PRINTED WITH
CONTINUED
On these notebook pages,
I'll leave my memory
To remember the soldier's service,
When I go to civilian life.
Thank you dear army
For youth with a bald head.
Don't always talk
What you think
But always think
What are you saying?
The army made me understand
That only a mother knows how to wait.
Girls, go for a walk in civilian life,
While I'm shaking my foot wraps.
Don't be afraid friend
The time will come
There will be no stripes and pagon
And somewhere in a quiet place
We will sip moonshine.
So what is the soldier’s fault?
When does a girl cheat on him?
Yes, in that he is squeezing a machine gun,
Excuse me, he protects such people.
The rose withers in the water
And the soldier is wearing a gas mask.
Vodka is the enemy
But the soldier is not afraid of the enemy.
The Tatars tortured us for 300 years
And they couldn’t bend it in any way.
In a year and a half they bent like this here,
It will not be straightened out in 300 years.
"Alone in the field is not a warrior" -
the signalman said and went to bed.
Girls, wait, we will be back,
As soon as our order comes out
And again we will smile at everyone
And we will kiss you deeply.
“I love the hike,” said the battalion commander,
Getting into the car.
"YesMay you die," said the soldier,
He carried the bag onto his back.
Greetings from Poltava region,
Where vodka has long been forgotten,
Where girls are valued like gods,
And they only see them in movies.
Through the field, through the forest
The demobilization express is on its way.
Watch out girl
Grandfathers are going home.
I am writing a letter very quietly,
Your image flashes in my eyes.
And I'm so sorry that I don't know
When we meet you.
People, don't be afraid, these are not wolves,
This is my friend and I being AWOL again.
Life is a wolf's path
Along which you must walk, baring your teeth.
Both in dreams and in reality,
I'll tear my mouth for butter.
If only I survive
To the great citizen,
I'll definitely get drunk
From a three-liter jar.
Let's have a drink, brothers, let's have a drink here,
In the next world they won’t give it,
Well, if they give it,
Let's have a drink, brothers, here and there.
A smoke break not only shortens your life,
But also service life.
Life is a queue for death,
Where the soldier stands out of line.
And at the hour of dawn and at the hour of sunset
No matter how hard or easy it may be,
Girl, don't forget the soldier,
Which serves far.
Instincts are stronger here than brains,
Desires are stronger than the soul,
But if you were raised by a Man,
Then you should be hungryuntil the end.
We have a good political officer,
We have only one political officer,
So let's get together
And we'll give him pussy.
Work is a holiday for a soldier,
But soldiers don’t work on holidays.
To serve in the Signal Corps you must have:
- impudent face;
- strong stomach;
- not a drop of conscience.
A soldier's life is a struggle,
Before lunch - with hunger,
And after lunch - with sleep.
Mass at night, mass during the day,
So we'll get to demobilization.
Why do I love the army?
Because you don't have to go to the circus.
Those who have not attended training will not understand
How difficult it can be and you want to sleep,
When at dawn you get up a little alive
And the drill guards lead us to exercise.
For the spirit - dinner and lights out,
Grandfather - demobilization and home.
So the evening has come,
Grandfather came to the barracks to sleep
Grandfather is in no hurry to go to bed,
Grandfather's service is good.
There is no better word in the world -
Smoke break, lights out, lunch.
You fly for six months
You live for six months
You've been stupid for six months
And you are waiting for demobilization.
Don't want to sleep at night -
get a mistress
If you don't want to sleep during the day, get married
You don't want to sleep at all -
go to the army.
Rise, release, rise, release,
Hitting your head on something
fliesboot, belt flying -
This is how a soldier lives all day.
Rise, release, rise, release,
Hit your head on the bench.
The boot is flying, the belt is flying
The cadet flies all day.
The girl salutes 1 time,
And a soldier - 1.5 years.
And whose fault is it that day after day
The orderly shouts to us: “Get up!”
And we dream of our home,
The order we've been waiting for.
Hurry up, dinner and lights out,
I wish I could demobilize and go home soon.
The bird misses flying,
The fish misses the water,
And I’m in that distant Poltava
I only miss you.
Let you forget the soldier,
Even if you don't love him,
He won't drop the machine gun,
Even though you hurt him.
There are no people here - only soldiers,
There is no snow here - only rain.
Here instead of women there are machine guns,
We press them to our chest.
Remember, my dear friend,
This is the phrase of all time:
Who needs you most?
So this is his mother.
Who is to blame, tell me, brother,
Why should I get dressed again with you?
And whose fault is it here and there?
The girls are no longer waiting for us.
There's emptiness in our hearts
But we must not leave our post.
Who is to blame and what is the secret?
What is "spirit" here?
And there is a “grandfather” here.I wish I could get me a bucket of sour cream
And a bowl full of pancakes.
I wish I could dip pancakes in sour cream
And fuck me your love.
Who is happy to drink happiness drop by drop,
He is rich in happiness for a long time.
Who binged on it beyond their satiety,
Who took everything he could from life,
The one at the broken trough
Sits gloomily and alone.
I was living calmly, and suddenly there was a summons.
Farewell, friends; goodbye bride
I'm leaving for those lands
Where they only drink vodka when they are demobilized.
It's easy to die for a friend
But it's hard to find a friend
One to die for.
The sentry is a corpse,
Wrapped in a sheepskin coat,
Instructed to tears
And exposed to the cold.
I'm in the Army now
The sergeant is chasing me,
And in civilian life at this hour
My friends are drinking.
Don't say the world is sad
Don't say it's hard to live
Be able to survive amid the ruins of life
Laugh, believe and love.
I am writing from places where there are no brides.
Where the parade ground is burning under boots,
Where youth is shackled in cotton
And the girls become gods.
Who's to blame for you being tired?
That I didn’t eat enough and didn’t sleep,
Ran six kilometers
I came to the barracks and fell.
Conscience is wealth
And soldiers are poor people.
Going to heaven
No fellow travelerslooking for.
Sleep is the only activity
Which the soldier performs conscientiously.
There are no perpetual motion machines in the Army,
There are constant brakes in the Army.
Someday in my native land,
When you return home,
Soldier's small notebook
Read it and smile.
Who was a student - saw youth,
Who was a soldier - saw life,
Who was in Poltava - saw Hell
And he is truly a soldier.
Don't read the notebook, son -
Your soul is still with God
After all, he will understand these lines,
Who gave 1.5 years to the Motherland.
A soldier is like a tractor -
It's been plowing for six months and undergoing repairs for a year.
A soldier is a person
Deprived of everything
But capable of much.
Modesty adorns a person
But the soldier doesn’t wear jewelry.
Soldier like a fire extinguisher:
Until you hit it, it won't work.
When God gave away intelligence
The army was on exercises.
We were molded like bread
We were ground into the asphalt.
Who passed the knot
He will pass Buchenwald.
Greetings from the city of Poltava,
Where the autumn wind rustles,
Here my service flies
And my heart is sad for home.
The day will come, the hour will come,
They will build us for the last time
And they will read the order to us
About transfer to the reserve.
There are no healthy and sick people in the army,There are living and dead in the army.
Like a black eagle at the top of the Caucasus,
The spirit sits silently on the toilet cistern.
The sexiest book is THE CHARTER,
Fuck on every page.
Forget the soldiers for 1.5 years,
That a person lives in you.
Remember that your freedom
He will come during demobilization.
The best cure for love is
Running and gas mask.
Demobilization is coming soon, thought the spirit
And he wiped his nose with a cloth.
How are you? Things are like in a fairy tale -
There is no vodka, no sausage,
We only see eggs in the bathhouse
Between Sergeant Sani's legs.
Life is a book
Army is 2 sheets torn out
in the most interesting place.
A drunken landing party is worse than a tank,
A hungry radio operator is worse than a landing party.
Those who were not will be
Who was there will not forget
540 days in boots.
Who was not in training,
He won't understand
How you want to eat
How I want to sleep.
Like a black eagle
From my life
Fate flew away in 540 days.
This is not a plane for you,
This spirit is taking off.
In the arms, legs -
There is pain everywhere.
There's sand in my mouth
There is salt on the shirt.
There is sadness in the eyes,
There is sadness in my soul.
That's what it is
Communications-Troops.
Soldier without swearing,
Like a shutter without a machine gun.
Remember, soldier, the lawOhm:
They fuck you in the Army,
And my friend is at home.
This is not rock, this is not jazz
These are two spirits scrubbing the toilet.
(Continuation of soldier's rhymes and jokes
read in the next town)
* * * *
And now we bring to your attention two
soldiers' prayers.
SOLDIER'S PRAYER (1)
May God protect us
From night worries
From rising early,
From the orderly's cry,
From the high horizontal bar,
Far from the cross-country
From physical activities,
Combat and tactical.
From seasonal clothes,
From the garrison lip,
From the prone position
God save us -
A M I N B.
SOLDIER'S PRAYER (2)
Our Father who art in heaven,
Hail to Mother Demobilization.
Save the servant of God:
From rising early,
From the orderly's cry,
From Clutching the machine gun to his chest.
There's really nothing to say here - the guy sucks.
And now you will read a very instructive
verse-poem about a girl's betrayal of a soldier.
Yesterday a letter arrived to a soldier
I’m in the same company as Niivo “Zhigulevskoe”,
The Vorskla River into Smirnovskaya vodka,
Quench the thirst of a soldier
And save it until DMB.
* * * *
Anow - a couple of megalyrical creations
cadets of the Poltava communications unit.
I am writing from the Poltava region,
Where your feet rot from dampness,
Where they dress in 40 seconds
And they lead us into the dining room.
This applies to the communications service,
I won't write about this
Because, dear girl,
You won't understand this life.
You sit and read magazines,
I sit and learn the rules.
In the evening you walk in the park,
I'm walking along the parade ground as a drill worker.
You are picking flowers across the field,
The breeze blows over you.
I walk on Poltava land,
I remember my hometown.
And when I return to civilian life,
I'll tell you everything in detail:
What is a communications service?
And especially in the first year.
You and your friend are going dancing,
I'm going from outfit to outfit.
At night you rest in bed,
Well, I’m standing with a machine gun.
You are dissatisfied with your freedom,
I’ll keep quiet about mine for now.
And you go to bed calmly,
I'm flying to the bed like a bullet.
The alarm clock gently wakes you up,
The orderly is yelling in my ear.
And when the young guys
Girls kiss in the evenings
I stand at my post and dream
Clutching the machine gun to his chest.
Yeah, there's nothing to say here - guysucks.
And now you will read a very instructive
verse-poem about a girl's betrayal of a soldier.
Yesterday a letter arrived to a soldier
I serve in the same company with him,
He showed it to his brother
And he revealed his soul to me.
The girl wrote to him,
That "we've been friends for a long time
A year and a half is a long time,
I decided to get married."
I thought he was going to jump now
The heavy one will grab the machine gun,
The fatal shot will ring out,
The soldier will fall to the ground.
But I was wrong: at that moment
He just laughed loudly
For some reason he got into his pocket,
I took out a rusty penny,
The soldier threw it into the envelope.
Then I found a scrap of paper,
He pressed his booted foot tightly
(Canvas boot!), a footprint was imprinted.
He wrote with a firm hand:
"Girlfriend, hello, I'll be brief
I'm alive and well, everything is fine.
I'm sending a penny for your wedding,
And there is nothing else.
I valued you, loved you and believed you,
But the price has dropped sharply.
Your price is one penny,
Take it as a souvenir from me.
Take another look at the soldier's trail,
What I printed for you
There's nothing in it but dirt,
Such dirt lives in you."
He also added with a smile:
"I don't need you like that,Goodbye, holey penny,
Farewell, bride, forever."
Great lines, aren't they? Well done boy
that he didn’t worry about the cruel letter
your girlfriend! And even more well done because
let that fool know what she was really worth.
And finally, in our army section you
You will see a short dictionary of a soldier.
SOLDIER'S DICTIONARY
┌─┐
│D om
│ │
│M oh
│ │
│B is lick
└─┘
┌─┐
│K olosalno
│ │
│U universal
│ │
│Working
│ │
│Silt
│ │
│Absolutely
│ │
│H willing
│ │
│Don't work hard
└─┘
┌─┐
│Soldat
│ │
│L loving
│ │
│Oh fucking
│ │
│N load
└─┘
┌─┐
│With you
│ │
│For the best
│ │
│U rock
│ │
│F life
│ │
│It was
│ │
│A army
└─┘
┌─┐
│Fizical
│ │
│And emaciation
│ │
│3 healthy
│ │
│About the body
└─┘
│
│ ARMY - a car with a lot of brakes
│
║ EVENING CHECK - find your name
║
║ ORDER - Dartagnan and the Three Musketeers
║
║ CROSS - no one wants to die young
║
║ KUNG - death chamber
║
║ OIL - a piece of happiness
║
║ END - Ilove you life
║
║ PLATZ - valley of death
║
║ AGENDA - a start to life
║
║ DINING ROOM - the Iroquois went hunting
║
║ BUILDING - walking through torment
║
║ TOILET - freedom of action
│
│ TERMINATION is a chance in a thousand
│
It has already become a certain tradition that we
We publish funny stories by Igor Milekhin. And I
I sincerely hope that you receive a certain
I have a blast reading them. So here's another story from
Smelyansky prose writer and poet, Milekhin
Igor.
Read the story, and if you don't like it, then
come up with some funny story of your own and
send it to our editor (or bring it in). However,
in any case, come up with it and bring it to us
something interesting!!!
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