Body #0A 28 августа 1997

Юмор

Super Smile - Jokes, jokes and stories from life.

                          SUPER SMILE!

(C) DELTA MDM 270-30-41

BZ> And here is the first material for the competition 'FUN'. 
To us courtesy of DELTA ... 

FUN 1:
Come on, we once Sanya, and he says to me, DIM, see what kind of
cool girls (for girls wore socks - long
golf) cedar.

FUN 2:
I come to this very SANE in armiyu.My long said: I
asked how his life there, he rasprashival about my business for
citizen and at the end of the conversation when he was five 
minutes had to leave in part, he says: "Dima, ME SOMETHING ELSE 
nothing, and HERE IS WE HAVE ONE kid he did it, as there is 
called when the FROM NOSE GOES pus - T E M O R O J. "I say to 
him can be Sinusitis, he says: "rather, I'm a little confused!"


Joke:
Drunk man till you drop, lay down on a bench and zasnul.Mimo 
this shop Georgians took place and decided to fuck the guy, 
after he did the Georgians left with the guy next to money, let 
them, thinking, man vypet.Na next morning a man gets up and 
sees the next any money, was delighted, ran to the store and 
bought a bottle vodka and got drunk again and lay down on the 
bench this past otsypatsya.Opyat shop held Georgians and again 
he raped a peasant, as well as in Last time, the Georgians left 
dengi.Muzhik wakes up, sees money radosny ran to the store and 
the salesgirl says: - Give me two bottles of wine!

The saleswoman asks:
- WHY WINE IN FACT ALL THE TIME Braley vodka?
A guy says:
- Something with vodka ASS VERY hurts!

Joke:
King announced the decree:
- Who will drink MORE, someone wake's eye Cyclops and who can
The approaches to my daughter, to him I will give LPO kingdom, 
and of course A daughter in marriage.

All samples, from anyone, even the sea to drink does not work, 
but here RUSSKIY.On comes to legontsah drink sea, then comes

in the cave to the Cyclops ... within half an hour there 
razdoyutsya heart-rending cries of, well, finally goes RUSSIAN, 
all sweaty, foamy and says:

- Now displays ME PRINCESS whose eyes Tear
NOT!

FUN 3:
I am going once a trolleybus to a friend, and I was about three 
guys years, so at 10! So here is one started telling anecdote: 
"Once Once on a desert island Petka, Vasily Ivanovich and ... 
"and He recalled three minutes the name of the third and finally

remembered: "So, being a desert island Petka, BASIL
Ivanovic and CHAPAEV !..."

FUN 4:
Once I read one funny ad, here is how it looks:
"SELL CARPET 3x4 or me on the same piece of bacon ..."

Joke:
Suitable for Vasily Ivanovich and Petka says:
- Guess the mystery - two ends, two rings and in the middle 
CARNATIONS? Thought Petya and answers:

- DO NOT KNOW ...
Chapaev says:
- Well, are you that Petka SAME SCISSORS.
- Otgoday another mystery - said Chapaev, without windows, 
without doors Upper Room is FULL OF PEOPLE?

- Do not know, "said Petya.
- It's BEAUTY!
Takes time Petya meets Furmanova and says
him:
- Guess a riddle ...
- Come on, "says Furmanov.
- No windows, no door to complete ass CUCUMBERS !!!???
- Do not know, "says Furmanov," Nonsense is some TURNS!
Petka says:
- That's what I say - nonsense, and Vasily Ivanovich said 
SCISSORS! 

FUN 5:
Once I drove the tram and saw the glass just such an 
inscription: "WHEN THE ACCIDENT break the glass, mallets, 
HAMMER A driver!" 

FUN 6:
I Druganov went to the store to buy a couple bottles of beer
and sit in bare.Vzyali beer and come to the office, and there on
shelves are different gum: STIMOROL, ORBIT, etc., I say
Let's recoverable, pozhuem he soglasilsya.Vzyali first available
pack, she looked a little originalno.Podhodit our
turn, the cashier starts counting at the end adds 10 800.My
ask:
- And it is for that kind of money??
she replies:
- THE Gum!
My friend says:
- WELL YOU AGREE?!
And she meets a little smile:
- I have YET NOTHING GIVE ...

FUN 7:
Watched on a TV transmission, as is said, I do not remember, 
yes it is and it does not matter, so here and there begin to 
tell how the Georgians walked to the conservatory:

COME, THEN, THIS GEORGIANS AND SAYS:
- I want to come to you.
They answered him:
- WE NEED YOU LISTEN.
He agrees. He is asked to enter the hall and OH Come on! 
GEORGIAN SAY:

- NOW WE TAKE piano chord, and you'll have
Guess.
He is asked to turn away, that he should not peeping, he agrees.
CLICK ON THE PIANO KEY and asks:
- So what?
GEORGIANS TURNS, LOOKS CLOSELY AT THE COMMISSION AND SAYS:
- You're pulling!, "Pointing to one of the members.

Joke:
Chukchi is in Moscow and when he sees the land lies
mirror, ups and says:
- Oh! YOU look, my ...

Joke:
It was cold February night, all night Stirlitz stoked stove! On
Morning furnace broke down and drowned!

Joke:
Met a mere two nihilists and one says to another:
- I do not care, I have PAST SALARY pick up, but I do
Do not care!
Others answer:
- This is nonsense, here I do not care ALL, SO DO ALL do not 
care. YESTERDAY I went to his ENTRANCE, THERE SHOULD ASK AND MOB

ME, YOU Kohl, I say YES! They started to beat me, but I do not 
care, I'll NOT Kohl ...


FUN 8:
This joke I told a friend:
We were sitting, said on a bench near the entrance, chatting 
and all of a sudden elevator peeps man and asks:

- Hey, Guys, THIS IS WHAT FLOOR??

FUN 9:
Once they sat down with friends and you would not believe, 
guessed the crossword. Comes the question:

- FROM prosimians primates??
Who of us:
- PERSON!

FUN 10:
I want to tell you how Chukchi catches flies and cockroaches, 
so: - Fly-drives to the attic and cleans up the ladder? then 
drives cockroach under the cupboard and saw off legs!


FUN 11:
On 1 April, I saw on TV a joke:
- Decided to create a new group that would include soloist
GROUP 'combination' and Iosif Kobzon. so here this group is 
named -= KOMBINIZON =-.


BZ> That's all for Today. WAITING ON YOU NEW FUN AND as long as

   LEADS DELTA.