at a lecture says that a man during sexual intercourse
intercourse loses so much energy that this energy was quite enough
would be enough to push one freight car from its place. One student
dentka, stretching:
-Oh, now I wish I had a train to Vladivostok!
Three students meet: a university, a technical school and a military school
- and tell each other about the exams.
“We,” says the university student, “have a question on the exam paper:
"How is current measured?" and three answer options: in volts,
in ohms, in amperes. And you need to choose the right one.
“We have,” says the second, “a question: “Isn’t it measured in amperes?”
amperage?" and three possible answers: yes, no, I don’t know. You need to select
it's correct.
- And here, says the third, - the question “Current strength is measured in ampere -
pax" and three answers: yes, yes, that’s right. So suffer, choose the right one
vilny
One student comes in and sees another student there, up to his elbows.
pushing and looking for something.
- What are you doing there, huh?
- Yes, the jacket got sucked in there.
- So what, will you wear it after this?
- No, I have a sandwich there!
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(C) IRONMAN
I WILL TELL YOU A STORY,
WHETHER IT'S TRUE OR FICTION IS FOR YOU TO DECIDE.
A man was walking through a field and forest when he saw a well. Threw a pebble
I listened - silence. I picked up the boulder, strained myself,threw it, listened - silence. I rummaged through the bushes and found
rail, rested, got wet, dragged, threw - silence. Worth it
in disbelief. Suddenly a goat jumps out from the forest and rushes towards
well and jumps into it. The guy has finally disappeared and is standing
dumbfounded. Then another guy comes out of the bushes and
asks: 'Listen, have you seen my goat?' - So... from...
blah... jumped out of the forest and ran into the well... it...'
- 'It's strange... After all, it was tied to the rail...'
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(C) RINDEX
(C) IRONMAN
You all know that the ON-LINE newspaper has a TOP-10 section. There
the top ten best-selling games on the market in Mitino are given, at the point
MAGIC SOFT's. So, we declare with full confidence that
TOP-10 in ON-LINE is incorrect!!! And therefore, we offer you
the most truthful TOP-7. Why 7??? So there's almost nothing else
they don't take it. So occasionally they will take 15'S, and so on. Mostly they take
These games are in great demand. Well, our comments are just below.
Share your thoughts about the article